Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:

As the holidays approach and we’re inundated with messages about thankfulness, you may wonder: does gratitude actually change anything? Is there science behind the old advice to “count your blessings”? In this episode of Your Hope-Filled Perspective, I’m diving into the connection between Gratitude and Neuroscience, showing how adopting a heart of gratitude impacts not just our spiritual lives but also our mental and physical health. Scripture reminds us that what God commands aligns beautifully with how He created us. I’ll share 25+ unique things to be grateful for and why cultivating thankfulness, even during tough times, is so important. Together, we’ll look at how gratitude helps us see hidden blessings and keeps our focus on God’s faithfulness.

Quotables from the episode:

• God never wastes our pain; even in difficulty, we can find reasons to be grateful.
• When we will be continually in a prayerful posture, God will open our eyes, our minds, and our hearts to recognize and then be willing to thank him for all those things that we had previously dismissed or not considered.
• I want to have a constantly grateful heart. So I'm consistently challenging myself to notice little or unusual things in life, those things that maybe I sometimes take for granted, and offer up thanks for them. 
• When God tells us to be thankful in all situations, He means it, but I believe that as we pray without ceasing, like that verse in First Thessalonians said, that God is the one who creates a thankful heart in us.
• Start with the small things. Start with the unusual things. And I'm firmly convinced that the more we cultivate an attitude of gratitude, the more we realize we really do have to be blessed and thank God for.
• Gratitude shifts our perspective, revealing God’s hidden blessings in our everyday lives.

Scripture References:

• 1 Thessalonians 5:17-18 “Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.”
• Proverbs 17:22 “A merry heart does good like medicine.”
• Psalm 139:16 “Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”
• Romans 12:18 “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”

Recommended Resources: 

• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Host:

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Dr. Michelle Bengtson is an international speaker, a national and international media resource on mental health, and the bestselling, award-winning author of Hope Prevails, the Hope Prevails Bible Study, Today Is Going to Be a Good Day, Breaking Anxiety’s Grip, The Hem of His Garment, and Sacred Scars. She is also the host of the award-winning podcast Your Hope-Filled Perspective. A board-certified clinical neuropsychologist in private practice for more than twenty years, Dr. Bengtson blogs regularly and offers a wide variety of resources on her website, DrMichelleB.com.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary: 

In this episode of the Sacred Scar Story Series on Your Hope-Filled Perspective, I had the opportunity to talk with Becky Beresford about a significant time in her life when things didn’t go as she hoped and meticulously planned. She experienced physical, emotional, relational, and spiritual pain. She shares how her first pregnancy was fraught with complications, leading to grief, loss, and deep wounds. Becky discusses how she learned to trust God through her struggles and how He brought healing, leaving her with beautiful sacred scars as a reminder of His faithfulness.

Quotables from the episode:

• Jesus is good and with us in our suffering.
• If it weren’t for my scars, I wouldn’t know Jesus like I do.
• When life turned out the opposite of what we prayed for, I had to heal from the inside out.
• God uses our seasons of painful darkness to bring comfort to others.
• Joy and grief can and often are intertwined.
• Scars remind me what God brought me through.
• The enemy kept telling me “You’re not enough.” The truth is, I’m not enough, but God is enough.
• Satan tried to define me by what I considered my failures but my God is bigger.
• God shines through my weakness.
• God is so faithful and he got me through the hardest time of my life, and now my scars are a reminder of what he has done.
• Rainbows aren’t actually arches, but rather, full circles. Rainbows can only be seen from a higher perspective, and God’s promises are still true even when I can’t see the whole picture.

Recommended Resources: 

• She Believed He Could So She Did: Trading Culture’s Lies for Christ-Centered Empowerment by Becky Beresford
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Becky Beresford:

Website / Empowered Email Tribe / Instagram / Facebook

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

BECKY BERESFORD lives in North Carolina and is happily outnumbered by her husband and three wonderful boys. She is an author, speaker and coach with a Master's Certificate in Spiritual Formation and Discipleship from Moody Theological Seminary. Becky loves encouraging God’s Daughters to embrace Christ-centered empowerment through the truth found in the gospel, and her first book with Moody Publishers, She Believed HE Could, So She Did, released in March, 2024.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary: 

In this Sacred Scar Story, we hear from Lori Wildenberg who faced the unimaginable pain of nearly losing her daughter to depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts. She shares how her faith and God’s presence guided her through this dark journey, ultimately bringing healing to both her daughter and herself. This story of resilience and hope offers encouragement for anyone navigating similar struggles.

