In this episode of The 10 Ninety Podcast, Mason sits down with Brooke Pando for her second appearance on the show. Brooke is the mother of London "Lundy" Pando, who lives with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome type 6A—a degenerative condition that leaves her body unable to support her muscles and bones, making every day uncertain. London, now 13, survived a massive stroke in utero at 34 weeks that liquefied three-quarters of her brain, and doctors never expected her to live past her first few hours.

Since Brooke's last appearance, her mother Margo Ann Nielsen Erickson passed away suddenly from metastatic pancreatic cancer just three months after diagnosis. Brooke shares the devastating experience of losing her mother—London's best friend and their family's primary caregiver—and how it has intensified the anxiety of knowing London could die at any moment.

Brooke opens up about the dream she had months before her mother's diagnosis that warned her of the loss to come, the whirlwind of becoming her mother's full-time caregiver, and the shock of her mother's sudden death despite being on hospice. She talks about the heartbreaking day she and her father went to the cemetery to pick out burial plots—not just for her mother, but five spots total, knowing London would one day be buried there too.

Together with Mason, Brooke discusses the impossible weight of living in constant fear of losing her daughter while simultaneously grieving her mother, the guilt she feels for not being as happy as London despite London's daily suffering, and the strain that anticipatory grief puts on her marriage to Blake and her other two children. She shares London's remarkable spirit—a child who calls people five times a day just to talk, who loves Trolls and The Greatest Showman, and who remains the happiest person despite living in constant physical pain.

Brooke and Mason have an unflinchingly honest conversation about the questions that haunt them both: Where do our loved ones go when they die? Why do signs and dragonflies appear when we need them most, then disappear? How do you keep living when you know the worst is still coming? And why does grief feel so all-consuming, so relentless, so impossible to escape?

It's a raw conversation about anticipatory grief, the loneliness of waiting for tragedy, and the brutal reality that sometimes the only thing we can do is live—because that's what the people we love most would want us to do.