Loving BDSM

Don’t Put Your Dominant on a Pedestal LB020


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Kayla Lords hosts this week’s show, and she’s discussing the very real truth that Dominants are (gasp!) not perfect, prone to normal human flaws, and shouldn’t be put up on a pedestal by submissives – no matter how great a Dominant they may be.
In this episode:

* Kayla was reminded just how perfectly imperfect John Brownstone is and shares her silly teasing.
* Dominants are people and will do things that don’t always seem “Dominant” – very vanilla, normal things.
* John Brownstone is an amazing man and Dominant, but he’s not perfect.
* When a submissive puts their Dominant up on a pedestal and believes they can do no wrong, the only place for a Dominant to go is down.
* One problem with pedestals is that submissives are devastated the first time their Dominant makes a big mistake, thinking that somehow their Dominant is “less than perfect” for the first time.
* The second problem is that some submissives will allow the uneducated or the really bad Dominants to get away with bad behavior because they (falsely) believe their Dominants can do no wrong.
* Kayla has three tips for preventing the pedestal situation: time and experience, communication (and lots of it), and plenty of humor. Learn to laugh at their very human frailties.
* John Brownstone is the perfect Dominant for Kayla without the need for a pedestal, even with the mistakes, oops, and uh-ohs in their relationship. A good Dominant can be perfect for you without being a perfect person.

Sponsorships are available for any kinky or erotic businesses looking to reach a new audience. Contact Kayla for more details and rates.
Topic suggestions and questions are always welcome from listeners. Contact Kayla or John, and you’ll receive a personal response. If your question or suggestion is used in an upcoming episode, your anonymity is guaranteed.
Listen on YouTube:

Full Transcript:
You’re listening to Loving BDSM podcast: episode 20. Hey, everybody. Kayla Lords here discussing Dominants and the pedestals we submissives put them on! Welcome to the Loving BDSM podcast. If this is your first time listening, glad to have you! If you’re back for another week, welcome back! Loving BDSM is produced every Friday for your kinky pleasure and education and show notes are found at kaylalords.com. Come back often and feel free to add the podcast to your favorite RSS feed or iTunes. If you love what you hear, we’d love a good review on iTunes to help other kinksters find us! You can follow me on Twitter @KaylaLords or stalk John Brownstone at southernsirsplace.com. All links are in the show notes.
A reminder for any kinky, sexy, or erotic business types out there – sponsorships are available. Since we’re still a baby podcast, rates are reasonable. Contact me at kayla lords at gmail dot com for information.
I have a confession to make. I told John Brownstone, my sweet and sadistic Daddy, that sometimes he was more vanilla than a vanilla bean.
I thought it was funny. I think he was a little horrified. Okay, it was really freaking funny.
He’d done what I consider a stereotypically man thing. He’d let his attention wander while we were talking, and when I asked him a question in course of the conversation, all I got back was a “Huh?”
If this happened on a more regular basis, I’d probably be annoyed by it. But it made me laugh because it was so stereotypical and a little unlike him. Only a little.
It was also a good reminder that no matter how kinky we are or we want to be,
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