🎂 The birthday invite never came — and the heartbreak broke us both. Because when your kid is excluded, you carry that wound too.

In this raw confession, Jane shares the reality of parenting a child who’s left out. From the quiet “Mum, what’s wrong with me?” to the fury of watching friendships collapse despite scaffolding, this episode validates the pain of social exclusion for ADHD and autistic kids — and the mums who love them.

Research shows exclusion isn’t resilience-building. It’s trauma. The brain registers it as real pain, and for neurodivergent kids, it happens far too often .

• The gut-punch moment when a child realises they weren’t invited
• Why “kids toughening up” isn’t resilience — it’s trauma
• How hidden friendship rules and conditional inclusion leave ADHD/autistic kids on the edge
• The impact of social exclusion on children’s confidence, self-esteem, and nervous system
• Why mums feel grief, rage, and helplessness when scaffolding still fails
• Practical ways to validate kids, script social supports, and work with schools for inclusion

• Your child has come home asking “Why don’t they like me?”
• You’ve hosted playdates, scaffolded friendships, and still watched your child get left out
• You’ve been told “that’s just life” and felt unseen or dismissed
• You want language and strategies to support a child who’s socially excluded
• You need solidarity: proof you’re not alone in this heartbreak

• 📑 Research: Social exclusion activates the same brain regions as physical pain
• 📘 Playground Pickup Guide for ADHD Mums
• 🎧 Related Episode: Raising Strong Children: How to Support Without Always Solving Their Problems with Emma Rose — Spotify | Apple Podcasts

✨ Listen now: “CONFESSION: My Kid Didn’t Get Invited — And It Broke Both Our Hearts” — available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and adhdmums.com.au — because no ADHD mum should be left to carry this heartbreak in silence.

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ADHD kids social exclusion, ADHD birthday party invites, ADHD mums heartbreak, autism exclusion at school, ADHD friendship struggles, ADHD emotional resilience, neurodivergent kids left out, supporting ADHD children’s friendships, parenting ADHD kids social skills, ADHD school inclusion

⚠️ Content warning: This episode contains a brief discussion of suicidal ideation at 17mins.

🚛 You survived pregnancy. You survived newborn chaos. You survived years of exhaustion.

Then perimenopause hit — and it felt like your ADHD exploded overnight.

If perimenopause has made your ADHD feel impossible — you’re not broken, and you’re definitely not the only one.

In this raw and relatable episode, Jane sits down with Dr. Sunita Chelva (Hero Menopause & Women’s Health) to unpack what happens when fluctuating hormones collide with ADHD brains. From brain fog and rage to misdiagnosis and burnout, this conversation shines a light on what women are really experiencing — and why it’s not “just Mum life.”

• How estrogen and progesterone shifts in perimenopause impact dopamine and ADHD symptoms
• Why burnout, brain fog, rage, and emotional reactivity spike in the late 30s–50s
• The overlap between ADHD and PMDD — and why up to 70% of ADHD women are affected
• Why women are often offered antidepressants instead of hormone support
• How masking, multitasking, and guilt fuel emotional depletion
• Red flags when seeking help — and why you may need second or third opinions
• Practical steps: symptom tracking, seeking hormone-aware providers, and building support

• You feel like your ADHD has worsened in perimenopause
• You’ve experienced brain fog, rage, exhaustion, or guilt that doesn’t feel like “just Mum life”
• You’ve been told to try antidepressants but suspect hormones are playing a role
• You want to understand why PMDD and perimenopause hit ADHD women so hard
• You need validation, language, and next steps to advocate for yourself

• Dr. Sunita Chalva — Hera Menopause & Women’s Health
• Hero Menopause Symptom Scorer - https://www.heramenopause.com.au/herasymptomscore
• Australasian Menopause Society — symptom tracking tools
• ADHD Mums Recommended Provider Tool — find GPs & specialists who understand ADHD + hormones
• Suggest your own Women’s Health Provider if you have had a good experience. https://form.jotform.com/242630327577863

• 🎧 The Perimenopause Crash — Progesterone, Stress, and the Rage Nobody Warned Us About
• 🎧 HRT, ADHD & Perimenopause: What No One’s Explaining to Women
• 🎧 Histamine + Hormones — Why You Feel Like You’re Falling Apart

✨ Listen now: HORMONES: When Hormones Hijack the Mind — ADHD, Perimenopause & Emotional Burnout — available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and adhdmums.com.au — because hormones may hijack your brain, but they don’t get to define your life — and you deserve support that actually works.

