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What happens when we stop trying to win arguments and start trying to understand each other?Ā
In this episode of Derate The Hate, Wilk Wilkinson sits down with Sydney-based creative and entrepreneur Jonah Primo, producer of Australiaās #1 philosophy podcast Principle of Charity and host of The Overexamined Life. Together, they explore how empathy, mindfulness, and the principle of charity can shift the way we engage with othersāespecially when we disagree.
Jonah shares his powerful personal journey from dissatisfaction to deep fulfillment, shaped by years of studying philosophy, meditation, and lived human experiences. This conversation dives into the mental frameworks that help reduce polarization, foster gratitude, and bring presence into everyday life.
š§ Topics include:
If youāre tired of toxic discourse and ready to rethink how we relate across divides, this oneās for you.
š Learn more about Jonah Primoās work:
š§ Whether youāre curious about improving dialogue, managing your emotional triggers, or just living with a bit more joy, this episode delivers.
š§ Donāt forget to subscribe and leave a review if this conversation resonated with you!
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
Send Wilk a text with your feedback! (incoming msgs only - I can't reply)
Episode 259 ā Dr. Bruce Chalmer: When Communication Isnāt the Real Problem in Relationships (or in Society)
What if the root of conflict in our relationships ā and in our divided world ā isnāt a failure to communicate, but a failure to tolerate discomfort?
In this episode of Derate The Hate, I sit down with couples therapist and author Dr. Bruce Chalmer to explore how anxiety, not poor communication, is often the true barrier to meaningful connection ā both in marriages and across ideological divides.
Bruce has worked with couples for nearly 30 years, and his book Itās Not About Communication! challenges everything we think we know about relationship struggles. But what makes this conversation especially powerful is how deeply his insights apply beyond romantic partnerships ā to how we engage in tough conversations with those we disagree with.
In this episode, youāll discover:
ā
Why communication isnāt the root problem in many relationships
ā
How anxiety disrupts connection and meaningful dialogue
ā
Why tolerating discomfort is essential to emotional intimacy
ā
How ideas lead to growth, but ideologies often create rigidity
ā
The impact of confirmation bias on both romantic and political conversations
ā
Why faith in othersā humanity is foundational for bridging divides
ā
How the tools of couples therapy can strengthen civil discourse
We also discuss Bruceās podcast with his wife Judy, Couples Therapy in Seven Words, where they explore love, faith, and what it means to truly connect in a world that often prioritizes being right over being human.
Key Takeaways:
ā
Emotional connection requires vulnerability, not just technique
ā
Communication āproblemsā are often anxiety in disguise
ā
Real transformation comes from deep listening and mutual respect
ā
The goal of conversation isnāt to win ā itās to connect
ā
We must create shared space for dialogue, even amid disagreement
Learn more about and connect with Dr. Bruce Chalmer by getting the full show notes at www.DerateTheHate.com
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
Send Wilk a text with your feedback! (incoming msgs only - I can't reply)
Episode 287 ā Rebuilding Social Trust Through Place-Based Community Engagement with Eric Higbee
In this powerful episode of the Derate The Hate podcast, Wilk Wilkinson sits down with landscape architect, community organizer, and writer Eric Higbee to explore the transformative power of place-based community engagement in our increasingly fragmented society.
Eric shares insights from his multifaceted work at the intersection of placemaking, civic renewal, and social psychology. Through his award-winning design practice, Convene, and his respected Substack newsletter, The Answer is Community, Eric helps individuals and local governments build deeper, more empathetic relationships where they live.
Ā Key Topics Covered:
ā
Why online interactions canāt replace real, local community engagement
ā
The psychology behind building empathy and reducing social anxiety
ā
How intergroup contact theory supports community healing
ā
The dual role of grassroots organizing and local government in fostering social cohesion
ā
How common cause projects can unite people across ideological divides
ā
The importance of physical spaces in creating social trust
ā
What civic participation really looks like in your own neighborhood
Top Takeaways:
ā
Civic renewal starts locallyāthrough real-world relationships and shared purpose
ā
Empathy and anxiety reduction are vital for bridging social divides
ā
Both individuals and local governments must take ownership of community wellbeing
ā
Place-based communities are the foundation for lasting social cohesion
Whether youāre a local leader, community-minded citizen, or simply tired of online polarization, this episode will inspire you to engage more deeply with those around youāand offer tools to get started.
Learn more about and connect with Eric Higbee by getting the full show notes for this episode at www.DerateTheHate.com.Ā
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
Send Wilk a text with your feedback! (incoming msgs only - I can't reply)
The End of Solitude, Culture, and the Fight for Individuality
In this episode of Derate The Hate, host Wilk Wilkinson sits down with award-winning essayist, cultural critic, and author William Deresiewicz for an insightful conversation on solitude, the internetās impact on society, political polarization, and the importance of civic engagement in an increasingly fragmented world.
