The Art Of Coaching

E231 | How to Craft the Perfect Apology


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“I’m sorry.”

Depending on the context, these can be some of the hardest words to say.  

Whether it’s because emotions are running high, you aren’t sure what you’re sorry for (but you feel it’s what the other party wants to hear), or any number of other conflict resolution scenarios, these words often get used and abused, making their impact dull or unintentional.

In today’s episode, we define and address the do’s and don’ts of conversational repair, and reveal some common case studies showing the use of these tactics in real life situations.  Some of the core principles discussed include:

  • Using an apology as a starting point - the beginning of a new set of behaviors (11:10)
  • Having the right timing (12:25)
  • Knowing when or how an apology will actually make things worse (13:40)
  • How to not over-apologize (16:35)
  • These are meant to help you formulate a research - backed game plan when going into these types of high risk conversations, so that you can avoid the unintentional consequences that so often occur.

    Because the fact is that apologies are a messy part of life and leadership, and they will always be required at some level. 

    Listed below are the materials referenced in this week’s episode:

    • Article reference (15:20): When Saying Sorry May Not Help
  • Art of Coaching Podcast (29:10): E126: Eight Obstacles to Building Buy-In & E207: How Perception Impacts Communication and Relationships
  • Art of Coaching Podcast (37:00): E63: Power Dynamics in Leadership & E202: Why Facts and Logic Don't Change Our Minds
  • Questions? Follow this link to ask us! (45:45)
  • Today’s podcast is brought to you by our awesome sponsors, Momentous and DFND.

    Momentous: Whether you’re an elite athlete, weekend warrior or just looking to improve your everyday health / performance, check out their entire line of protein and supplements at livemomentous.com and use code BRETT15 at checkout for 15% off! My personal favorites are their fish oil and magnesium, both of which I attribute to my better sleep and recovery. 

    DFND: As our official compression partner, DFND is engineered to help anyone who loves to train and compete go harder longer, recover quicker, and get better faster. Their first line of compression wear was tested on special forces trainees under the harshest training conditions in the world, but now they’re worn by athletes at all levels and anyone serious about performance. Use code: AOC20 to get 20% off your order.

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    The Art Of CoachingBy Brett Bartholomew

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