Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Parenting

By Dr. Lisa Damour/Good Trouble Productions

Kids & Family

What's Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Parenting about?

Raising kids can be a bumpy, stressful, and uncertain process – which is why Dr. Lisa Damour is here to help. The New York Times Adolescence columnist and author of bestsellers Untangled and Under Pressure brings her sane, informed, and practical perspective to your timely and timeless parenting questions. Cohost Reena Ninan, a world-class journalist who has covered the White House while packing a breast pump, makes sure to get you the answers you need.

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59: My Daughter Is the Mean...

12.07.2021

What if your child is the one who is hurting other kids feelings at school? A concerned mom discovers that her daughter, who has been struggling socially, is pushing peers away by being too critical. She turns to Dr. Lisa ...

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Parenting episodes:

12.07.2021 59: My Daughter Is the Mean Girl. What Do I Do? What if your child is the one who is hurting other kids feelings at school? A concerned mom discovers that her daughter, who has been struggling socially, is pushing peers away by being too critical. She turns to Dr. Lisa ...
11.30.2021 58: Does My Child Have OCD? How do you know if your child has Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)? A parent writes in worried about her daughter’s compulsive behavior and anxiety around germs. Dr. Lisa describes OCD, how it takes hold, when it's time to worry, and what ...
11.23.2021 57: Happy Holidays? Dealing with Difficult Relatives. As we reconnect with family over the holidays how do we deal with difficult relatives? Dr. Lisa explains the importance of crafting a plan that can help navigate what should be a happy time of year. What about relatives who ...
11.16.2021 56: Encore - My Child is Turning Into a Teenager. How Do I Handle It? Managing the teenage years can be overwhelming. Dr. Lisa explains what the toughest year is for teens and why. When kids hit thirteen they often become highly emotional. What happens in the brain and the body during this time? Dr. ...
11.09.2021 55: How Do I Keep My Kids Grounded in a Materialistic World? What should parents do when their kids want to own the same luxury goods that belong to some of their friends and classmates? Dr. Lisa explains how we can respond to requests for expensive gifts, and how that conversation will ...
11.02.2021 54: How and When Do I Give My Kid a Phone? What’s the right age to get your kid a cell phone? Dr. Lisa and Reena look at the research on both sides of the debate. When a parent writes in asking if thirteen might be the right age, Lisa shares ...
10.26.2021 53: Should I Comment on My Child’s Weight? How do we teach kids healthy eating habits without focusing on calories or portion size? A parent writes in asking for advice about whether she should say something about her daughter's increasing weight. Dr. Lisa explains how to approach the ...
10.19.2021 52: What Do Parents Need to Know About Edibles? Dr. Lisa offers a deep-dive into the world of edible marijuana and how to talk with your child about the dangers of trying edibles. Reena asks what’s the difference between CBD and THC? How does marijuana affect the brain? What ...
10.14.2021 Welcome to Ask Lisa! Raising kids can be a bumpy, stressful, and uncertain process – which is why Lisa’s podcast brings her sane, informed, and practical perspective to your timely and timeless parenting questions. Cohost Reena Ninan, a world-class journalist who has covered the ...
10.12.2021 51: I Hate Nagging My Kids. What Else Works? At what age should kids be expected to manage their responsibilities without constant reminders? Dr. Lisa explains how parents can help kids remember to do things on their own. What else works besides nagging? Reena asks for strategies to help ...
10.05.2021 50: How Do I Build My Kid’s Confidence and Self-Esteem? Where do confidence and self-esteem come from? What contributes to kids' highs and lows and how can parents help kids build a sturdy sense of self-esteem? Dr. Lisa describes the age at which self-esteem tends to drop off and the ...
09.28.2021 49: Should My Teen Socialize With Unvaccinated Friends? A Mom writes in from the deep South with concerns about whether to allow her daughter to socialize with a good friend who is unvaccinated. Dr. Lisa discusses the importance of framing the issue around the child’s safety while allowing ...
09.21.2021 48: How Often Should I Be in Touch with My College Freshman? Getting into college is hard work. So how do you raise kids who will thrive once they get there? Dr. Lisa explains how parents can prepare their kids to succeed when they become independent (hint: it's not about academics). When ...
09.14.2021 47: Should Teens Be Allowed to Drink at Home? Dr. Lisa and Reena get a letter from parents who are torn about allowing their underaged child to drink in their home. Dad wants the child to feel comfortable around alcohol, but Mom is not comfortable serving their teenager at ...