Quotables from the episode:

• Wounds have to be uncovered and cleaned out before real healing can take place.
• With great pain often comes fear, which can paralyze us and keep us from moving forward.
• Even when God healed my loved one, I had to come to the realization that I, too, had wounds that needed healing.
• It sounds counterintuitive but helping others helped heal me.
• God sets us up to have interdependent relationships.
• God is our helper.
• Even those parts of our lives that are messy and embarrassing can be used by God to help others.
• If you suspect your child is suffering from anxiety, depression, or suicidal ideation, ask them if they are thinking of hurting themselves, so you don’t have to ask, ‘Why didn’t they tell me?’ 

Scripture References:

• Hebrews 6:19 (NIV) We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. 
• John 16:33 (NIV) I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. 

Recommended Resources: 

• Messy Hope: Help Your Child Overcome Anxiety, Depression, or Suicidal Ideation by Lori Wildenberg
• Messy Journey: How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home by Lori Wildenberg
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Lori Wildenberg:

Website / Facebook / FB Community / FB Group / Instagram Lori / Instagram Moms / Podcast

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Helping families create connections that last a lifetime is Lori Wildenberg’s passion. Lori, wife to Tom, mom of 4, and Mimi to 1, shares her stories of failures and successes, in her books and talks, to encourage and equip parents. As a licensed parent and family educator, she leads the Moms Together Facebook group and page and co-hosts the Moms Together Podcast. The Wildenberg home is nestled in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. www.loriwildenberg.com 

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary:

Our guest on this episode, Kathy Collard Miller, was raised by a very angry mother. The more Kathy tried to suppress her anger, the more it surfaced. Over time, Kathy found herself expressing her anger toward her husband and her daughter, and in her own words, abusing her daughter. Kathy shares her painful wounds in this episode, as well as the story of redemption and the beautiful sacred scars God has given her.

Quotables from the episode:

• Sometimes when we talk about pain or wounds, that pain comes at the hand of another. Sometimes we have no explanation for why it happens (like a medical diagnosis), and sometimes we participate in choices that end up hurting us in the long run.
• Frequently our greatest areas of ministry come out of our greatest areas of pain.
• I have a unique story because not only was I wounded, but I wounded others in turn.
• As a child, I didn’t know I had anger building up inside of me until in third grade I hit my best friend in the nose. To this day, I have no recollection what I was so angry about that would prompt me to be aggressive. As my friend ran away sobbing, I thought to myself, “See what happens when you get angry, Kathy? You’d better never get angry again!”
• Buried anger doesn’t go anywhere except making a volcano.
• Also in the third grade, I was sexually harmed, although I didn’t know that that was what it was called, but I thought it was my fault and that I should have prevented it. So the anger toward myself began to build.
• My mother was orphaned at the age of ten, resulting in her own anger issues toward me that built up inside of me. I didn’t know it would be detrimental toward others later, but I’ve also found it to be something that God has used in amazing ways.
• I was never taught how to appropriately deal with my anger. As a little girl who tried to be perfect to prevent me from overreacting in anger, I then thought that God must be disappointed in me and that he was expecting me to be angry.
• Because of the messages I was taught when I was growing up, I pictured God in heaven with his arms crossed saying, “Kathy, when are you going to be perfect so I can love you?”
• After I became a Christian at 17, I married my husband, Larry. But all the anger that had built up in me started coming out toward him because his promise of being my perfect, Godly, prince charming didn’t come true and left me totally disappointed. I interpreted that as there was something wrong with me.
• I began to believe I wasn’t loved or cared for and that came out in bitterness, anger, criticism, never being happy, or never being thankful for what my husband did do.
• I began to displace my anger toward my husband on to my two-year-old daughter because when she misbehaved, I interpreted that as “I am a horrible mother.” In the end, I began to physically abuse her.
• I kept praying for an instantaneous deliverance of my anger and when God didn’t do that, I believed God had given up on me, and I almost took my life. But God intervened.
• We have to feel it to heal it, meaning we have to acknowledge the pain. Then we have to choose to engage in the healing process. When we don’t choose the path of healing, other things will happen and there will be consequences of that, until one day it comes out at a less opportune time and a less opportune way.
• Scripture talks about the importance of getting wise counsel. There is no shame in needing help. Seek out a trusted friend, a mentor, a counselor, a coach, or a pastor and get help.  Do not try to handle your pain alone.
• When people didn’t follow through with what they said they were going to do, I concluded that I was worthless.
• My healing began when I got the courage to share my sin with the women in my Bible study that I led in my neighborhood. They began to hold me accountable, and they prayed for me. I started taking parenting classes and reading books and I read in the Bible Ephesians 4:26, “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.”
• I can be angry, but surrender whatever it is that I think I deserve that’s causing my anger.
• God showed me that I was making my husband an idol because I was expecting him to be responsible for my happiness and contentment. That brought me to the place where I could acknowledge God was the only one who could fully meet my needs. And whether or not my husband ever changed, that was up to God.
• As God began to have me share my story, other women would come up to tell me that they struggled with the same thing but had never told anyone else.
• My relationship with my daughter and our family is healed. She has always supported my ministry sharing with others how I treated her. She loves God. I thought I had destroyed her, but God has redeemed us and brought about a sacred scar. There is always hope with the Lord.
• What the enemy intended for evil, God is using for good.
• There is healing when we share our story in safe places. We need to get wise, safe counsel so that we don’t go back into the hiding. Satan loves secrets and he loves to cause us to hide and isolate.
• My journey of healing came little by little by little.
• When we have thoughts, we need to stop and ask, “Is this the truth according to scripture?” If it is, we allow it in. But if it is not, we need to reject it, and recite God’s truth.
• If God can deliver a child abuser on the verge of suicide, God can help you!
• I was more concerned about Jesus’s reputation than my own. 

