Join Dr. Greg, a board-certified couples psychologist, to discuss commitment and how trust develops in the early parts of a long-term relationship.
Trust and commitment are essential ingredients to a long-term relationship. Yet, a common issue I hear about is a mismatch of commitment. What commitment looks like will differ across the span of your relationship, but a common theme is consistency.
If your partner is consistently communicating their desire for commitment through their words and actions, trust and commitment will rather naturally deepen.
Depending on attachment styles and individual histories, this process will unfold uniquely for all of us.
If you’ve been dating for over a year, it’s likely you’ve had conversations about commitment (i.e. long-term plans and dreams). It’s also likely, particularly if you’ve lived with someone, that you’ll have learned a lot about them and how consistent they are with things you value. Let that guide your discernment if things don’t appear to be “on track” for you.
It’s super helpful to take part in traditions that allow discernment and deeper exploration of what long-term commitments mean to each partner. Created sharing meaning about anything, marriage included, will be critical to staying emotionally connected to each other and the dream.
This commentary presumes a general desire for long-term, monogamous relationships. Not all people have that desire and some certainly experience relationships and love outside of marriage. The important thing is that you live aligned with your values and the kind of love life you want to create. Let mutual respect and admiration be your guide.
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