Counselor Toolbox Podcast with DocSnipes

1059-Overcoming the scars of ACEs and parental alienation

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Parental Alienation Defined

  • Parental alienation is not abandonment or protecting a child from abuse; it is a form of psychological abuse.
  • It involves a deliberate campaign of denigration, brainwashing, and manipulation of the child to reject the other parent.

    • Alienating Behaviors

    • Alienation occurs when one parent actively manipulates a child against the other parent, which can be unconscious or conscious.
    • These behaviors involve brainwashing, manipulating, or lying to the child, often supported by family members or other influential figures in the child’s life.

      • The Impact on Children

      • Parental alienation disrupts children’s primary attachment bonds, causing deep psychological harm.
      • Children may develop symptoms like Stockholm syndrome, where they begin to rationalize the alienating parent’s behavior and vilify the targeted parent.

        • Alienation as an Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE)

        • Parental alienation is considered psychological abuse, one of the categories of ACEs.
        • It often coexists with other forms of trauma, such as witnessing abuse of the targeted parent, resulting in compounded trauma.

          • Long-term Psychological and Physical Effects

          • The chronic stress of alienation can lead to developmental delays, emotional dysregulation, autoimmune issues, and sleep disturbances.
          • Alienated children often exhibit hypervigilance, impulsivity, and distorted thinking patterns, which affect their relationships and behavior in adulthood.

            • Types of Alienating Parents

            • Alienating parents may have their own psychological issues, including codependency, narcissistic tendencies, antisocial traits, or borderline personality disorder.
            • They often manipulate children out of their fear of rejection, unresolved trauma, or a need to control.

              • Interventions for Healing

              • Interventions include creating a sense of safety for the child, addressing internalized negative beliefs, and helping the child develop secure attachments.
              • Therapy should focus on grieving the loss of the parental relationship and addressing guilt from the manipulation.


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                Counselor Toolbox Podcast with DocSnipesBy Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes
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