Doing Life with Ken and Tabatha

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Marriages don't break overnight, and they aren't restored in a day either. In this raw and revealing conversation, Ken and Tabatha share the five transformative keys that saved their once-broken relationship and built the foundation for their marriage journey.

"Locate where you are" begins their practical framework—because you can't navigate to Macy's without first finding the "You Are Here" dot on the mall directory. This honest self-assessment creates the starting point for genuine change. From there, the couple dismantles the myth that you should "work on yourself first" before addressing your marriage, showing how personal growth and relationship building must happen simultaneously.

The conversation takes a powerful turn when Tabitha reveals her "jujitsu approach" to winning Ken's heart during their darkest season. Rather than matching his distance with her own withdrawal, she chose selfless love—preparing meals he wouldn't eat, showing affection he initially rejected—until her consistent kindness broke through his defenses in ways confrontation never could.

You'll hear their passionate plea to remove "divorce" from your vocabulary, including the moving story of a couple who literally cut the word from their family dictionary during their wedding ceremony. And finally, they share the cornerstone of their restoration: putting God at the center of everything.

Whether you're fighting to save a troubled marriage or seeking to strengthen a good one, these battle-tested principles offer both hope and practical pathways forward. As Ken and Tabatha remind us, sometimes the greatest victories come when we fight not with our flesh, but with our faith.

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...

Send us Fan Mail

The secret weapon sitting on your shelf might be collecting dust. When was the last time you actually opened your Bible and studied it with purpose? In this powerful conversation, Ken and Tabatha tackle one of the most fundamental yet overlooked aspects of Christian life - how to develop a meaningful relationship with Scripture.

Christians often struggle with Bible study, feeling intimidated by ancient text or unsure how to extract relevant meaning for today's challenges. Both hosts candidly share their early experiences with Scripture - from falling asleep mid-verse to treating the Bible like a history textbook rather than living revelation. Their breakthrough came not through rigid discipline but through supernatural activation of the Holy Spirit, transforming words on a page into divine encounters.

The conversation moves beyond theory into practical application with five essential keys for effective Bible study: starting small with quality over quantity, using frameworks like SOAP (Scripture, Observation, Application, Prayer), establishing rhythm rather than rules, utilizing tools that match your learning style, and most critically, inviting the Holy Spirit's illumination. They emphasize that Scripture serves as our offensive spiritual weapon - the sword that cuts through depression, doubt, and spiritual warfare when wielded properly.

What makes this episode particularly valuable is the balanced approach to traditional and modern study methods. While honoring the tactile experience of paper Bibles with highlights and notes, they also embrace digital resources and audio versions for different learning styles. The hosts create space for both structured and free-spirited approaches to Scripture engagement, acknowledging that different seasons of life require adaptable strategies.

Ready to transform your relationship with God's Word? Listen now, and discover how to move beyond surface-level reading into life-changing revelation that powers every area of your life.

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...

Send us Fan Mail

The way you talk to yourself matters more than you might realize. Have you ever caught yourself saying things to your own reflection that you'd never dream of saying to someone else? In this deeply personal episode, we explore the transformative power of extending "Grace to Self" and how this simple practice can revolutionize your mental, spiritual, and even physical wellbeing.

Through vulnerable storytelling, we share the moment when a divine interruption challenged years of harsh self-criticism with a powerful question: "Who are you talking to like that? That's my daughter." This confrontation sparked a healing journey that not only transformed negative thought patterns but actually resulted in physical healing from an autoimmune condition. You'll discover how the war we wage against ourselves through our thoughts can manifest in our bodies—and how declaring peace can begin restoration.

We dive deep into seven practical keys for extending grace to yourself, from choosing self-forgiveness to developing healthy self-talk practices. For those struggling with perfectionism, religious guilt, or the constant feeling that you're never doing enough, this episode offers liberating insights about embracing your humanity while still pursuing growth. Whether you battle with negative self-image, impossible standards, or difficulty forgiving your own mistakes, you'll find practical wisdom for breaking free from self-condemnation.