Scripture References:

• Ephesians 4:26 NIV “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.”
• Genesis 50:20 NIV “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.”
• Revelation 12:11 NIV “They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.”
• 2 Corinthians 10:5 NIV “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”
• James 5:16 NIV “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”

Recommended Resources: 

• Anger Management, Jesus Style by Kathy Collard Miller 
• No More Anger: Hope for An Out of Control Mom by Kathy Collard Miller
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Kathy Collard Miller:

Website / Facebook / Instagram / X

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Kathy Collard Miller (www.KathyCollardMiller.com) is the author of over 60 books including women’s Bible studies, a memoir, Christian living books and Bible commentaries. She is also a popular women’s conference speaker who has shared in over 30 US states and 9 foreign countries. She has been married to Larry for 55 years, is the mother of two and grandmother of two and lives in Boise, Idaho.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary: 

Have you ever prayed fervently for something for years, or even decades and began to doubt that God would answer your prayers? My guest on today’s episode is Bunny Yekzaman who prayed for over 20 years for her Muslim husband to receive God’s gift of salvation. Her journey took a powerful turn when she learned to pray in faith and release control to God’s timing. Thought it was a painful time in her life, Bunny shares how God redeemed that pain, bringing beautiful sacred scars in place of her painful wounds. 

Quotables from the episode:

• Sometimes we create wounds ourselves and we don’t even realize we are doing it.
• I was raised to not marry an unbeliever. I was told “don’t do this” or “don’t do that” but there was really no education as to why. But there are important principles in God’s word about why we shouldn’t be unequally yoked—it’s an element of protection that God puts around us if we will just obey his word.
• Sometimes we don’t really mean to disobey Him, but sometimes we just really don’t understand that that protection is coming from God.
• I knew not to marry an unbeliever, but I didn’t understand why. Was that really from God, or was that just another rule to follow?
• When I got into college, I met a man who was totally on the other side of the world from me. He was raised Muslim, raised in Iran, came here to go to school, denounced his beliefs, accepted the communist teaching and was teaching that in an undergraduate class at the college I attended. When they told me to stay away from him, it just made me want to run toward him.
• When I realized that I was a believer and he was an unbeliever, I began to think that maybe this was supposed to be my goal: to change this man so I spent 8 years trying to change him. We knew each other for eight months and then got married. Nobody said it would work, and it almost didn’t because I did step into a relationship unequally yoked.
• We think love is going to cure everything, but there is not true love where there isn’t a relationship with Christ.
• So maybe I had this deep abiding love for Jesus and for my husband, but my husband couldn’t understand that because he didn’t know the love of Christ.
• I went for years, trying to prove to him who Christ was and that he needed to know Jesus. I raised our children in the church, and it became a real battle because he began to believe that he was in competition with God.
• I realized that I had stepped outside of God’s will when I married him. I prayed and prayed for his salvation, and I learned how to love my husband with the love of Christ and not expect anything in return.
• He was a great husband and a great father in all other aspects, but it angered him that the children and I were praying for him and that I could have this confidence that when I died, I would go to heaven.
• In the Muslim faith there was an evidence of works in everything they did, so even though he denounced his faith, he couldn’t understand how the gift of eternal life was based on God’s grace.
• It took about 20 years of marriage before I really started seeing change. My children were on a mission trip, and I was at home, on my knees again praying for God to save my husband when I sensed a gentle voice in my spirit saying, “Bunny, don’t ask me again.” The Bible talks about being persistent in prayer, so I didn’t understand what God meant.
• There are three reasons why we often continue to plead with God to answer our prayers: 1) impatience, 2) wanting to be in control, and 3) not believing God for his answer.
• God was showing me that I was asking him for my husband’s salvation, but I wasn’t asking in faith—I was asking in doubt.
• We can have confidence when we pray. There is no shred of doubt that when we ask God according to his will, it will be done. But that means we have to know what his will is.
• If I’m praying for someone’s salvation, that’s God’s will. And if I believe that’s God’s will, and it is, then I can have a confident assurance that God is going to do what he said he is going to do. I can hold onto that promise and it changes the way I pray!
• After that, I stopped praying asking God to save my husband, and began praying, “Thank you God for saving my husband.” I’m thanking God for what he said he would do.
• He wants us to have faith. Faith isn’t believing after we see it, it’s believing before we see it.
• When I realized God’s word is true, I wasn’t trusting in me, I was trusting Him.
• Ultimately, my husband gave his life to Christ, he surrendered to the ministry, went to seminary, and has been the pastor at the nursing home where I work for three years now.
• Get out of God’s way. Get on your knees and thank God in advance for whatever it is you’re praying for, and trust him.
• Don’t pray with an agenda. Praying believing God will answer, but then surrender the how and the when to him. That way he gets the glory, but we get to witness God’s goodness and faithfulness.
• God has never and will never go back on a promise.
• If you stop getting into God’s word, that’s when the flesh takes over.  The flesh will start questioning and doubting when you aren’t studying God’s word.
• God’s word is where you will find the strength, the wisdom, the courage, the faith, and everything you need to push through your painful trial. The enemy will do everything he can to try to doubt God.
• Hold onto God’s promises. The only strength that you have is God’s word.
• The longer a tea bag stays in boiling water, the stronger that tea becomes. Likewise, the more we stay in God’s word, the stronger we become, not in our own strength but in His, so that when those trials come, we can stand steadfast on those promises we know.

