Adoption: The Making of Me. An Oral History of Adoptee Stories

Ellen is a baby scoop-era New York State adoptee. She was adopted by a loving Greek American couple through a closed private adoption and raised in the San Francisco Bay Area with a younger adopted brother.

Ellen always wanted to find her original family and searched off and on starting in the early 90s but kept hitting roadblocks. Her adoptive parents were not supportive of her search so she had very little information to go on. Then a friend had her rescue dog’s DNA tested which changed everything for the better.

To skip ahead to the interview go to timestamp: 16:13

Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood, by Gretchen Sisson

RESOURCES for Adoptees
S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary
Hiraeth Hope & Healing
Moses Farrow
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – 1-800-273-8255 OR Dial or Text 988.
NAMI Hotline at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or email them at [email protected]
Adoptee Therapist Directory

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.

Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom adoptee community. Our next Zoom is 6/1 @ 1pm ET.
Our Patrons:  Laura, Barbara, Ramona, Linda, Daphne, Denise, Michelle, Emily, Linda, John, Eric, Beth, Ron, Tony, Kristi,  Kristen, Jane, Kelley, Sandra, The Harpy, Kristan, Lisa,  Michelle, Jesper, Julie, Rivi, Robert,  Colleen, Janet, Robin, Lynn, Mikki, Sharon, Carol, Elizabeth, Diane, Ann, Darra, A.M., Kelly, Lyn, Lynn Wood, Jeff, Karla, Ellen,  Gayle Whitlock,  Dave, Kim, Simone, Liesl, Kelly, Sherry, Barbara and Sandra.

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Simone Pajo was born in Auckland New Zealand in 1968, the baby scoop era.  She was the middle child between two bio children and was adopted after the death of the middle bio daughter.  She grew up knowing her adoption was the result of a baby's death and this greatly affected the way she saw the world and her place in it.  It has taken decades for Simone to form a coherent worldview where her right to her identity does not depend on the needs of others.

She has lived in the UK for over 30 years and is a law graduate and former journalist.

To skip ahead to the interview go to timestamp: 13:53

Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood, by Gretchen Sisson

RESOURCES for Adoptees
S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary
Hiraeth Hope & Healing
Moses Farrow
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – 1-800-273-8255 OR Dial or Text 988.
NAMI Hotline at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or email them at [email protected]

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.

Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom adoptee community.
Our Patrons:  Laura, Barbara, Ramona, Linda, Daphne, Denise, Michelle, Emily, Linda, John, Eric, Beth, Ron, Tony, Kristi,  Kristen, Jane, Kelley, Sandra, The Harpy, Kristan, Lisa,  Michelle, Jesper, Julie, Rivi, Robert,  Colleen, Janet, Robin, Lynn, Mikki, Sharon, Carol, Elizabeth, Diane, Ann, Darra, A.M., Kelly, Lyn, Lynn Wood, Jeff, Karla, Ellen,  Gayle Whitlock,  Dave, Kim, Simone, Liesl, Kelly, Sherry, and Barbara.

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Ryan Anderson is a foundling and a transnational, transracial, and late discovery adoptee (LDA). Found on the street in El Jadida, Morocco he was adopted at age 3 months and then brought to Scotland at age 6 months, in between this time he was fostered by a Moroccan family. He first found out he was adopted at age 18. Since 2020 he has been focused on personal development, to then became open to sharing his story at age 31.

To skip ahead to the interview go to timestamp: 14:21

Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood, by Gretchen Sisson

RESOURCES for Adoptees
S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary
Hiraeth Hope & Healing
Moses Farrow
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – 1-800-273-8255 OR Dial or Text 988.
NAMI Hotline at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or email them at [email protected]

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.

Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom adoptee community.
Our Patrons:  Laura, Barbara, Ramona, Linda, Daphne, Denise, Michelle, Emily, Linda, John, Eric, Beth, Ron, Tony, Kristi,  Kristen, Jane, Kelley, Sandra, The Harpy, Kristan, Lisa,  Michelle, Jesper, Julie, Rivi, Robert,  Colleen, Janet, Robin, Lynn, Mikki, Sharon, Carol, Elizabeth, Diane, Ann, Darra, A.M., Kelly, Lyn, Lynn Wood, Jeff, Karla, Ellen,  Gayle Whitlock,  Dave, Kim, Simone, Liesl, Kelly, Sherry, and Barbara.

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Jessica is a 1970 baby scoop-era adoptee, who started discovering her roots at age 50. After more than 80 years of closed records in NYS, she was able to obtain her original birth certificate in 2020. Two DNA tests and one secret after another uncovered a history of relinquishment, trauma, and family ties nearby of where she resides in upstate New York. 

