Why do you keep choosing the wrong people?

In this episode, I speak with Jessica Baum, a psychotherapist, relationship coach, and author of Anxiously Attached.

We explore why you keep choosing the wrong people and what that reveals about your deeper relationship patterns.

We unpack how early experiences shape who you’re drawn to, why unhealthy relationships feel familiar, and why you keep repeating the same patterns, even when you want something different.

This episode will change how you understand attraction, intimacy, and the patterns that keep you stuck.

Jessica Baum is a psychotherapist and relationship coach specializing in attachment, trauma, and building secure, healthy relationships.

Timestamps:

(00:00) Introduction: Why We Crave Unhealthy Love

(00:34) Implicit Memory and Familiar Trauma

(02:16) Nervous System and Attachment Reactions

(05:14) Healing With Secure Anchors

(06:39) Intensity Versus Safety in Love

(12:13) Beyond Codependency to Interdependence

(16:00) Healing Alone Myth and Support

(20:04) After Trauma Rebuilding Trust

(23:16) Modern Dating Apps and Choice Overload

(25:23) Kids Marriage and Conscious Choices

(29:39) Jessica Baum Origin Story

(30:18) Therapy Path and Attachment

(32:40) Healing as a Clinician

(34:06) Hospitalized Anxiety Story

(36:21) Books That Saved Her

(38:04) Purpose Behind Writing

(39:14) Safe Book Breakdown

(41:38) No Quick Fix Healing

(43:51) Life Beyond Relationships

(45:18) First Steps to Start

(47:04) Workaholism and Balance

(51:24) Advice to Younger Self

(53:08) What Happiness Means

(55:02) Final Thanks and Outro

Connect with Nick:

Instagram: https://instagram.com/nickbracks

Website: http://nickbracks.com

Email: [email protected]

Connect with Jessica:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jessicabaumlmhc/

Website: https://jessicabaumlmhc.com/

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