ADHD Mums

33. CONFESSIONS: I Don’t Always Like Being a Parent


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Sometimes parenting feels like being pecked to death by tiny, unstable chickens. We love our kids fiercely — but that doesn’t mean we have to love every single moment of raising them.

In this unfiltered Quick Reset, Jane says the thing so many ADHD mums are scared to admit out loud: I don’t always like being a parent. And no — that doesn’t make you a bad mum. It makes you human.

From the endless to-do lists and medical appointments to the sensory overload and invisible labour, parenting as a neurodivergent mum is a full-body, full-time emotional marathon. And when you’re doing it without enough support, it’s no wonder your nervous system is running in the red.

Jane breaks down the science of parental burnout, the myths that make mums feel guilty for struggling, and the quiet ways we can reclaim honesty, capacity, and space — without toxic positivity or pretending everything’s fine.

💬 In this episode, we cover:

  • Why it’s normal to feel touched-out, overstimulated, and over it
  • The clinical research on parental burnout — especially for ADHD mums
  • How gratitude and burnout can coexist (and why ‘but you chose this’ is unhelpful)
  • Scripts for asking for space — with or without telling the truth
  • Why emotional honesty helps our kids more than pretending to be happy

💭 This episode is for you if:
– You’ve ever thought, I can’t do this for one more second — and then kept going anyway
– You’re tired of feeling guilty for not loving every moment of motherhood
– You want permission to name the hard stuff without fear of judgment

📥 Add your own anonymous confession:
👉 https://form.jotform.com/251238072679867

🔗  References

Parental Burnout (2021 Study)  - A clinical study found that 12.9% of parents met clinical levels of parental burnout, with symptoms most common in mothers—especially those with perfectionism, neurodivergence, or low social support.

Regret in Parenthood (2015 Study, British Parents) - Research revealed that 8% of British parents regret having children, highlighting how unprepared many were for the realities of parenting.

Torn in Two: The Experience of Maternal Ambivalence by Rozsika Parker - This book explores how it is completely normal to love your child while disliking aspects of motherhood, offering a compassionate look at maternal ambivalence.

Unequal Care Work (2022 Study on Heterosexual Households) - A recent study showed that women in heterosexual households do 2.5x more unpaid care work than men, often paired with feelings of guilt for not fully enjoying it.

JOIN THE COMMUNITY:

Have questions or want to connect with other ADHD mums? Join our supportive Facebook group here and dive into the conversation. No question is too small, and I love answering in a group format!

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LEAVE A REVIEW:

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COLLABS:

For collaborations or speaking engagements, email me at [email protected].

MORE RESOURCES:

Still unsure if ADHD or autism applies to you or your child? Take my recommended self-tests here.

Topics covered in this episode:
ADHD mums, parental burnout, parenting shame, invisible load, executive dysfunction, emotional honesty, sensory overwhelm, overstimulation, parental regret, perfectionism, trauma triggers, motherhood myths, parenting capacity, neurodivergent parenting, chronic stress, guilt cycles, self-compassion, scripts for space, toxic positivity.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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ADHD MumsBy Jane McFadden

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