At 54, Jessica is learning to live her truth on her terms and allowing herself to heal from the lifelong effects of being adopted. A retired art teacher, she is running a thriving business and enjoying her life with her amazing sons and husband, all while continuing to uncover more pieces of her genetic puzzle. 

To skip ahead to the interview go to timestamp: 12:06

Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood, by Gretchen Sisson

RESOURCES for Adoptees
S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary
Hiraeth Hope & Healing
Moses Farrow
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – 1-800-273-8255 OR Dial or Text 988.
NAMI Hotline at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or email them at [email protected]

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.

Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom adoptee community. 
Our Patrons:  Laura, Barbara, Ramona, Linda, Daphne, Denise, Michelle, Emily, Linda, John, Eric, Beth, Ron, Tony, Kristi,  Kristen, Jane, Kelley, Sandra, The Harpy, Kristan, Lisa,  Michelle, Jesper, Julie, Rivi, Robert,  Colleen, Janet, Robin, Lynn, Mikki, Sharon, Carol, Elizabeth, Diane, Ann, Darra, A.M., Kelly, Lyn, Lynn Wood, Jeff, Karla, Ellen,  Gayle Whitlock,  Dave, Kim, Simone, Liesl, Kelly, Sherry, and Barbara.

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Valerie Naiman is an adoptee, singer, story-songwriter, eco-village founder, ontologist, and author. Her #1 bestseller book, Mystic Masquerade, an Adoptee's Search for Truth, was based on five decades of a search that took her around the world as she unraveled the mystery of her stolen identity. 

Valerie holds a master's degree in Art and worked as a costume designer and actress in film and theatre in NY, Miami & LA. She’s the President of the Spirit Foundation, a non-profit that supports disenfranchised children..She also leads seekers to sacred sites in the USA and abroad. In 1990 she had an intense vision that ended up founding the first Eco-village in North America.

Through all of her adventures, she journaled her findings as she excavated her biological and spiritual identity. 

Presently, Valerie is completing an audiobook version of Mystic Masquerade and producing an album of story songs about her search. She now lives on a small organic farm in Asheville, NC with her dwarf goats and honeybees.

Valerie's Book Trailer and Website
Instagram @valnaimanauthor and Facebook @valnaimanauthor

To skip ahead to the interview go to timestamp: 15:29

Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood, by Gretchen Sisson

S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.

Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom adoptee community. Our Patrons:  Laura Christensen, Barbara Frank, Ramona Evans, Linda Pevac, Blonde Records, Daphne Keys, Denise Hewitt, Michelle Styles, Emily Sinagra, Linda David, John Frey, Eric David, Beth Figuls, Ron Schneider, Tony Corsentino, Kristi Reed,  Kristen Steinhilber, Jane Bofenkamp, Kelley Brickfield, Sandra de Quesada, The Harpy, Kristan Higgin, Lisa Thompson,  Michelle Goodwine, Jesper Laursen, Julie Malone, Rivi Shocket , Robert Perrino,  Colleen McCall, Janet MacDonald, Robin Wells, Lynn Grubb, Mikki Jackson-Brown, Sharon Katzmann, Carol Levitt, Elizabeth McDonald, Diane Moore, Ann Mikeska, Darra Robins, A.M. Homes, Kelly Layton, Lynn Marie, Lynn Wood, Jeff Wadstrom, Karla, Ellen Ashcraft,  Gayle Whitlock,  Dave, Kim Mullis, Simone Jung, Liesl de Wet, Kelly Jennings, Sherry Espinoza and Barbara Whitacre.

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Chris Valdheims is a domestic adoptee born in the late 1970s and adopted in the early 1980s after spending years of his early childhood in foster care. Growing up, he knew very little about his birth family other than his mother and father had met while she worked as a librarian at MIT. He also knew his father was Black, and his mother had immigrated to the United States from Latvia. He spent years searching for answers about his family of origin, and in 2009, he stumbled upon a complex story that involved his grandfather, a then-unknown geometric artist named Zanis Waldheims. 

Following the trail from there, he began to unravel the mystery of his family history and, in the process, learn more about himself and where he had come from. His journey took him to Canada, Germany, Latvia, and Lithuania for answers, and he shares the story in a recently completed memoir for which he is currently seeking the right publishing partner. Along the way, he discovered that his father may have been one of the astronauts killed in the 1986 Challenger Space Shuttle disaster.

He resides in Los Angeles with his wife and two sons and is the founder of a well-known law firm, Counsel for Creators.

Chris Valdheims on Instagram.

To skip ahead to the interview go to timestamp: 18:29

Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood, by Gretchen Sisson

S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.

Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom adoptee community.

Our Patrons:  Laura Christensen, Barbara Frank, Ramona Evans, Linda Pevac, Blonde Records, Daphne Keys, Denise Hewitt, Michelle Styles, Emily Sinagra, Linda David, John Frey, Eric David, Beth Figuls, Ron Schneider, Tony Corsentino, Kristi Reed,  Kristen Steinhilber, Jane Bofenkamp, Kelley Brickfield, Sandra de Quesada, The Harpy, Kristan Higgin, Lisa Thompson,  Michelle Goodwine, Jesper Laursen, Julie Malone, Rivi Shocket , Robert Perrino,  Colleen McCall, Janet MacDonald, Robin Wells, Lynn Grubb, Mikki Jackson-Brown, Sharon Katzmann, Carol Levitt, Elizabeth McDonald, Diane Moore, Ann Mikeska, Darra Robins, A.M. Homes, Kelly Layton, Lynn Marie, Lynn Wood, Jeff Wadstrom, Karla, Ellen Ashcraft,  Gayle Whitlock,  Dave, Kim Mullis, Simone Jung, 
Liesl de Wet and Kelly Jennings. 

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

After being an only child all her life, Margaret Jane’s adoptive parents adopted four more children through the foster care system. This experience of witnessing adoption through foster care, and being the oldest sister of a group of adoptees, has given her a unique perspective and experience with adoption. 

Margaret Jane is married to her high school sweetheart, who she shares 3 kiddos with. She is an avid gardener, houseplant collector, and sourdough enthusiast. She also enjoys playing various musical instruments with her family and singing and playing for her church worship team.  

Margaret Jane works as an adoption “storyteller” for Adoption.com, where her job is to write and tell her own adoption story, as well as the adoption stories of other adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents. She is passionate about educating adoptive parents on how to do adoption better. She is also passionate about amplifying adoptee voices and sharing their stories. 

To skip ahead to the interview go to timestamp: 11:31

Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood, by Gretchen Sisson

S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.

Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom adoptee community.

Our Patrons:  Laura Christensen, Barbara Frank, Ramona Evans, Linda Pevac, Blonde Records, Daphne Keys, Denise Hewitt, Michelle Styles, Emily Sinagra, Linda David, John Frey, Eric David, Beth Figuls, Ron Schneider, Tony Corsentino, Kristi Reed,  Kristen Steinhilber, Jane Bofenkamp, Kelley Brickfield, Sandra de Quesada, The Harpy, Kristan Higgin, Lisa Thompson,  Michelle Goodwine, Jesper Laursen, Julie Malone, Rivi Shocket , Robert Perrino,  Colleen McCall, Janet MacDonald, Robin Wells, Lynn Grubb, Mikki Jackson-Brown, Sharon Katzmann, Carol Levitt, Elizabeth McDonald, Diane Moore, Ann Mikeska, Darra Robins, A.M. Homes, Kelly Layton, Lynn Marie, Lynn Wood, Jeff Wadstrom, Karla, Ellen Ashcraft,  Gayle Whitlock, Dave & Kim Mullis.

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Susan Ito is the author of the memoir, I Would Meet You Anywhere, published by the Ohio State University Press in November 2023. She co-edited the literary anthology A Ghost At Heart’s Edge: Stories & Poems of Adoption. Her work has appeared in The Writer, Growing Up Asian American, Choice, Hip Mama, Literary Mama, Catapult, Hyphen, The Bellevue Literary Review, and elsewhere.  Her theatrical adaption of Untold, stories of reproductive stigma, was produced at Brava Theater. She is a member of the Writers’ Grotto, and teaches at the Mills College campus of Northeastern University. She was a co-organizer of Rooted and Written, a writing workshop for writers of color.

I Would Meet You Anywhere by Susan Kiyo Ito. Use Discount  MAKINGOF  for 30% off.

As mentioned by Susan in the episode: The Alliance for the Study of Adoption and Culture Conference- April 4th-6th at Brown University

To skip ahead to the interview go to timestamp: 17:15

S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary

Update: Although we are unable to attend Chicago's Foglift in May, here is the link for Early Bird tickets: Foglift Early Bird Link: Chicago: May 17th & 18th

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.
Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom adoptee community.

