Hard to starboard, ladies! Batten down the hatches and meet us on the bridge, we're setting sail with the sternest lesbian on television—Captain Sandy Yawn—and her riveting collection of sea shanties, "Be the Calm or Be The Storm: Lessons in Leadership from a Woman at the Helm." The star of Bravo's Below Deck: Mediterranean charts a rocky course through Yemeni war zones, Adderall prescriptions, international sex trafficking, inflatable slides, espresso martinis and dense torsos—pay attention, this will be on the maritime law certification exam. Toys in the water!

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