Scripture References:

• 2 Corinthians 6:14 NIV “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”
• James 1:6 NIV “But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.”
• 2 Peter 3:9 NIV “The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.”
• 1 John 5:14-15 NIV “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.  And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.”
• Joshua 23:14 NIV "Now I am about to go the way of all the earth. You know with all your heart and soul that not one of all the good promises the LORD your God gave you has failed. Every promise has been fulfilled; not one has failed.”
• Philippians 4:19 NIV “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.”
• Genesis 50:20 NIV “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.”
• Philippians 4:6 NIV “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”

Recommended Resources: 

• Trusting God While Praying for Lost Loved Ones
• How to Maintain Hope While Waiting for the Salvation of a loved One –Your Hope Filled Perspective, Episode 167
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Bunny Zekzaman:

Website / Facebook / Instagram

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Bunny Yekzaman is a child of the King, a wife of over 40 years, mother of four & grandmother of many grandchildren  She is a disaster relief chaplain, and works as an Enrichment specialist for a nursing home. Her passion is sharing God’s love & truth with a faith in His faithfulness to His promises. She lives with hope for her lost family and friends and finds it her calling to pray in faith for them.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary: 

In this episode, author, speaker, and mother, Jodi Howe, shares the painful wounds she has gone through as she has parented a child with gender identity issues. She shares the wisdom that God has granted her in how to remain true to the gospel of Jesus Christ, but still love her daughter.  

Quotables from the episode:

• Often God uses our most painful experiences to minister to others.
• The ultimate way to glorify the Lord is to turn our pain into power.
• My testimonies come from experience with anxiety, divorce, and having a transgender child. But He equips, He leads, He walks alongside us, and I’m at the point now where I’m speaking from a healed scar, not a wound.
• I’ve gone through years of learning, growing, messing up, and trying to stay close to my faith in Christ and love my daughter through this.
• The thorn in my flesh came about ten years ago when my daughter told me she doesn’t like the skin that she is in and wants to transition into a male.
• I firmly believe that God does not mistakes and that the gender you are born in is the gender you are to live in. But that doesn’t mean that our children and the culture they live in don’t feel lost in who they are.
• In the course of a decade, not much has changed in her decision, but what has changed is how I approach it as a mom who is adamantly and passionately in love with Jesus Christ and is adamantly and passionately in love with my child.
• The Lord has shown me that I need to be open to what an agape love looks like, not just the love a mother to a child, but His love as spelled out in First Corinthians.
• God has shown me such incredible growth in this process.
• Gender identity issues is not being born in the wrong skin. This is actual societal pressure, infused by the internet, put upon lonely hearts and minds that are struggling just to get by at the times when they are the most vulnerable and the affirmations by doctors, therapists, teachers and educators who say if you want to be a duck, and act like a duck, we’re going to help you be a duck.
• Satan, through society, is really putting a stronghold on those vulnerabilities. But the good news is, God is prevailing through it as I knew He would, in my life, in my family’s life, and in my child’s life.
• You grow in Christ as fast as you are intentional about growing.
• I have been intentional from the day I accepted Jesus into my heart that I was going to build a life and a foundation on who He is, on His foundation. I am going to build my life around Him.
• These children are told that if your parents won’t let you be who you want to be, you need to threaten suicide or even attempt it so they will get on your bandwagon of transitional change in your body.
• 90% of transgender men and women are coming from a traumatic circumstance.
• It’s crucial to thoroughly vet the mental health therapists you go to for therapy.
• We don’t have agree or like the choices of our children. But when God says “love the Lord with all your strength, heart and soul, and love thy neighbor,” when we appreciate how much he loved us to send Jesus to die for our sins, we don’t get to love haphazardly—it is a full love of acceptance.
• What it has shown me is that I can love her alongside the struggles and the choices she has made. It has softened my heart to not feel as much shame, to not feel as much resentment, to not worry what people think of me…when I go to bed at night, I only care what God thinks of me.
• I believe that our omniscient God is going to be able to weave this into something beautiful.
• I know the Lord would want me to have a relationship with my child no matter what. I adore my child, and she is going to see how I, her mother who loves the Lord, is going to honor her. So there is going to be a lot of pressure on me to keep my Godly heart in check, and I’m willing to do it for the sake of my child, and most importantly, to glorify the Lord.
• You can stay a beautiful believer in Jesus Christ, believe that the gospels are real, and you can still love your LBGT family member but you can’t do it without God.
• God will show you. He will equip you, He will provide for you, and He will comfort your heart when it’s at the lowest of lows. He will speak to you, and He will give you the words to say that will speak love.
• We need to go to God and ask Him how to navigate this world.
• The only hill to die on is the one that Jesus tells me to die on, and so far, He has told me to keep going.
• Are we loving God’s people to life?
• Jesus keeps the door open, and I think He’s asking us to do the same thing.
• We often can’t help what happens to us, but we can take it to the Lord and we can trust that He’s weaving it and working it out for good.
• I’m trying very hard that regardless of what comes before me, before I react I pray; before I speak I pray. I take it to the Lord.
• Stop leaning on the world. It’s going to disappoint you. It’s going to hurt you. Take it to the Lord first and ask Him how he wants you to handle the situation with integrity as a friend, as a coworker, as a parent, as a child…we need to do what God tells us to do, but we have to be willing to listen first. 
• Wisdom from the Lord will never steer us wrong. That doesn’t mean it will always be comfortable, but it will not mislead. 
• God doesn’t care as much about our comfort as he cares about our character.
• When you walk with Christ, His favor is upon you. And when we walk in His favor, that makes us more attractive to those around us.

Scripture References:

• Matthew 13:6 NIV “But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root.”
• Romans 12:1-2 NIV “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. But do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Recommended Resources: 

• The Air That I Breathe: Hope and Healing from Anxiety (22 Day and Night Devotions) by Jodi Howe
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Jodi Howe:

Website

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Jodi Howe is an engaging stage performer, author, and award-winning podcaster known for her heartfelt messages and magnetic energy. She hosts "The Air That I Breathe," podcast and released a book of the same name last year, both inspired by her passion for sharing messages of hope through the gospel of Jesus. Based in Cary, North Carolina, Jodi inspires through her writing, music, and dedication to her family.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary: 

In this episode we continue the “Sacred Scar Story Series.” My guest, Georgia Shaffer, shares the pain of a broken engagement and what she thought that meant for her ministry and service to God. She shares the beautiful sacred scar that her wounds have produced, and how God is using her in the lives of others.

Quotables from the episode:

• Shame from the actions of another made me feel like there was “something wrong with me!” I felt like a fool, and believed I was unlovable.
• Because of the pain I went through, I was sure God would never use me again.
• Healing came when I got involved in a supportive community that helped me to focus on the truth of God’s word.
• I learned I had to take my focus off the pain, and place my full focus on God.
• Painful trials make us more powerful because we can relate to the suffering of others.
• When you’re in a painful trial that you had no control over, don’t isolate, take time to grief, and seek out a supportive community with whom you can process your pain.
• In my painful circumstances, I learned what God can do.
• Pain is an opportunity for growth.

Recommended Resources: 

• A Gift of Mourning Glories: Restoring Your Life After Loss by Georgia Shaffer 
• Taking Out Your Emotional Trash: Face Your Feelings and Build Healthy Relationships by Georgia Shaffer
• Avoiding the 12 Relationship Mistakes Women Make by Georgia Shaffer
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Georgia Shaffer:

Website / Membership / Facebook / X / Instagram

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Georgia Shaffer, is an author, PA licensed psychologist and a Professional Certified Coach. In 2023, the International Christian Coaching Association chose her as the Christian Coach of the Year. She has written 6 books including A Gift of Mourning Glories: Restoring Your Life after Loss and Taking Out Your Emotional Trash. Georgia offers individual and group coaching online including ReBUILD After Divorce https://georgiashaffer.com/rebuildmembership, a community for Christian women struggling to begin anew after a shattered marriage. www.georgiashaffer.com.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary: 

In this episode, Karen DeArmond Gardner opens up about the deep shame she experienced as a victim of domestic abuse in her thirty-year marriage. She shares the painful journey of living through abuse and the healing after abuse that transformed her life. Karen explains the key factors in her healing process, including how God replaced her pain and shame with sacred scars, giving her a powerful testimony of restoration and hope.

