A Better Love with Dr. Greg Matos

Join Dr. Greg, a board-certified couples psychologist, to discuss three strategies for promoting healthier social media usage in your relationship or family.

In any system, norms are created by a consistent reinforcement of certain behaviors. Parents are the powerhouses of influence in their children’s life. A parent’s day-to-day use of the technology will speak louder than any one conversation you might have with your kid.

Are you scrolling through TikTok in your bed right before bedtime? Here’s a great place to start a new bedtime ritual for the whole family: phones away an hour before we go to sleep!

Listen for all three ways to make positive changes this week.

Follow us on Instagram and Tik Tok: @abetterloveproject for daily relationship advice between episodes. 

For more, www.abetterloveproject.org.

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Join Dr. Greg, a board-certified couples psychologist, to discuss commitment and how trust develops in the early parts of a long-term relationship.

Trust and commitment are essential ingredients to a long-term relationship. Yet, a common issue I hear about is a mismatch of commitment. What commitment looks like will differ across the span of your relationship, but a common theme is consistency.

If your partner is consistently communicating their desire for commitment through their words and actions, trust and commitment will rather naturally deepen.

Depending on attachment styles and individual histories, this process will unfold uniquely for all of us.

If you’ve been dating for over a year, it’s likely you’ve had conversations about commitment (i.e. long-term plans and dreams). It’s also likely, particularly if you’ve lived with someone, that you’ll have learned a lot about them and how consistent they are with things you value. Let that guide your discernment if things don’t appear to be “on track” for you.

It’s super helpful to take part in traditions that allow discernment and deeper exploration of what long-term commitments mean to each partner. Created sharing meaning about anything, marriage included, will be critical to staying emotionally connected to each other and the dream.

This commentary presumes a general desire for long-term, monogamous relationships. Not all people have that desire and some certainly experience relationships and love outside of marriage. The important thing is that you live aligned with your values and the kind of love life you want to create. Let mutual respect and admiration be your guide. 

✨ Follow us on Instagram and Tik Tok: @abetterloveproject ~

✨ Subscribe to the podcast and listen to the whole 10-minutes of this weekly episode: https://abetterlove.buzzsprout.com/

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Join Dr. Greg, a board-certified couples psychologist, Monday mornings for a short but deep dive into the skills necessary to love more fiercely. It will help you set relationship goals for your week. 

This week, we’re talking about romance mostly in the context of long-term relationships. If you’re single and dating, don't go anywhere. It’s important to be attuned to how your desires for romance, passion, and sex are being met from the beginning.

There’s a lot that needs tweaking in the dominant narrative of human sexuality and long-term relationships. It’s not something that evolution teaches us how to do well naturally in longer-term relationships (especially in today's changing relationship landscape). Yet, it’s possible to pair raw desire and good science to deepen your passion for the long run. 

As our appetite, desires, and comforts shift over time, we’ll want more of some things and less of others. It’s important to keep your partner updated. 

Make romance a daily thing by staying emotionally connected and flirty through touch, words, and a million other ways that will be unique to your love.

Follow us on Instagram and Tik Tok: @abetterloveproject for daily relationship advice between episodes.

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We do a deep dive on the first four sessions of couples therapy in this model as well as some things to look for in starting therapy, in general.

Definitely save this one and share it with anyone who’s ever been curious about the beginning of couples' work. While there are several evidence-based models out there, this is the one primarily.

Bottom line: make sure your provider does a solid assessment and you have a sense, “they get it” after their assessment. It’s essential that each client begins to feel understanding and emotional validation from their therapist from the start, so they can do the hard work that lies ahead.

Follow @abetterloveproject for more daily relationship advice ~

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Have you ever thought, “how can you say that?” It often comes up in conflict when we can’t understand our partner’s perspective. Chances are, they aren’t understanding yours either. 

A healthy presumption to make in a loving relationship is that you’re both invested in understanding each other, especially in conflict. 

The Gottman’s Aftermath of a Regrettable Incident or Fight is a map toward that goal. 

My recommendation this week, have those conversations in the context of a weekly “just you” time where you get to share gratitude and talk about loving each other well. This is a great ritual of emotional connection, a State of the Union convo.

Honest, gentle conversations about anything are cool. I’d recommend reserving SOTUs for relationships that are more developed, where you’ve found yourself organically talking about “us” already.

Subscribe to the podcast if you haven’t already on Apple and Spotify. 

Save and share this with your partner. And join us on Instagram @abetterloveproject.

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This week's podcast dives into your relational schemas, part of your "rulebook" for relationships.

If you're dating, knowing what healthy looks like is super important. These internal guidelines set the tone at the start of a relationship with healthy boundaries and clearly articulated desires.

If you've been together for 1+ years, here's something to consider together. Think of two couples, the one the two of you consider the healthiest and one you think is the unhealthiest. Understanding each other's roadmaps is important now and if you're interested in ever having children.

If you have kids, you could be conductors of a beautiful symphony for them, letting them witness kindness when in conflict, emotional validation, affection, etc. These early experiences for kids nourish their emotional health, foster a sense of safety and predictability, and hopefulness about their own capacity to love well.

Happy Labor Day Weekend everyone!

If you enjoyed this podcast, consider subscribing on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Follow us on Instagram: @abetterloveproject.

Until next time, love each other well : )

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What does chemistry mean to you?

This week’s episode explores how to reconnect to what you found most attractive about your partner when you first met 🔥

The intensity of passion, romance, and admiration in your relationship will fuel emotional connection.

Listen for more on @bachelorinparadise, sexual attraction, and what you could be doing to Love Better ❤️

Subscribe to the podcast, now on @applepodcasts and @spotify. Come visit me on Instagram @abetterloveproject. 

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1. If you believe in growth and want to reach your dreams with your partner.

2. If you’ve noticed a perpetual issue that you want to address in a new, effective way.

…and the rest is in the podcast ✨

Follow if you want daily relationship advice and inspiration 👉🏼@abetterlovesproject on IG.

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Share specific gratitude every day then 5 x on Saturday or Sunday ❤️

Learn about the power of gratitude in romantic relationships ✨

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Being a good dad is about being a good parent:

Do no harm
Show up
Share your values
Live your values

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