Shameless Leadership

738: Overcoming Fear of Rejection


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For many people, there are few worse things than rejection or the threat of rejection. The fear of rejection can cause anxiety, depression, and the most relentless stress. It can stop us from going after what we want and what we deserve. It can keep us stuck for a season - or a lifetime.

When you think about fear of rejection and what that might look like for you, I want you to consider what might drive your fear of rejection. What might the underlying causes be?  

Some common causes of fear of rejection are:

  • Past life events
  • Past rejection or abandonment
  • Past trauma
  • Poor self-worth, self-esteem, sense of self
  • Susceptibility to anxiety, self-criticism

  • If you can identify where your fear of rejection stems from, it’s more likely you can talk your way through it and give it less power over you. For example, as a person who was abandoned by her father as a little girl and again as a 38-year-old woman & new mom, it is helpful for me to remind myself that my father was unable to show up for me for a myriad of reasons. Those reasons were his. They are not a reflection of my worth or my value. They are also not any indication of how others will treat me. In fact, every other human in my life has shown they are very capable of showing up and supporting me. When I talk myself through all this, I can see how I am very likely to be supported in my life no matter what I go after or if I screw up from time to time. 

    In this example, you can see where my fear of rejection might stem from as well as how I walk myself through it. You can see that in accepting my fear, labeling my fear, affirming my worth, and challenging my beliefs/past narratives, I’m able to walk my way right through this fear to a healthier place where I can show up for new things, hard things, big things, scary things - knowing that I don’t have to be perfect, get everything right, impress anyone or prove anything.  

    In this episode, I talk through 7 steps you can take to overcome the fear of rejection in order to show up for your life, go after what you want, and get all that you deserve.  


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    Shameless LeadershipBy Sara Dean

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