Ready to stop being your own harshest critic? Join us as we explore how treating yourself with the same kindness, understanding, and forgiveness you'd offer to others can become the gateway to experiencing deeper joy, freedom, and spiritual wholeness. Your journey toward grace begins now.

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...

Send us Fan Mail

We explore God's design for intimacy within marriage and share eight essential principles for newlyweds navigating sexual expectations versus reality after the wedding day.

• Understanding God's purpose for sex: procreation, enjoyment, and intimacy between husband and wife
• Recognizing that great intimacy takes time, communication, and patience to develop
• Being patient with the journey rather than expecting instant perfection
• Communicating clearly and often about desires, preferences, and boundaries
• Inviting God into every aspect of your marriage, including the bedroom
• Focusing on connection beyond just physical pleasure
• Addressing and releasing unhelpful expectations from past experiences
• Overcoming insecurity and comparison for greater vulnerability
• Protecting intimacy with intentional boundaries against distractions
• Continuously learning and growing together through resources and conversation
• Approaching intimacy with tenderness, focusing on your spouse's experience
• Scheduling regular times for connection rather than leaving it to chance

Share this episode with anyone who is dating, engaged, newly married, or could use biblical insight on building a fulfilling intimate life with their spouse.

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...

Send us Fan Mail

Struggling with dating in today's confusing landscape? Ken and Tabatha draw from their marriage to deliver straight-talking wisdom about what actually works in relationships. 

"You got to be friends first," Ken emphasizes, highlighting how many couples rush into relationships without genuinely liking each other. This foundation of friendship—actually enjoying each other's company—creates the energy that sustains love through challenging seasons.

The hosts don't shy away from addressing physical attraction, timing important conversations, and maintaining standards while dating. "Know your worth and don't give discounts," becomes their rallying cry against settling for less than you deserve.

Their practical advice extends to relationship red flags too—like being "pressed" or desperate, looking for someone to complete you, giving too much too fast, playing house before marriage, and putting yourself in compromising positions. Each point is illustrated with relatable stories and insights from their ministry experience.

Most powerfully, they address the spiritual foundation necessary for lasting relationships. "Don't be unequally yoked with unbelievers," they caution, explaining how mismatched spiritual values can create lifelong challenges that even the most devoted partner can't overcome.

Whether you're navigating the early stages of dating or preparing for marriage, this episode provides a blueprint for building relationships that stand the test of time. Ready to transform your approach to dating? This conversation might just change how you view relationships forever.

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...

Send us Fan Mail

What happens when the unthinkable creeps into your relationship? The answers might surprise you. After counseling countless couples through the aftermath of infidelity, we've discovered that affairs rarely "just happen" – they're the result of small compromises that accumulate over time.

Drawing from both personal and professional experience, we reveal how good people can make devastating choices when they fail to establish proper boundaries. Our own marriage has weathered significant storms over 25 years, and we've learned that preventing infidelity requires intentional guardrails long before temptation strikes.

The episode explores common pathways that lead to affairs: emotional disconnection, unmet needs, loneliness within marriage, personal brokenness, revenge, crisis situations, and simple selfishness. We break down the progression from innocent interaction to full-blown affair, revealing how adultery always begins in the heart.

Most importantly, we share ten practical strategies for affair-proofing your relationship, including guarding your heart and mind, daily investment in emotional intimacy, maintaining a vibrant sexual connection, setting firm boundaries with the opposite sex, practicing complete transparency, surrounding yourself with pro-marriage friends, dealing quickly with conflict, and making God the center of your relationship.

Whether you're newlyweds or celebrating decades together, these principles provide concrete protection against one of marriage's greatest threats. The stakes couldn't be higher – as we explain, the consequences of infidelity go far beyond momentary pleasure, potentially destroying your family, reputation, and decades of shared history.

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...