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

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ADHD mums aren’t lazy — our homes just weren’t designed with our brains in mind. And no, piles aren’t proof of failure. In this episode, Jane unpacks why traditional “Pinterest-perfect” organising systems fail neurodivergent families, and how to design a home that actually supports ADHD working memory. From intentional landing zones to open storage, these ADHD-friendly hacks help you stop fighting your environment and start building scaffolding that works with your brain.

• Why ADHD brains struggle with “out of sight, out of mind” systems
• How object permanence and visual cues shape daily life for ADHD mums
• Why Pinterest-worthy storage often fails in real homes
• ADHD-friendly hacks: open storage, intentional landing zones, pairing items with habits
• How “piles” aren’t laziness — they’re often functional reminder systems
• Why the bare minimum is still a miracle when you’re parenting with ADHD — and why that doesn’t make you messy, it makes you resourceful

• You’ve ever re-bought something from Kmart because you forgot you already owned it
• You feel like you’re drowning in clutter but can’t stick to “minimalist” systems
• You’ve tried every Pinterest hack and still end up with piles everywhere
• You’re tired of being told you’re lazy or messy when you’re actually adapting to how your brain works
• You want practical home design tips that are ADHD-friendly and realistic for mums

• Barkley, R. A. What are the long-term health implications of ADHD? This paper/report covers how ADHD increases risks for poorer health outcomes and reduces life expectancy if untreated. ADHDAwarenessMonth 2025
• Tuckman, A. Wasting Time? Hyperfocusing? ADHD and Time Perception Problems (ADDitude, 2025) — explains how ADHD distorts time perception (time blindness), impacting productivity, relationships, self-esteem

✨ Listen now: “I’m Not Lazy — My House Just Doesn’t Have a Memory” — available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and adhdmums.com.au.

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

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Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

❌ “Not disabled enough.” ❌ “Not lifelong.”

If you’ve ever been told your child is “not disabled enough” for support — you’re not alone. And you’re not failing them.

That’s what too many families are hearing through NDIS reforms — while kids who mask or “hold it together” risk losing the supports that keep households afloat. This episode unpacks what the changes actually mean, where the gaps are, and how to push back with lived experience at the centre.

• What “not disabled enough” and “not lifelong” decisions look like on the ground for ADHD and autistic families
• How NDIS reviews measure parental burnout instead of real need
• Why kids who mask (or parents who try to stay positive in reviews) can be penalised
• Senator Jordon Steele-John’s lived experience with ADHD and disability advocacy
• What the proposed Thriving Kids program could mean — and the unanswered questions
• How parents can use advocacy, templates, and submissions to push back

• Your child has been told they’re “not disabled enough” or “not lifelong” for NDIS
• You’ve felt crushed by reviews that demand proof of struggle before support
• You’re scared your child’s ability to mask will cost them the help they need
• You’re trying to make sense of the new Thriving Kids program
• You want to hear from a politician with both lived experience and a plan to fight back

• NDIS Free Resources → (guides, templates, and jotforms to help parents navigate the changes)
• NDIS Jot form - document your experience
• Parliamentary Inquiry into the NDIS — open for submissions now
• Full webpage of all Jane's NDIS advocacy work here

• 🎧 NDIS is making psychology support harder to access and the new budget rules: Spotify | Apple Podcast

✨ Listen now: Not Disabled Enough — The NDIS Changes Every Parent Needs to Hear (with Senator Jordon Steele-John) — on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and adhdmums.com.au — because parents deserve support, not shame.

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

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Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

⚠️ This episode discusses disassociation and trauma responses. Please listen with care and step away if needed

🧘‍♀️ Meditation apps promised calm — but for many ADHD mums, stillness doesn’t soothe. It shuts us down.

If you’ve ever sat down to meditate and felt panic instead of peace — you’re not broken. You’re not the only one.

In this Quick Reset, Jane explores why meditation, yoga, and “just breathe” advice can trigger dissociation instead of relaxation. When stillness feels unsafe, your nervous system isn’t failing — it’s protecting you.

This episode unpacks the difference between resistance and survival, why dissociation is often misunderstood, and how ADHD mums can build regulation in ways that actually feel safe.

