Today we welcome Sara Abernethy, a performer-turned-hospitalitarian who's navigating the challenges of burnout, motherhood, and partnership struggles.

This conversation isn't just about business; it's about what happens behind the scenes. Sara gets candid about the identity shifts of being in the wrong role, the toll it takes when business and marriage collide, and the resilience it requires to step back, reimagine, and pursue joy again.

If you've ever questioned whether the version of success you built is actually what you want, this episode gives you both the permission and the perspective to redefine it.

In this episode, you'll learn about:

• Sara's journey from opera singer to restaurant owner and what it taught her about roles and identity.
• The painful reality of outgrowing a version of success you once chased.
• Why chasing "hard" as an entrepreneur can mask the ahas you need to hear.
• The surprising role that motherhood played in her "midlife awakening."
• Sara's rock-bottom moment and the powerful practice of asking, "What are we tolerating?"
• A step-by-step guide to "The Work" by Byron Katie, and how it helped Sara process resentment and find clarity in her relationship.
• How to pursue joy and delight in "tiny morsels" of your everyday life.
• The simple daily mantra that can help you find a sense of peace and pride in yourself.

Episode Timestamps:

• 00:00:00 – Acknowledging that the life you built might not be what you want.
• 00:02:00 – Sara's journey: from performer to hospitalitarian and entrepreneurship.
• 00:05:00 – The identity shift from restaurant operator to CEO and the challenges it created.
• 00:09:00 – Hitting a breaking point and feeling like a "huge failure."
• 00:10:00 – How motherhood provided a necessary pause and led to an important realization.
• 00:15:00 – The struggle of constant ideas and discerning between joy and survival.
• 00:18:00 – A rock-bottom moment with her husband and facing the potential "fork in the road."
• 00:22:00 – Processing resentment and using "The Work" to find a path forward.
• 00:25:00 – Ascending to "founder land" and embracing the pursuit of joy.
• 00:27:00 – The power of "her seat at the table" and the vulnerability of shared stories.
• 00:36:00 – A final message: Why not everything you do has to be productive.
• 00:38:00 – What Sara is most proud of in this season of her life.

About Sara Abernethy:  

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sara.abernethy/ 
• Podcast: Her Seat at the Table (https://open.spotify.com/show/5rgHmPRjR3Nu8a4NcBdRR1) 
• Holiday Caroling Group, Sleigh Bells: https://www.instagram.com/sleighbellesnc/?hl=en

Local to North Carolina? Visit Sara's Restaurants: Wye Hill Kitchen and Brewing & Glasshouse Kitchen

Feeling the pull to pause and realign? Join me October 27–30 in Ocean Isle Beach, NC for my Restore & Realign Retreat, only a few spots left! Reserve yours here: https://www.theplannersvault.com/restore-realign-retreat-application

For Real on Social Media: 

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/forrealwithmegan/ 
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ForRealPodcast

Hosted by Megan Gillikin, For Real is presented by The Planner's Vault, and is produced by Walk West.