William Deresiewicz is the author of The End of Solitude: Selected Essays on Culture and Society, a powerful collection that examines how digital technology has reshaped our relationships, eroded genuine human connection, and deepened societal divides. As a former Yale and Columbia professor and an influential voice in cultural criticism, Bill brings a unique perspective on individuality, self-examination, and the need for real community in an age dominated by online interactions.
Key Takeaways from this Episode:
ā
The Importance of Solitude: How the internet has altered our relationship with solitude and why reclaiming it is essential for deep thinking and self-awareness.
ā
The Internet & Society: The ways in which digital technology has reshaped our social interactions, often leading to community decay, polarization, and dehumanization.
ā
Political Polarization & Self-Examination: How emotional investment in beliefs fuels division and why intellectual humility is critical for a healthier civic discourse.
ā
Civic Engagement as an Antidote to Online Toxicity: The role of real-world community-building in counteracting the negative effects of social media-driven discourse.
ā
Pro-Human Philosophy: As a new member of the ProHuman Foundationās Board of Advisors, Bill discusses the need to reinforce individuality and shared humanity in todayās divided culture.
ā
The Future of Culture & Identity: Why people are growing dissatisfied with extreme ideological divides and how embracing nuanced, human-centered discussions can lead to positive change.
Learn more About William Deresiewicz in the full show notes for this episode at DerateTheHate.com
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
Send Wilk a text with your feedback! (incoming msgs only - I can't reply)
Breaking the Cycle: Trauma, Emotional Intelligence and Rewriting Human Connection
Here at the DTH podcast, we donāt just talk about division, anger, and outrageāwe focus on solutions, on healing, on finding common ground in a world that so often feels fractured.
Today, I have the privilege of sitting down with someone who understands that journey firsthand. Brandon Bishop is not just an advocate for emotional intelligenceāheās a disruptor, a visionary, and the founder of TrueEQ, a movement dedicated to redefining human connection. Brandonās life has been shaped by deep trauma, by emotional isolation, and by a society that often values status over substance. But instead of letting that define him, heās used it as fuelāto build a platform that challenges the very systems that keep us disconnected.
His story is raw. Raised in an emotionally barren home, perfectionism became his survival mechanism. But over time, he saw through the rigid ideologiesāwhether religious, corporate, or socialāthat prioritize control over compassion. And that realization led him to a new mission: to help others break free, reclaim their worth, and build relationships rooted in self-awareness, resilience, and radical authenticity.
Through TrueEQ, Brandon is creating something differentāan intentional social network that isnāt about algorithms, clout, or ego, but about real human connection. He believes that emotional intelligence is the key to personal growth, meaningful relationships, and ultimately, a better society. And heās not just talking about itāheās doing something about it, building a space for those who are willing to step beyond the noise, lean into vulnerability, and rewrite the rules of connection.
Takeaways
Learn more about and connect with Brandon Bishop by getting the full show notes at DerateTheHate.com
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
Send Wilk a text with your feedback! (incoming msgs only - I can't reply)
Censorship in the Arts and the Fight For Free Expression
Todayās episode is part of our ProHuman Foundation Board of Advisors series, where we have been highlighting voices committed to promoting our shared humanity, open dialogue, and diverse perspectives.
My guest today is someone who embodies those values in her work and advocacy. Rosie Kay is an internationally renowned dancer and choreographer whose career has taken her across the world, using the power of movement to explore deep societal issues. Sheās the founder of K2CO and Freedom in the Arts, a vital organization dedicated to protecting artistic freedom and defending artists against cancel culture.
Rosie is also a fellow board advisor for the ProHuman Foundation, where we work alongside other thought leaders to push back against the growing culture of division. Her own journey in the arts has come with its challengesāparticularly as political ideologies and conformity have taken hold in creative spaces. Sheās been at the center of debates on gender ideology, free expression, and the role of self-discipline in art, and today, weāre diving into all of it.
Weāll explore how self-censorship is creeping into the arts, why gender ideology is impacting womenās rights and spaces, and why open debate is essential for understanding one another. Rosieās perspective is a powerful reminder that courage, resilience, and a return to shared humanity are more important than ever.
Takeaways
Learn more about and connect with Rosie Kay by getting the full show notes at DerateTheHate.com
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
Send Wilk a text with your feedback! (incoming msgs only - I can't reply)
The Transformative Power of Forgiveness: Unlocking Healing and Resilience
Today weāre diving back into a topic that I believe is fundamental to personal growth, emotional healing, and resilience: forgiveness.
Now, we all hear that word a lotāpeople say, āJust forgive, forget and move on,ā like itās some quick decision, a one-time event. But my guest today, Katharine Giovanni, knows firsthand that forgiveness isnāt a destinationāitās a process, a journey, and sometimes, the hardest step weāll ever take.
Katharine is a three-time award-winning, best-selling author, a dynamic speaker, and a highly sought-after forgiveness coach. Beyond the accolades, what makes Katharine truly stand out is her personal story of resilience. From surviving stage 3 breast cancer to overcoming a traumatic childhood, sheās lived through experiences that many would call unforgivableāand yet, sheās found a way to move forward, not just surviving, but thriving.