• Why meditation and stillness can trigger dissociation instead of calm
• Dissociation as a neurological survival response, not a mindset issue
• How it shows up in kids (zoning out, robot-like compliance, emotional flatness)
• Why “letting go” feels impossible without safety and scaffolding
• Practical alternatives: movement, sensory tools, music, micro-pauses
• How to reframe meditation as presence, curiosity, and building tolerance slowly

• You’ve ever felt panic, not peace, when trying meditation
• You blame yourself for failing at yoga, mindfulness, or “relaxing”
• You want to understand dissociation as survival, not weakness
• You’re raising a neurodivergent child who zones out or seems “not present” at school
• You need validating, practical strategies that meet ADHD brains where they are

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk — on trauma, the body, and survival states

✨ Listen now: “No, I Can’t Meditate. I’m Too Busy Disassociating” — available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and adhdmums.com.au — because calm shouldn’t feel unsafe, and you deserve tools that actually work for your brain.

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

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Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

⚠️ Content Warning

This episode contains discussion of eating disorders, food restriction, and medical trauma, including misdiagnosis, inpatient treatment, and NG tube feeding. These themes may be triggering if you’ve experienced eating disorders, hospitalisation, or trauma in medical settings. Please listen with care and step away if you need to.

🥄 Your child isn’t “picky.” They’re hungry, terrified — and too often, the world still blames parents.

In this raw and validating episode, Jane speaks with Marie Camin, autistic clinical psychologist and researcher, about ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder), eating disorders, and why neurodivergent bodies are consistently misunderstood and mistreated.

Marie shares her own lived experience alongside her clinical insights, unpacking how trauma, sensory needs, medical neglect, and stigma collide to create deeper harm — and why curiosity, agency, and neuro-affirming care are essential for healing.

What We Cover in This Episode

• The difference (and overlap) between ARFID, anorexia, and other eating disorders
• Why ARFID is misdiagnosed and why body image isn’t the driver
• Marie’s lived experience: being mislabelled with anorexia, medical trauma, and refeeding through an NG tube
• How restriction cycles worsen when safe foods are lost
• The role of sensory overload, anxiety, and co-occurring health conditions (POTS, MCAS, celiac)
• Why dieticians, trauma-informed care, and curiosity matter more than control
• Reframing progress: eating “enough” vs eating “everything”
• Identity, food, and family culture — and why pressure around mealtimes backfires

This Episode Is For You If…

• You’re parenting a child with ARFID, “extreme picky eating,” or food refusal
• You’ve been blamed or dismissed by professionals who don’t understand neurodivergent feeding differences
• You’ve experienced medical trauma tied to eating or food treatment
• You want to understand how trauma, sensory needs, and stigma intersect with eating disorders
• You need solidarity and language that validates your lived experience

References & Resources Mentioned

• Marie Camin’ website: https://www.mariecamin.com/ 
• Hermeneutical Injustice — concept by philosopher Miranda Fricker on the harm of missing language for lived experience

Related ADHD Mums Episodes

• Could it be ARFID? Spotting the Signs + Why It’s Not Just Fussy Eating
• Beyond ‘Picky Eating’ — What ARFID Feels Like: Claire Britton’s Personal Story
• You’ve Tried Everything… They Still Won’t Eat: Real Strategies for ARFID at Home
• Navigating Psychology Assessments: Avoiding Key Mistakes

If you’re struggling, you don’t have to go through it alone. In Australia, you can call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or the Butterfly Helpline on 1800 33 4673. If you’re outside Australia, please reach out to local crisis supports in your area.

🎧 Listen now: ARFID, Eating Disorders & the Neurodivergent Body: What We Got Wrong — on Spotify, Apple, or adhdmums.com.au

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

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Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

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MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

🤔 Are school holidays not what you imagined? You thought they’d be fun — but instead you’re tired, burnt out, and blaming yourself for not enjoying them.

In this Quick Reset, Jane unpacks the hidden truth about parenting through school holidays with ADHD: not all mums start the day with the same energy budget. When you’re managing sensory overload, executive dysfunction, picky eating, or kids who refuse playdates, you’re spending double the energy before lunch. This isn’t failure. It’s maths that makes sense to ADHD mums .