09.07.2021 46: How Do You Help a Kid Who Shuts You Out? You’ve heard people say, “I want to get this off my chest,” but what if your kid doesn’t know how to express emotion? How do you get children and teenagers to talk? Dr. Lisa explains the term "emotional regulation," and ...
08.31.2021 45: I Don't Like My Kid's Friends. What Do I Do? Is it ever too late to help your child rethink a friendship? How do you lay the groundwork to help children choose the right people to be in their lives? Dr. Lisa explains how the friends our kids chose can ...
08.24.2021 44: Seriously?! How Do I Face Back-to-School 2021? Dr. Lisa Damour and Reena Ninan kick off Season Two of Ask Lisa by talking about how to cope with another school year under Covid-19. They tackle a letter from a parent seeking advice on how to deal with her ...
06.08.2021 43: What Should My Kids Do This Summer? Should we be pushing children and teens to make up for lost learning this summer? Or should we let them call the shots on how they spend their time? What really matters most? Dr. Lisa has advice that might seem ...
06.01.2021 42: How Do I Talk to My Child About Racism? With Special Guest: Emmanuel Acho Lisa and Reena are joined by guest Emmanuel Acho, former NFL linebacker, current FoxSports analyst, host of the YouTube hit "Uncomfortable Conversations With a Black Man," and author of a book by the same name. Most recently, Emmanuel wrote the ...
05.25.2021 41: How Do I Help My Kid Find Friends Again? The pandemic has disrupted our kids' social lives. What can parents do to help a child make new friends if they've withdrawn from their peers? How do we help kids who are reluctant to reach out, or who rub their ...
05.18.2021 40: My Kid’s Room Is a Hot Mess. What Should I Do? Should you be concerned if your child has a messy, disorganized room? A mom emails asking for advice on how to handle a kid's room that feels out of control. Dr. Lisa introduces us to the term executive functioning, the ...
05.11.2021 39: How Do I Get My Kids to Stop Fighting? After more than a year of being stuck at home in a pandemic, it’s no surprise siblings are getting on each other's nerves. Should parents step in - or step back - when kids start fighting? Dr. Lisa tackles this ...
05.04.2021 38: How Do I Teach My Kids About Consent? Talking to kids about their love lives can be uncomfortable, but discussing consent is one of the most important conversations to have with our children. Dr. Lisa explains why she feels that when we focus on consent, we are articulating ...
04.27.2021 37: How Do I Know If My Child Has an Eating Disorder? Experts are finding that the pandemic has led to an alarming rise in eating disorders. Dr. Lisa explains how eating disorders can sneak up on families and why they can be incredibly harmful. Lisa and Reena discuss how social media ...
04.20.2021 36: Helping Kids Manage Grief and Loss "If the pandemic is about anything, it's about loss,” says Dr. Lisa Damour. Grief can come in different forms - from losing a loved one, to mourning the loss of senior year in high school, to not getting into your ...
04.13.2021 35: Sexy Social Media. Where Should Parents Draw the Line? How do you talk to kids about social media postings that might cross a line? What's the best way to start a conversation with your sons and daughters about what's too sexy for public consumption? A parent writes to Lisa ...
04.06.2021 34: How to Raise an Adult How do you prepare kids for life in the real world? Author Julie Lythcott-Haims joins Lisa and Reena for a conversation on the non-academic skills your children need to succeed as they move into young adulthood. Julie spent more than ...
03.30.2021 33: Encore Podcast: Toolbox for Terrible Times As we move into the next phase of this pandemic we take listeners back to an encore presentation of "Toolbox for Terrible Times: How to Manage Hopelessness and Helplessness." Lisa offers specific tools to help children with their feelings and ...
03.23.2021 32: Lying, Sneaking, Cheating. What Keeps Kids From Being Honest? There are many reasons why kids lie to parents. Dr. Lisa gives several explanations for why kids sometimes don’t tell the truth and shares stories from her practice of the difficult scenarios she's helped families navigate, including an example of ...
03.16.2021 31: My Kid Looked at Porn. What Should I Do? Talking to a child about pornography might not be a conversation most parents think of having. However, by the age of sixteen, 90% of kids have looked at porn. Dr. Lisa Damour explains that kids' interest in sex is normal ...
03.09.2021 30: My Kids & I Have Hit a Wall. How Do We Keep Going? With the one year anniversary of the pandemic approaching there are reasons to be hopeful. The infection rates are dropping and more vaccines are being distributed. So why do so many people still feel down? Reena asks about what parents ...
03.02.2021 29: How Do I Get My Kid Into Mindfulness? Finding time to quiet your mind can have real benefits for you and your child. Author, instructor, mom, and entrepreneur Mallika Chopra is our special guest. She says that meditation isn’t just repeating mantras - there are many other ways ...