Her latest book, The Ultimate Path to Forgiveness: Unlocking Your Power, is a game-changer because it doesnāt just tell you to forgiveāit shows you how with a step-by-step approach.Ā
Takeaways from our conversation today: Ā
Learn more about and connect with Katharine GiovanniĀ by getting the full show notes for this episode at DerateTheHate.com
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
Send Wilk a text with your feedback! (incoming msgs only - I can't reply)
Do You Want Revenge or Do You Want a Better America?
Today, I have the privilege of welcoming back award-winning filmmaker, writer, and storyteller, Eli Steele. Eli is known for films like How Jack Became Black, Whatās Bugging Seth, and most recently, What Killed Michael Brown?āa powerful and thought-provoking documentary he produced with his father, Shelby Steele. He also shares his insights on his Man of Steele Substack, where he continues challenging narratives and pushing for deeper discussions on race, identity, and the American experience.
Eli and I dive into one of the most pressing issues facing our country todayāthe growing desire for revenge in our political and cultural landscape. Too often, we see frustration turning into retribution, but where does that really lead us? Do we move forward as a nation by tearing each other down, or is there a better pathāone rooted in accountability, responsibility, and reconciliation?
Weāll talk about how history has shaped the current racial and political climate, why the victimhood mentality is so destructive, and how the cycle of revenge only deepens division. Through the powerful Tar Baby analogy, weāll explore how getting stuck in anger and resentment holds us back from real progress.Ā
This is a conversation about moving beyond identity politics, beyond blame, and beyond the toxic cycles that keep us from truly thriving.
Takeaways
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
Send Wilk a text with your feedback! (incoming msgs only - I can't reply)
The Exponential Power of Gratitude: Unleashing Your Happiness EquationĀ
Let me ask you: How do you measure happiness? Is it something you chase, or something you cultivate?Ā What if I told you thereās an actual equation for happiness? A way to measure it, understand it, and most importantly, optimize it? Thatās exactly what todayās guest, Leighton Campbell, has uncovered in his latest book, Your Happiness Equation.
Leighton is a devoted husband, father of four, successful entrepreneur, and passionate reader who has traveled the world in search of deeper meaning and fulfillment. Through his journey, heās identified seven key variables that shape our happinessābut thereās one element that doesnāt just add to the equationāit amplifies it: Gratitude.
In fact, gratitude isnāt just another piece of the puzzleāitās the exponent. It strengthens every other factor in the equation, multiplying its impact on your well-being. Want more peace? More purpose? More fulfillment? Gratitude magnifies all of it. And today, Leighton is going to break down exactly how that works.
Weāll also explore the difference between fleeting joy and lasting happiness, the power of self-awareness, and why chasing the wrong things can actually lead to less happiness. And for those wondering where they stand, Leightonās got a happiness quiz that will help you assess your own equation.
Takeaways
Learn more about and connect with Leighton Campbell by getting the full show notes at DerateTheHate.com.
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
Send Wilk a text with your feedback! (incoming msgs only - I can't reply)
Mastering Resilience and Emotional Intelligence Through StorytellingĀ
My guest today is the incredible Madelaine Claire Weiss. Sheās a Harvard-trained psychotherapist, mindset expert, and board-certified executive coach. With a background that spans corporate leadership, education, and mental health, Madelaine has dedicated her career to helping people navigate lifeās challenges with clarity and confidence.
Sheās the bestselling author of Getting to G.R.E.A.T.: A 5-Step Strategy for Work and Life, which breaks down a powerful framework for personal and professional success. And now, sheās bringing that wisdom to young minds with her new book, Whatās Your Story?āa personal development workbook for kids featuring a character named Brainy, who helps children understand how their minds work and how they can take control of their own narratives.
In this conversation, weāll explore the role of storytelling in resilience, why emotional intelligence is key to making better decisions, and how parents can equip their children with the coping skills they need to thrive. Weāll also break down her G-R-E-A-T frameworkāgrounding, recognizing, exploring, taking action, and tackling resistanceāand how it can help all of us lead happier, more fulfilling lives.
Takeaways
Learn more about and connect with Madelaine Claire Weiss online by getting the full show notes at www.DerateTheHate.com
The world is a better place if we are better people. Be grateful for all youāve got. Make every day the day that you want it to be!
Please follow the DTH podcast on:
Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , Ā YouTube, Ā SubstackĀ
Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact
The Derate The Hate podcast is proudly produced in collaboration with Braver Angels ā Americaās largest grassroots, cross-partisan organization working toward civic renewal and bridging partisan divides. Learn more: BraverAngels.org
Welcome to the Derate The Hate Podcast!
*The views expressed by Wilk, his guest hosts &/or guests on the Derate The Hate podcast are their own and should not be attributed to any organization they may otherwise be affiliated with.
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