What We Cover in This Episode

• Why school holidays feel impossible when ADHD mums start the day in energy deficit
• The “energy accounting” metaphor vs spoon theory — and why it finally explains burnout
• Real-life examples: Woolies meltdowns, kids refusing playdates, ARFID challenges
• How sibling fights, meal prep, and simple errands cost double for ADHD parents
• Why the comparison trap is a lie — different baselines, same marathon
• Practical survival strategies: connection anchors, boredom boards, and saying no without guilt

This Episode Is For You If…

• You’ve felt guilty for not “making memories” during school holidays
• You’ve compared yourself to other mums and thought you were failing
• Your kids refuse outings, playdates, or even to leave the house
• You’re managing ADHD, autism, ARFID, or high sensory needs on top of daily parenting
• You want to see burnout for what it is: biology, not bad parenting

📘 FREE Handout on Energy Accounting & Fighting Mum Burnout: Download HERE.

References & Resources Mentioned

• Spoon Theory and Energy Accounting — metaphors for invisible energy budgets
• Dr Devon Price — research on burnout and resilience
• Maggie Dent — on boredom, boys, and creativity

Related ADHD Mums Episodes

• The ADHD Mum’s Guide to Surviving School Mornings Without Tears (Theirs or Yours)
• The Hallway Hook That Saved My Sanity

🎧 Listen now: QUICK RESET: The Biggest Lie Parents Believe During School Holidays — on Spotify, Apple, or adhdmums.com.au

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

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Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

⚡ Sticker charts, punishments, time-outs — most ADHD mums have tried them. And most of us have felt the gut-punch of guilt when they “don’t work.” But here’s the truth: what looks like “bad behaviour” is usually a dysregulated nervous system asking for help, not a child trying to make life harder .

In this episode, Jane speaks with psychologist Leanne Tran about why conventional behaviour strategies fail ADHD kids, how shame sneaks in, and what parents can do instead. Together, they reframe “naughtiness” as communication — and offer practical tools for scaffolding, connection, and regulation .

• Why ADHD behaviour challenges are about regulation, not defiance
• The limits of sticker charts and why they often backfire
• Punishment vs reinforcement: why one creates shame, the other builds skills
• How to support kids before chaos — scaffolding, structure, and skill-building
• Quick-win strategies for meltdowns: novelty, humour, and breaking stress loops
• Boundaries vs values: why flexibility matters when ADHD is in the mix
• Why behaviour isn’t a reflection of your parenting — and how to drop the shame

• You’ve spent money on sticker charts, pens, and rewards — only to feel like you failed when they didn’t work
• You’re sick of judgment from schools, family, or strangers about your child’s behaviour
• You want alternatives to punishment that don’t just pile on shame
• You struggle with consistency yourself and feel guilty for not “parenting perfectly”
• You need tools that actually work for ADHD kids — and for ADHD mums who can’t parent like robots

1. Leanne Tran’s Website → https://www.leannetran.com.au
2. Follow Leanne on Instagram → @leannetranpsychology
3. Free resources → learn.leannetran.com.au/free
4. Lean’s Upcoming Webinar: Next steps for parents of neurodivergent kids - 10th of every month at 7pm
5. Psychoeducation Courses (50% off with code ADHDMUMS):

• Supporting Your ADHD Primary Schooler
• Supporting Your ADHD Teenager

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

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Meal planning was built for neurotypicals. That’s why it breaks ADHD mums.

In this Quick Reset, Jane calls out the shame trap of “just get organised” and explains why meal planning feels impossible when it demands six executive functions at once. From frozen meat to kids refusing everything you bought, this episode offers ADHD-friendly hacks for surviving dinner when you’re already on the edge .

• Why meal planning is an executive function overload, not laziness
• The invisible cost: six domains firing at once — predict, remember, plan, shop, cook, clean
• Why “future you” can’t be trusted to follow perfect systems
• How to design a “burnout menu” for your worst days
• Theme nights, breakfast-for-dinner, and recurring online orders as ADHD-friendly tools
• Why bubble baths don’t fix brain fog — but survival food does

• You hate meal planning, cooking, or even thinking about food
• You keep forgetting key ingredients or end up with “nothing to cook” after shopping
• Your kids’ picky eating, ARFID, or sensory issues make one-meal-fits-all impossible
• You feel guilty for not sticking to meal plans
• You want hacks that actually work on burnout days, not Pinterest fantasy boards

Claim: “Meal planning reduces executive function load, supports emotional regulation, and creates predictability for ADHD households — especially when meals are visually structured, repetitive, and simplified.”