Quotables from the episode:

• Some of our greatest areas of ministry comes out of our greatest areas of pain.
• I survived a thirty-year abusive marriage. I’ve been out 19 years, and it’s easier for me to talk about now becomes there comes a time when there’s been enough healing that it’s more about remembering than reliving the experience that happened.
• I experienced force of control, the threat of violence to control, to manipulate, and to gaslight so I would do what he wanted, how and when he wanted.
• Often, domestic abuse doesn’t involve hitting.
• I believed as a Christian that God hates divorce, so I thought this was my cross to bear and that I was called to suffer through it for Jesus.
• I didn’t know I could leave. People often asked, “Why did you stay?” Because I didn’t know I could leave and I was terrified of my husband who was in law enforcement, and I knew his capabilities.
•  Instead of asking someone “why did you stay?” The better question is, “Why would he abuse his wife whom he supposedly loves?” Put it back on the one who caused the harm rather than the one who endured the harm.
• I didn’t want this to be my story. The shame was so powerful. I was a good Christian girl, so rather than share the shame of my story, I buried it. It was like putting a Band-Aid on a bullet wound and being unable to stop the bleeding.
• When I chose to leave, the aftermath was just as hard. Back then we didn’t have the resources that we have today. So there was the trauma of an abusive marriage, but then there was the aftermath in the healing.
• None of us would say “Oh I want to marry an abuser.” Being a Christ follower did not prevent me from experiencing abuse.
• When I left, shame covered me like a scratchy wool blanket and people could see it. I couldn’t look anyone in the eye and I didn’t want to be seen. When I realized no one wanted to know my story of pain, I internalized the shame and I put on a mask. You would see the absolute ugliness if I let you in, so I didn’t show you my real self.
• Shame has a look and a sound and how we behave. Shame affects how we talk and behave.
• Shame comes from the enemy and from the abuser. So, a lot of the shame we carry isn’t even ours.
• With His death, Jesus shamed the enemy with the cross. So, we can put the shame back on the enemy where it belongs.
• I changed churches over time and started attending a church where I was taught that I could heal from this experience.  For me, it started with reading “Mending the Soul.”
• About a decade later, I went through a period of grieving over something else and I realized I had never grieved my pain or losses before. That propelled my healing. So I always recommend grieving while you heal.
• God doesn’t have a cookie-cutter way of healing. If you can go to therapy, do that. Nothing gets wasted in your healing journey.
• In my healing journey, I realized who God really is, and who I really am.
• God says to call unto Him and He will come to us.
• Trauma is a liar. It distorts who God is. He is so much kinder, so much more loving, so much more gentle, but yet, God is a lion, He is my protector, He is my body guard.
• It is encountering God in those dark, painful places that we learn who God really is to us and for us.
• Frequently, the sacred scar that comes out of these painful wounds is greater intimacy with God, knowing Him deeper, it’s understanding the fullness of His character.
• Anger is part of the healing process. God can handle that anger! Anger is not the primary emotion—it’s the secondary. There is something else that is going on.

Scripture References:

• Romans 2:4 “It is the kindness of God that leads to repentance.”
• Isaiah 45:3 NIV “I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.”
• Ezekiel 34

Recommended Resources: 

• Hope for Healing from Domestic Abuse: Reaching for God’s Promise of Real Freedom by Karen DeArmond Gardner 
• When Healing After Domestic Abuse, God Will Meet You – Your Hope Filled Perspective, episode 120
• Leaving an Abusive Marriage Isn’t the End by Karen DeArmond Gardner
• Hope for Healing from Domestic Abuse – Your Hope Filled Perspective episode 119
• When to Leave an Abusive Relationship by Karen DeArmond Gardner
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Karen DeArmond Gardner:

Website / Facebook / Instagram / X

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Karen DeArmond Gardner is a certified advocate who provides emotional support for domestic abuse survivors. Walking with survivors in the aftermath of domestic, as they discover how to reframe what is normal and real as they process their pain and trauma. Learning how to move from hopelessness to hope and from death to life through mentoring and inner healing.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary: 

In this Sacred Scar Story, I chat with Carole Leathem, a mental health caregiver who founded a caregiving ministry after becoming the primary caregiver for her pastor husband who struggled with mental health issues, and later, her mother. Carole shares how she coped with the emotional impact of her caregiving journey, including the pain of being disqualified from ministry due to her husband's struggles. She opens up about the deep wounds she experienced and how God turned things around for good, transforming her scars into a powerful source of healing and service to others.

