Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

#1197 - When Your Child Has No School Friends


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When your child says they hate school and have no friends, what really works? Discover why building friendships takes 200 hours of intentional time, and learn practical strategies from hosting craft days to finding 'third spaces'. Plus, understand the two key relationships that create true school belonging and why sometimes the best friendships might not be with peers at all.

Quote of the Episode: "Friends don't usually land in our lap—they require intention and time."

Key Insights:

  • Close friendships require 200+ hours of intentional time
  • School belonging needs two key relationships
  • Third spaces beyond home and school are crucial
  • Adult friendships can be valuable for children
  • Structured activities help build new friendships
  • Medical and psychological checks may be needed
  • School relationships often need parental facilitation
  • Quality family time remains foundational

Resources Mentioned:

  • Jeffrey Hall's friendship research from the University of Kansas 
  • School belonging research
  • Happy Families

Action Steps for Parents:

  1. Facilitate Intentional Friend Time
    • Organise structured activities
    • Create regular playdates
    • Use third spaces effectively
  2. Work with Schools
    • Identify potential friend matches
    • Build teacher relationships
    • Focus on school belonging
  3. Consider Broader Solutions
    • Explore adult mentoring
    • Check medical factors
    • Strengthen family connections

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Dr Justin Coulson's Happy FamiliesBy Dr Justin Coulson

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