Executive Function and Planning Impairments in ADHD

• Barkley, R. A., & Murphy, K. R. (2006). Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: A Clinical Workbook (3rd ed.).
• Highlights impairments in planning, organisation, and future thinking in ADHD adults and families. Recommends routines and external structures for managing daily demands.

Decision Fatigue and ADHD

• Baumeister, R. F., et al. (2008). Ego Depletion: Is the Active Self a Limited Resource? Journal of Consumer Research, 36(4), 543–556.
• Explains how repeated decision-making (like “What’s for dinner?”) leads to emotional exhaustion and poor impulse control — especially in people with existing cognitive load issues.

Routine and Predictability Reduce Stress

• Pelham, W. E., Fabiano, G. A. (2008). Evidence-Based Psychosocial Treatments for Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder. Journal of Clinical Child & Adolescent Psychology, 37(1), 184–214.
• Shows that structured routines like planned meals and consistent eating times reduce behavioural stress in ADHD children.

Visual and Repetitive Meal Systems Help ADHD Households

• Tuckman, A. R. (2009). More Attention, Less Deficit: Success Strategies for Adults with ADHD.
• Recommends simplifying meals, using visual lists or repeating favourite foods to limit overwhelm and improve follow-through in ADHD adults.

Link Between Blood Sugar Stability, Nutrition, and Emotional Regulation

• Benton, D., & Donohoe, R. T. (1999). The Effects of Nutrients on Mood. Public Health Nutrition, 2(3a), 403–409.
• Stable meals reduce mood swings and emotional volatility — crucial for ADHD individuals who are more sensitive to blood sugar fluctuations.

Dr Sharon Saline’s research — on ADHD working memory and “if-then” fatigue

🎧 Listen now: QUICK RESET:   Mum hack meal planning for when you're already burnt out. — on Spotify, Apple, or adhdmums.com.au

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

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Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

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MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

Night sweats, meltdowns, migraines, brain fog — and still dismissed as “mum stress.” For ADHD women, perimenopause isn’t weakness — it’s biology colliding with a system that refuses to notice.

In this episode, Jane speaks with Dr Lara Briden, naturopathic doctor and author of Hormone Repair Manual, to unpack what perimenopause really looks like for ADHD women, why blood tests often come back “normal,” and how body-identical hormone therapy can help.

• Why blood tests often miss perimenopause — and why “normal” doesn’t mean well
• How ADHD and hormones collide to intensify brain fog, rage, and sleep problems
• The role of histamine, thyroid, and iron in brain fog and exhaustion
• What HRT actually is — body-identical vs synthetic hormones
• Why antidepressants are over-prescribed when perimenopause is misdiagnosed
• Practical survival tools: progesterone, circadian rhythm resets, and magnesium — because bubble baths don’t fix brain fog
• Why perimenopause is puberty 2.0 — a transition, not a failure

• You’re over 37 and struggling with new rage, brain fog, or sleep issues
• You’ve been told your blood tests are “normal,” but you feel broken
• You’ve been dismissed with antidepressants when your body was screaming hormones
• You’re curious about how HRT interacts with ADHD and stimulants
• You want validation that perimenopause isn’t hysteria — it’s biology in transition

• Perimenopause Symptom Tracker – Free self-check to see if what you’re experiencing might be perimenopause. Download here →
• Perimenopause ADHD Brain Fog Kit – Practical tools for mums dealing with brain fog, memory slips, and hormone chaos. Find it here

• Dr Lara Briden website: https://www.larabriden.com/ 
• Hormone Repair Manual — Lara’s book on navigating perimenopause:
• Lara Briden’s guide to natural treatment ideas for premenstrual mood symptoms: larabriden.com/top-6-natural-treatments-for-premenstrual-mood-symptoms
• Insights from Dr Jerilynn Prior in the final bonus session of The Hormone Whisperers: tanyaborowski.com/shop/p/the-hormone-whisperers-may25-recordings

• The Perimenopause Crash — Progesterone, Stress, and the Rage Nobody Warned Us About
• Histamine + Hormones: Why You Feel Like You’re Falling Apart

🎧 Listen now: HORMONES: HRT, ADHD & Perimenopause — What No One’s Explaining to Women — on Spotify, Apple, or adhdmums.com.au

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

FOLLOW FOR MORE:

Get daily tips, insights, and relatable content for ADHD mums by following me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok or YouTube

LEAVE A REVIEW:

Love this episode? Your review means everything! It helps other mums find this content and feel supported. Let’s spread the word and make a difference together.

COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.