02.23.2021 28: Bored, Sad, & Smoking Weed: How Do We Talk to Kids About Drug Use? A parent writes in asking for help to address a teenager's marijuana use. Some teens are turning to drugs in this pandemic as they are looking for ways to cope with the sadness and boredom. Dr. Lisa explains what actually ...
02.16.2021 27: What Do I Do When Friends and Family Don't Share Our Covid Rules? Should you speak up when you disagree with the approach other families are taking with their Covid rules? Reena discusses the latest news on the spread of the British mutation and Dr. Lisa describes the mental maneuvers we make when ...
02.09.2021 26: My Child is Turning Into a Teenager. How Do I Handle It? When kids hit thirteen they often become highly emotional. What happens in the brain and the body during this time? Dr. Lisa explains and also talks about the process of "separation-individuation" where young people seek to define their own identities ...
02.02.2021 25: How Do I Get My Smelly Teen to Shower? How do you get kids to understand the importance of hygiene? A mom writes in that her son is making life unbearable at home because he refuses to take regular showers since he has spent much of the year learning ...
01.26.2021 24: My Daughter Is Questioning Her Gender. What Do I Do? A single mom writes in feeling worried because her daughter is questioning her gender. Dr. Lisa explains what we understand about gender identity and sexual orientation, and offers advice on what to do when you are at an impasse with ...
01.19.2021 23: I Can’t Make Sense of America. What Do I Tell My Kids? It’s not always easy to be the grownup in the room. What are the teachable moments for our children as we watch alarming events unfold in Washington DC? How do you move beyond intense polarization? Lisa talks about research conducted ...
01.12.2021 22: My Kid Hates Remote Learning. What Do I Do? Parents are finding it hard to get their children to feel motivated about school, especially when they are learning remotely. Dr. Lisa explains strategies that might help and how parents can help kids keep the academic train on its tracks. ...
01.05.2021 21: How Do I Hit the Reset Button for 2021? Lisa and Reena kick off the new year with a look at positive psychology. What is it and how exactly does it work? How do you stay positive when things aren’t rosy? Reena asks about the psychology of manifesting. Does ...
12.22.2020 20: Kids & Covid: Pediatrician & Covid-19 Expert Dr. Cara Natterson Answers Your Questions When can your kids get vaccinated? If my child has recovered from Covid-19, how long does immunity last? How do you know when it’s really safe to send your kids back to school? Lisa and Reena get answers to key ...
12.15.2020 19: How Will the Pandemic Affect my Child Long-term? We like to think that time can heal a lot, but when do we need to worry about the pandemic's lasting impact on our children? Lisa introduces us to the concept of “ordinary magic” - protective processes that happen at ...
12.08.2020 18: Can Online Socializing Go Too Far? What’s the limit for children socializing online? Many kids use social media to connect with their friends and as an escape from the monotony of this pandemic. Lisa walks us through the pros and cons of being online - from ...
12.01.2020 17: How Do I Get My Kid To Open Up? How do you approach your child when you know they may be struggling but won’t open up? Lisa shares what she learned when she asked teens why they sometimes clam up around their parents. Lisa and Reena consider how much ...
11.24.2020 16: How Do You Handle Holidays in a Pandemic? Navigating the holidays under Covid has its own pressures. A season that should be marked by joy is being met with sadness and loss by so many. Lisa explains how taking time to mourn the temporary loss of our regular ...
11.17.2020 15: How Has the Pandemic Changed College Admissions? High school seniors are feeling the disruption of the pandemic as they tackle the college admissions process. How do we help them manage these uncertain times while they plan the next chapter of their lives? Special guest and New York ...
11.10.2020 14: Dads & Daughters, Mothers & Sons: How Does Gender Shape Parenting? How do dads differ from moms when it comes to raising kids? Lisa unpacks the research on the different roles each parent plays while pointing out that there are no hard and fast gender lines in parenting and that you ...
11.03.2020 13: How Do I Motivate My Kid to Do Homework? Students are finding it hard to focus on school in the midst of a pandemic. But laying a good foundation for how homework gets done is a skill that can be carried into adulthood. Lisa explains the psychological research behind ...
10.27.2020 12: What Can Kids Learn from a Tense Election? How can parents help children cultivate the ability to have tough conversations? How do we teach tolerance? Lisa explains the building blocks of civil discourse and the emotional and developmental skills that help kids engage peers constructively on the charged ...
10.20.2020 11: Where's the Line Between Being Healthy and Having an Eating Disorder? Eating concerns are an issue in many families, especially during the Coronavirus pandemic. What should a parent look out for? When is it time to be concerned? And what happens in the mind of someone who struggles with an eating ...

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