372 Pages We'll Never Get Back

Support the podcast on Patreon so you can hear our recap of the previous 7 books in the series, Encyclopedia Brown mysteries, and all the other stuff we talk about in this episode! http://patreon.com/372pages

So many characters! Why?

Ok, we’ve calmed down now. We’re back in the Tek-verse. We’re happy, I wouldn’t hesitate to say, to be here.

Get the book here.

READING ASSIGNMENT: Read through Chap. 21

If you were on Patreon this would be old news because we announced it there a week ago! Support the podcast here: patreon.com/372pages

The new book is announced! Since it is one of a series, we bring everyone up to date with excerpts of previous books AND Mike tells another story about his dad (squeamish discretion advised.)

Get the book here but no peeking ’til you’ve heard us reveal it! https://amzn.to/3Y6dS0z (affiliate link)

ASSIGNMENT: Read thru Chapter 11

Support the podcast on Patreon, where you can hear us chat with Paul Scheer and find out what our next book is before anybody else! http://patreon.com/372pages

Our final episode of Ernest Cline’s Bridge to Bat City and it may not surprise you learn that Cline wraps everything up in exactly the way you’d expect him to.

There’s a lot of Listener Mail, including some pretty good theories #cough harperlee cough trumancapote#, as well as a load of Dumb Sentences, and statistics on Mike’s Real or Fanfic.

But to start it all off, many people wrote in with some truly stunning news ripped right from today’s headlines. (I don’t think we’ve EVER had anything quite this on the nose before.)

NOTE: We had some minor audio issues (blame on some new gear in Mike’s rig.) so we’ll make it up to y’all with a Bonus tbd. Thanks.

Alejandro’s updated artwork

Bat researcher Merlin Tuttle crying

 Jonah’s statistics

 Opal’s “cameo” in Slacker

 Jacob’s list of kids books from 1927: https://372pages.com/kidsbooks.pdf

Don’t be a Muckerno, support the Podcast on Patreon! Get every episode a week early, plus a ton of other bonus stuff that we don’t put on the free feed! https://patreon.com/372pages

Shocking – truly SHOCKING – news that will shake up the 372 community almost as much as the scandal surrounding our last cozy mystery. Not since Will Smith slapped Chris Rock at the Academy Awards while that guy streaked across the stage behind David Niven has there been anything this “watercooler-talk-worthy” (<—— huh, kids? 8 year-olds, you’re eating this up, aren’t you?)

Mike and Conor continue to delve into the story of Opal and how she can communicate with bats because she was sucked up into a UFO, and now she rambles (i.e., “drives around in a car”) with her uncle Roscoe, a serious loser who destroyed his family farm, owes thousands in back taxes, and sneaks into alleys behind music clubs so he doesn’t have to pay the seventy-five cent cover charge.

All the departments are here and as a final reading assignment, FINISH THE BOOK!

(And yes, Mike forgot that a kind listener had already done a “We Didn’t Start the Fire” parody. Could we have edited it out? Sure, but why not mock him instead?)

Gallery of illustration “similarities” submitted by Jay: https://imgur.com/a/wUajGQP

Support the podcast on Patreon! Get every episode early, plus hear Mike’s Bat Story, Conor’s Paul Harvey tapes, an entire bonus podcast about Encyclopedia Brown and more! https://patreon.com/372pages

Bats can read! Or they can’t! But we know they spread mojo which causes people to groove. That’s just science.

Mike does Real or Fanfic (“does” in this context means “participates in”), we have Dumb Sentences, and we read some mail!

Finally, a reminder from the CDC: Bats are the leading cause of rabies deaths in people in the United States. People and domestic animals should avoid contact with bats. Bats should never be kept as pets. Rabies can spread to people from bats after minor, seemingly unimportant, or unrecognized bites or scratches.

Get the book here. (Affiliate Link)

ASSIGNMENT: Read until the sentence “And that’s how Opal and the bats made friends with Richard Linklater and Lee Daniel and helped out the crew of Slacker, one of the best films ever made about Austin and the people who live there.”

Support the podcast on Patreon and get to hear stuff we don’t post anywhere else! This week included Mike’s dramatic courtroom reading of a Prince song and Conor’s epic roast of a 70 year old folk son. http://patreon.com/372pages

Witness the exact moment that Cline fully becomes Cline! Also, lots of mean-spirited men in hard hats, as well as tons of references to classic 80s songs from the 60s and 70s. The Dark Web is pressed into service, and Mike just might up his batting average at Real or Fanfic.

READING ASSIGNMENT: Read through Chapter 15 PANIC ON THE STREETS OF AUSTIN

Get the big ole beautiful book here: https://amzn.to/3TRVmoL (affiliate link)

Support the Patreon to mainline Cline before anyone else! You’ll also get to hear our other podcast 280 Mysteries We’ll Never Get Back on off weeks! https://patreon.com/372pages

Ernest Cline, the founder of our feast here at 372 Pages, is back with another book, Bridge to Bat City. A day after its release, Conor and Mike review the first few chapters, take on some Dumb Sentences, Mike fails at Real or Fanfic and Conor reads some mail.

In other words, despite barely dipping a toe in, it’s a jam packed episode.

Get the big ole beautiful book here: https://amzn.to/3TRVmoL (affiliate link)

Assignment: Read thru Chapter 10

Media:

Cline at Wootstock

The RiffTrax guys at Wootstock

Megamania footage

Alejandro’s 372 character compendium

Thank you to everyone who supports the podcast on Patreon! Get every episode a week early, get an entire other podcast you won’t find anywhere else, and learn about the next book before anyone else! You’d have to be a real U-ket to miss out! https://patreon.com/372pages

We end it. The book, that is. Not the world itself. That’s up to the Demon Witches and Monchi. And the humans. And the mages. And Theo. And Jennifer. And Jasmine. And the girls. And the undead Egyptians. And the Nryphons. And the eagles. And the people of Telmar. And the Lords (you know, the ones we hold “the festival” for, even during the very darkest times of war?”) And the ever-present pork – look, we’re all happy this is over.

If you still want to read the book, it’s available here. (affiliate link)

Media:

Picture of the Columbus, OH White Horse Sallon (discovered by Marc)

Various decorative pillow pictures taken by Conor over the years

EDIT: Robert Byrd’s “War!” can be found at the 4:27 mark of this video

Support the Patreon and get every episode a week early, plus access to an entire second podcast, contests, and more! http://patreon.com/372pages

Look, yes, it’s longer than a normal episode. But to answer your question we’re less picky about the typos than we have been for the last three episodes!!

There is in the middle of this reading one of the most insane things that has ever happened in any book. Any book we’ve yet read. Truly.

And for what it’s worth Conor tackles Real or Fanfic this time and whether or not he does better than Mike is neither here nor there, why are you asking? Plus, a new Dumb Sentence song by HAYDEN!

Read along with us, get the book here. (affiliate link)

Assignment: Finish the damn book!

Don’t be a Monchi, support the podcast with a Patreon subscription! https://patreon.com/372pages

Read along with us! Ebook available here. (affiliate link)

Hey, hey! Under three hours, a truly compact episode. But the creatures mentioned continue to get stranger and more macabre: Demons, Gryphons, Nryphons, the Balls (Fire and Sylvia), Clam Woman, Man Mom and Almost Dad.

Plus, listeners continue to absolutely pummel Mike at Real or FanFic. I mean, like a mace-to-his-face pummel, blood everywhere, skull shattered. Happily Zoser was there to make things right.

Also, many, many, many Dumb Sentences featuring a new theme!

ASSIGNMENT: Read thru the chapter “In the third world”