Send us Fan Mail

What critical questions should you ask before saying "I do"? With half of all marriages ending in divorce despite everyone believing theirs will last forever, these three game-changing questions could save your relationship from becoming another statistic.

The marriage journey transforms us in ways we never anticipate. The first essential question recognizes this reality: "Can you handle me changing?" That vibrant 23-year-old you fell in love with will inevitably become a different person at 43 and 63. Many of us marry an image rather than a real person—attracted to their current appearance, ambitions, or how they make us feel—without considering the transformation that decades bring. Whether it's physical changes after children, shifting career goals, or evolving priorities, marriage requires love that transcends these natural evolutions.

Equally important is the counterpoint: "Can you handle me not changing?" We often enter marriage with a subconscious desire to mold our partner into versions of ourselves. That spouse who struggles with punctuality, plays video games excessively, or approaches finances differently may never fundamentally change these traits. Before marriage, become a "fruit inspector"—carefully examining consistent patterns and honestly asking if you can accept those unchangeable aspects for a lifetime. Many relationships deteriorate because one spouse continuously pressures the other to become someone they're not designed to be.

Finally, ask: "Will you love me when you don't like me?" Every marriage experiences seasons where affection wanes and irritation grows, yet commitment must remain. Many couples mistake the temporary butterflies of the infatuation stage (typically lasting three months to three years) for the foundation of marriage. Real love chooses connection even during difficult seasons and finds ways to rebuild fondness through intentional efforts.

These questions highlight why physical intimacy before marriage can cloud judgment about fundamental compatibility issues. The emotional bonds created through sex often lead people to overlook critical differences that become relationship-breaking problems after marriage.

Take time to honestly explore these three questions with your partner. Your willingness to face these realities now could make the difference between a marriage that thrives through decades of change and one that joins the sobering divorce statistics.

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...

Send us Fan Mail

Authenticity is becoming increasingly rare in our carefully curated world. While many struggle to present perfect images of themselves online and offline, Ken and Tabatha tackle the transformative power of radical honesty.

They introduce the HOT principle—Honest, Open, Transparent—as the foundation for truly meaningful relationships, whether in marriage, friendship, business, or ministry. "I don't understand why people portray themselves as something they're not," Ken reflects, challenging listeners to examine their own commitment to truth.

Throughout the conversation, they explore how dishonesty creates fractures in trust that eventually break relationships apart. "Without honesty, you don't have trust, and without trust, you don't have a relationship," Tabitha emphasizes. The spiritual implications are profound too—lying literally aligns us with what scripture calls "the father of lies" while truthfulness reflects God's character.

For singles, they offer straight-talking advice: put honesty near the top of your list when looking for a spouse, second only to loving God. For marrieds, they discuss how even withholding truth damages intimacy. For parents, they suggest practical ways to teach children the value of honesty without resorting to "white lies" about Santa or storks.

The episode concludes with five practical steps to grow in honesty: get honest with yourself first, speak truth in love, release fear of rejection, practice small honest acts daily, and invite accountability through safe conversations. Ken shares a powerful personal story about correcting a $1,000 billing error, demonstrating how choosing honesty—even when costly—yields greater rewards than monetary gain.

Ready to become more authentic in your relationships? Listen now, then share with someone who needs this message. Subscribe to get new episodes every Thursday at 3pm!

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...

Send us Fan Mail

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...

Send us Fan Mail

📖 ORDER BETTER MARRIAGE!
Ready to build a stronger, healthier marriage? Order our new book, Better Marriage: Perfect Love for Imperfect Couples, by Ken & Tabatha Claytor. ❤️
👉 Order your copy here:
https://www.amazon.com/Better-Marriage-Perfect-Imperfect-Couples/dp/B0GNDV9MTW

GET BUILD TO LAST PREMARITAL COURSE HERE:
Your wedding lasts one day. Your marriage lasts a lifetime.
Build to Last Premarital Course: https://kenandtabatha.com/built-to-last


GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/5326

Support Our Ministry: 
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.co...