Owning Your Sexual Self

125. The Erotic Blueprints


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I am so excited, I’ve had this topic slated on my to-do list for episodes, The Erotic Blueprints. Even though I am not a certified Erotic Blueprint Coach (yet anyway), I just love love this program. It’s something I take all of my private clients though, and it’s simply incredible.

You’ve all heard of the love languages, the erotic blueprints are more like your sex love language. I describe it as, currently I’m speaking English to you, but if I encounter someone who speaks Spanish, that doesn’t mean I can't communicate with them, but if I start to learn their language I’m going to communicate and flow much better with them.
The blueprints were started and created by Jaiya who is an internationally recognized somatic sexologist, and the author of the best selling books, Red Hot Touch and Cuffed Tied and Satisfied. If you watched the show, Sex, Love & goop, which I definitely recommend, you would have seen her and her partner Ian work with a couple through their Erotic Blueprint.

What are the Erotic Blueprint Types?
Energetic -
About all of the longing for desire and creating space between intimacy. Mindfulness practices are really important for them. They’re very intuitive lovers, and enjoy the pause,  spaciousness, slow touch, and  deep eye contact. They like eye gazing, or laying on top of each other as a point of foreplay to have that mind body connection. 
Sensual -
Really deepened in the moment through their senses. Bringing taste, touch, smell, sight, and sound is really going to help them create more of an sensual erotic experience. They don’t necessarily need to have an orgasm or penetration to feel satisfied, it’s more important to them to be engulfed and embraced in all the different senses. They also have the highest and deepest capacity for pleasure because they’re experiencing from all of the senses. They can sometimes feel like they’re taking too long, or like they’re high maintenance, but their sensual practices are really letting their nervous system relax. Things like deep grounded massage, and slow intentional play are really good for them. 
Sexual -
Pretty much exactly how you see sex portrayed in the media. The person that is experiencing spontaneous desire. Sex is like eating or drinking to them, it’s constantly on their mind. They might engage frequently in masturbation, or are comfortable masturbating in front of their partner. They  might walk around topless, or want their partner to be walking around topless. They want to know how bad their partner desires them, and express how badly they want their partners.
Kinky -
They tend to feel the most shame, but are the ones that are able to heal through sex moreso than any of the other blueprints. They are great for creativity, there is so much on the spectrum of kink. Kink is essentially anything that is “taboo” to you. This can be fetishes, fantasies, desires, bdsm play, dom and sub play, or for some people even oral play. 
Shapeshifter -
They are most erotically fluid. They share the shadow sides of all the other blueprints. They may feel like they’re too much, like they don’t get their own needs met because they’re trying to meet everyone else’s needs, they are really trying to figure out how to make things work for both of us. They really need a variety of play. To get really good and solid at being a shapeshifter, you need to get very comfortable asking for what you want. 

Resources
The Erotic Blueprint
How to Create the Sex L

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Owning Your Sexual SelfBy Rachel Maine

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