If you've ever gone completely blank in the middle of a hard conversation, or found yourself frozen, heart hammering, unable to say a single thing, this episode is for you.

A listener wrote in asking why she shuts down instead of getting upset. Why everyone else seems to cry or fight while she just goes numb and feels nothing. And whether something is wrong with her.

The answer is no. And this whole episode is the explanation.

We cover the difference between freeze and shutdown, because they get used interchangeably and they are not the same thing. Freeze is high activation trapped under stillness. Shutdown is the system going offline entirely. Two different nervous system responses, two different origins, two different things that actually help.

We also talk about why the tools that usually work, breathing, grounding, thinking your way through it, don't reach you when you're in shutdown, and what actually does.

If you recognize yourself in either of these patterns, this episode will give you language for something that's probably been really hard to explain.

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This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or nutritional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

Remember, I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. Nothing in this podcast is meant to replace actual therapy or treatment. If you're in crisis or things feel really unsafe right now, please reach out to someone. You can call 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, text them, or head to your nearest ER.

The views expressed by the host and guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organizations or institutions. Reliance on any information provided by this podcast is solely at your own risk.