Our Patrons:  Laura Christensen, Barbara Frank, Ramona Evans, Linda Pevac, Blonde Records, Daphne Keys, Denise Hewitt, Michelle Styles, Emily Sinagra, Linda David, John Frey, Eric David, Beth Figuls, Ron Schneider, Tony Corsentino, Kristi Reed,  Kristen Steinhilber, Jane Bofenkamp, Kelley Brickfield, Sandra de Quesada, The Harpy, Kristan Higgin, Lisa Thompson,  Michelle Goodwine, Jesper Laursen, Julie Malone, Rivi Shocket , Robert Perrino,  Colleen McCall, Janet MacDonald, Robin Wells, Lynn Grubb, Mikki Jackson-Brown, Sharon Katzmann, Carol Levitt, Elizabeth McDonald, Diane Moore, Ann Mikeska, Darra Robins, A.M. Homes, Kelly Layton, Lynn Marie, Lynn Wood, Jeff Wadstrom & Karla.

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Stacie is a Canadian born and an adoptee to same race and religion parents in 1991-1992. She is part of a mixed family of adopted and “home-made” siblings, all boys, and is the second oldest. She grew up mostly outdoors in the Wasatch Mountains of Utah. Traveling to Canada every summer fostered loving bonds with both of her grandmas and many cousins. Living further away from them, though, meant she had to create her group of “family” as she grew up. She’s maintained supportive friendships spanning over 25 years that have involved a lot of skiing, hiking, traveling, education, football games, collecting dogs, significant others, and now nieces and nephews.

Reading and music have always been crucial in her life allowing her to think beyond the mountains enclosing the valley she grew up in. Her parents couldn’t contain her independence early on as she studied abroad in Costa Rica and then Spain. After the initial culture shock, she thrives in solitude; searching for something untouched by her conscious mind, a longing that always tugged at her heart. Learning about and experiencing other cultures has been a way to fill the void of her unknown lineage. She isn’t afraid to show her gratitude in any setting: thankfulness, every moment, every experience, and every person who has contributed to that
sense of fullness.

Regardless of the reason for “searching” for a first family, Stacie believes in adoptees. should always feel free and empowered to do so. She doesn’t believe there is a “right” way to do it as adoptees never signed a legal form to be in this position so they shouldn’t be held to the standards are adoptive parents agreed to. The World Wide Web is our friend!

Stacie hopes to finish her memoir at some point in the future and maintain healthy
relationships with all the family involved in her birth and upbringing. You can find her only on Instagram @stacegrier or in the mountains. Sending so much love to all the adoptees finding their way or already there

Update: We are not able to attend Chicago Foglift - to attend: Foglift Early Bird Link: Chicago: May 17th & 18th


LIVE PODCAST GUEST: If you would like to be the guest on the LIVE podcast by Sarah & Louise, please send an email to: [email protected] (make sure you are free to be in Chicago and you would be comfortable in front of a live audience and being filmed/recorded). We will choose one adoptee.
 
I Would Meet You Anywhere by Susan Kiyo Ito. Use Discount  MAKINGOF  for 30% off.

Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.
Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom adoptee community.

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Ken DeStefano is a domestic adoptee born in the late 1960's and raised in a caring and loving home.  As an adoptee, he has had a largely happy life, but always wondered about the unknown.  That curiosity led to a search for his birth mother and a reunification with her.  His debut novel, "I Will See You Again...Hearts Will Sing," tells the story of two people whose past, present, and future lives are inexplicably linked.

Update: We are not able to attend Chicago Foglift - to attend: Foglift Early Bird Link: Chicago: May 17th & 18th


LIVE PODCAST GUEST: If you would like to be the guest on the LIVE podcast by Sarah & Louise, please send an email to: [email protected] (make sure you are free to be in Chicago and you would be comfortable in front of a live audience and being filmed/recorded). We will choose one adoptee.
 
I Would Meet You Anywhere by Susan Kiyo Ito.
Use Discount  MAKINGOF  for 30% off.

Thank you S12F for our past support and support of Adoptee 501c3 organizations.
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary
To learn more about CAAR visit the Facebook Page

If you want to support our show, visit our Patreon Page.
Our Patrons:  Laura Christensen, Barbara Frank, Ramona Evans, Linda Pevac, Blonde Records, Daphne Keys, Denise Hewitt, Michelle Styles, Emily Sinagra, Linda David, John Frey, Eric David, Beth Figuls, Ron Schneider, Tony Corsentino, Kristi Reed,  Kristen Steinhilber, Jane Bofenkamp, Kelley Brickfield, Sandra de Quesada, The Harpy, Kristan Higgin, Lisa Thompson,  Michelle Goodwine, Jesper Laursen, Julie Malone, Rivi Shocket , Robert Perrino,  Colleen McCall, Janet MacDonald, Robin Wells, Lynn Grubb, Mikki Jackson-Brown, Sharon Katzmann, Carol Levitt, Elizabeth McDonald, Diane Moore, Ann Mikeska, Darra Robins, A.M. Homes, Kelly Layton, Lynn Marie & Karla.

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.