I only recently realized anxiety has been a part of my life for almost my entire life. When worry has been your gift for as long as you can remember, you don’t really think about it being anything other than normal. 

A few years ago a sleep doctor asked me for how much of my life I had been hyper-vigilant. Me? Hyper-vigilant? Huh…. I had never thought about myself or my worry this way.

I sat quietly and thought for a moment and then clearly and immediately knew the exact age. 

I was 8 was when I started trying to stay awake all night in case we were robbed. I woke up screaming nightly, convinced I heard someone moving our kitchen table across the linoleum floor (cause robbers usually go for kitchen tables first??) It became such an obsession that my mom eventually took me to a child psychologist to see why I might be so preoccupied with these intrusive thoughts. 

Today, I have other obsessions and intrusive thought patterns. As of late, they have been mostly related to sending my child off to kindergarten. 

While I am ridiculously excited to see him leaping toward this next step with his eyes and heart wide open, I am in deep mourning that we are closing the door on a chapter of our lives that has exploded and exposed my mind and heart to the world in ways I never thought possible. 

This transition has my anxiety all sorts of fired up and ready for action. In this episode, I share a recent event that put me over the edge and my top three tactics that help me keep my anxiety manageable in these tender and trying times of my life.

To all you Shameless Moms who are also blessed with the gift of worry, you are not alone. I am with you. Always. 

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