Quotables from the episode:

• So often our greatest areas of ministry come out of our greatest areas of pain and woundedness.
• I experienced physical, emotional, mental, relational, and spiritual wounds and it completely changed the trajectory of my life and ministry. My husband of many years was a pastor and woke up one morning experiencing anxiety that continued to worsen. By the end of 2016, the anxiety led to full blown depression. It kind of blindsided me because I had never been around anyone with such devastating anxiety or depression.
• Eventuallly, he became suicidal and had to go into a psychiatric hospital for seven days which created chaos and messiness in our lives. When the dust settled, he could no longer pastor or do his job resulting in his early retirement.
• I had a fulltime speaking ministry, but all of a sudden my speaking engagements began to cancel because somehow, his mental instability disqualified me in their eyes.
• Scars remind us that there was a pain, that there was an injury.
• I went from having an incredible life, to standing in a parking lot one night asking God, “God, what has happened to my life?”
• But I found God walking through it with me one step at a time. I found that he had put things into place for this season 20-25 years ago that I was going to need that day.
• The wound was so deep, and we didn’t know who was safe to talk about our pain. I’ve been through a lot, but this was probably the most pivotal turning point in my life.
• In my book, Sacred Scars, I (Dr. B) shared that I was raised by a mother who was depressed my entire childhood and then I experienced severe clinical depression. I feared that that would disqualify me from my work in mental health. But what I found was that experience made me much more compassionate and empathic toward others, and my patients and readers could tell that I truly understand them because I had experienced it myself.
• I had already found freedom from having been raised by an alcoholic father and a narcissistic, abusive mother, but when you go through something so catastrophic, like I did with my husband, it triggered all the thoughts about not being good enough, who do you think you are, and now what do I do?
• Immediately I got into Scripture because I knew that if I didn’t stay grounded in God’s Word, those lies were going to destroy me. I needed to be strong not only for myself but for my husband, and I needed to go where the absolute truth was.
• I said to God, “Even if I never stand on a platform or teach the Bible again, I know it’ll be okay because you are in this with me.”
• When a crisis hits, we have to already know what we believe because that is what we will fall back on. We can’t wait until a crisis hits to determine what we believe because in a crisis we are more likely to react than to respond, if we don’t have a firm foundation based on truth.

Scripture References:

• James 1:2-4 MSG “Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.”

Recommended Resources: 

•  Self-Care for Caregivers – Your Hope Filled Perspective episode 168
• 10 Scriptures of Encouragement for Caregivers
• Hope and Help for How to Avoid Caregiver Burnout – Your Hope Filled Perspective episode 12
• Caring for the Caregiver
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Carole Leathem:

Website / Podcast / Book / Instagram / Facebook

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Carole Leathem is a speaker, teacher, author, storyteller, podcaster, and encourager, and she has been speaking at women’s retreats and teaching Bible studies for over thirty years. She is a certified mental health coach, professional life coach, and a spiritual formation coach.

Carole is passionate about sharing her story with those God puts in her life and loves spending time with her 7 grandchildren.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

Episode Summary: 

This week’s guest on the Sacred Scar Story Series, Barb Roose, faced prejudice from early childhood. This led to her believing she was never enough and compensating by trying to “outperform her race.” She shares her story, and how she found healing, and God’s peace. 

Quotables from the episode:

• I love the message that God can use all things because when we’re in deep pain, that’s the opposite of what we’re thinking: that the pain becomes a limiting factor in our lives.
• In my particular story, this idea of wounding actually happened even before I recognized it. In kindergarten, there was just something about me that my kindergarten teacher didn’t like. I came to find out later on that it was because of my skin color.
• When I was five years old, I received a very strong, palpable message: before that it was my parents and family and I was surrounded by love, belonging, and acceptance, but when I went out into the world, my kindergarten teacher sent me the message that I was not enough; there was something intrinsically wrong with me.
• When I was in high school, I found my kindergarten report card and my teacher had written that “Barbara will struggle in life and won’t amount to much.”
• At an early age, even before I knew that there was a wound, something opened up inside of me and I spent a lot of my spiritual journey working to out-perform my race.
• As life would go on, I lived in a community that was more than 99% Caucasian, which was not me, so there were many points when that wound would reopen.
• I recognized the blessing that God gave me parents and family who would show me unconditional love and I recognize that not everyone gets that. But in my case, that helped the wound not grow exponentially. I’ve seen many people from diverse communities where that wound keeps opening and deepening.
• Throughout my entire life I tried to heal that wound with performance. Couple that with a faith-based community that was a little more legalistic and add that to competition in a very competitive school environment and that set me up later in life to have other family difficulties like addiction issues and my divorce, where some of the themes of my past wounds would be repeated and meant that God needed to do a lot of healing.
• Often, some of the wounds that are the most painful start in childhood before we know who we are in Christ, before we can recognize that there is another voice that whispers to us. Because it happens when we are so young, it becomes entrenched, and we continue to carry those lies into other situations. That’s the enemy’s M.O. in that he will always go back to where he was effective in our lives before.
• Fast-forward 40 years later from that 5-year-old girl to 45-year-old me when I was in the midst of a divorce after 26 years of marriage. This was not a place I ever thought I would be. I had been on staff at a church for many years, was an author and a speaker for many years, and I loved Jesus when a significant portion of my life was ending. I went 8 years trying to hold on to a marriage where addiction was running rampant in a spouse who was struggling and who eventually left.
• All of those performance issues and trying to do the very best that I could in my capacity, on March 11, 2019, I literally crawled up the steps to my third floor apartment after my divorce hearing, and I laid in bed for 3 days. I was so overwhelmed with the trauma of it all that I lost the ability to speak. I could text but not speak.
• Just because we love Jesus and are walking with Jesus does not mean that life does not get overwhelming.
• In that season of life, I had to reform a part of my identity in Christ. I knew that I was deeply loved by God. I knew that he was with me and for me. But I had lost a significant part of myself in the brokenness of my family and who I thought I was and who I would be from that moment on.
• A friend encouraged me to pray and ask God for a new name. I had been Mrs. Roose for 26 years. As I prayed over the next month, God gave me a phrase that constituted my new name: “You are God’s beautiful, loveable, capable daughter. You are confident in Christ, and you are worthy of God’s best.”
• If you follow after Christ, you are going to participate in suffering. You are going to go through stuff, but God can and will redeem it.
• Healing began years before in a healing journey. The evidence of healing took a while, but I had the opportunity to work with great Christian counselors on things in me that I knew weren’t where God wanted me to be. So that healing journey began about 7-8 years before the divorce.
• During the pandemic, I was divorced and an empty nester all within six months. I had lost my father, my father-in-law and my husband all within one year.
• But one spring day, I sensed God whisper “I have restored what the locusts have eaten.” And in that, I realized I had the perfect peace of God.
• As a Christian woman, the “scarlet D” for divorce is something that is like a 1,000-pound heavy weight. That weight of shame was so deep and as I began talking with other friends who had been through similar experiences, there was a compassion that I began to develop.
• For me to let go of the shame meant clinging to the promises of God’s truth because Satan was using that “scarlet D” as a sword.
• I began doing something called “God Morning; God Night.” I began doing this during my alcoholism years. Alcohol walked in my door at 7am every morning so when I first woke up, I had to deal with the effects of alcoholism first thing in the morning. So, I began repeating 5 promises of God to myself before I put my feet on the floor. Later on, I would tape that note card on my bathroom mirror so I would steal myself to God’s promises. That was a slow march, every day believing the promises of God and repeating them until the whisper of shame faded away.
• The ABC’s of the wilderness season:
  • A: Always believe God loves you
  • B: Believe God’s promises for you
  • C: Challenge yourself to surrender and let go of what you can’t control
• Surrender really is the path of peace. God’s got it, and it may not look like it, but the reality is that he is able to do immeasurably more than we could ask or imagine. When we let go and release our circumstances to God, we need and receive his peace and his power to get through it.

Scripture References:

• Joel 2:25 NIV “I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten—the great locust and the young locust, the other locusts and the locust swarm—my great army that I sent among you.”

Recommended Resources: 

• Stronger Than Stress: 10 Spiritual Practices to Win the Battle of Overwhelm by Barb Roose 
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson 
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms  
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Barb Roose:

Website / Book / Facebook / X / Instagram

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Barb Roose is a popular speaker and author who is passionate about teaching women to live beautifully strong and courageous in spite of their fears so that they can experience God’s great adventure of faith and purpose for their lives. Since 2005, Barb has been speaking to audiences in the US and abroad, including national platforms such as the Aspire Women’s Events, She Speaks Conference, and the UMC Leadership Institute. She’s a Bible teacher who loves following God more than anything else in life. Barb makes God’s Word come alive through powerful teaching, personal stories and practical next steps. Audiences love her authenticity and humor. Barb is a real woman who has experienced depression and anxiety, parenting challenges, family addiction trauma and long seasons of walking by faith in unanswered prayer. Rather than teaching audiences to follow God to get what they want, Barb inspires audiences to discover that God is all they need!

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson