Swinging the pendulum from sacred to profane, as is our wont, this episode runs the gamut from existential crisis born of bicycle thievery...to matter-of-fact categorizing of unfortunate skin conditions, such as furuncles, boils, wart, and corns. Fasten your seatbelts. It's going to be a bumpy year.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Pearl Jams, epileptic orgasms, and other sex stuff

- The ongoing adventures of Allen Wrench, P.I.

- A lesson in distinguishing between "raspberrying" and "motorboating"

- Teat suckling modes of transportation

- Tasty treats, like wall spaghetti and corn pads

It's been a long December, and there's reason to believe...maybe this *something-that-rhymes-with-"round bouncing ball of marsupials"* will be better than the last. Candi and Jason Vincent, of Pranksgiving 2020 fame, are up in the canyons for our *something-that-rhymes-with-"ghost's-occupation"* episode, and GAMES are afoot! Or anose. Or akidney stone. Something Operation-related.

Other discussion topics may include:

- The sudden realization that you have an IMDB page

- Washing the hair of a TV male British housekeeper

- The Brittle of San Francisco, starring Almond Rocca

- Paper baggery, magnetic hair, dead brain spots, and other means of physical self improvement

- The very slim possibility this episode may begin a war with Russia

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, which means guests! games! ... and gas? Let our leading extra, Gennie Adams, jingle your bells with baking stories (both weed and culinary), OnlyFans ASMR, and the filthiest anagrams known to Baby Jesus. 

Other conversation topics may include:

- How to feign interest in what your podcast co-host is saying

- What is the world's hottest food? Spoiler: It's a pot pie

- Telepathically summoning children, and other Santa Claus creepiness

- Erectile dysfunction pill advent calendars...which isn't even a joke, it turns out

- Perfectly reusable prerecorded season ridicules. Our gift to you.

Let's get intimate, shall we? Are you a rowdy sleeper and wake up with limbs all akimbo and pillows strewn all over the bed and whole asscrack hanging out, like Doug? Or are you a vampire and sleep on your back with your arms crossed on your chest and wake your partner up by laughing in your sleep, like Alice (and Captain Holt from Brooklyn Nine-Nine)?

Tune in for further fascinating discussions on lucid dreaming, night demons, and bed head. (Is "bedhead" one word or two? Do they mean different things depending on which...if you know what I mean?)

Other discussion topics may include:

- Oral folding instructions for underwear origami

- An unnecessary indictment of the fine people of Santa Fe

- A host of alarming impressions of alarms from the hosts

- How late is too late to begin a new format on your podcast?

- A nostalgic look at the commando movement

DISCLAIMER: Listening to this podcast and/or interacting with its social media accounts may produce feelings of euphoria, existential mania, and incurable shame-pride. Recent studies show that it may also cause impotence, stupidity, loss of imagination, and general human difficulty. It is not a substitute for regular medical visits, social interaction, and legitimate educational pursuits.

Other discussion topics may include:

- The unexpected time suck that is Family Feud's customization options

- A behind the scenes look at Going Terribly's episodic "filth quota"

- The hurtfulness of a follicular slur

- Protagonists, antagonists, and Pat Sajak's wife

- A belated celebration of Pretend You're a Time Traveler Day, which will have happened tomorrow

It's almost Alice and Doug's anniversary of the couplins. AND WHY DOES AUTOCORRECT REFUSE TO LET ME SPELL IT THAT WAY?!?!?!

Anyway, they'll celebrate with some high art and low balls and of course, swordfuls of meat brought to their table at regular intervals.

Other discussion topics may include:

- The pure art and sheer brilliance of a sideways urinal

- How pockets should be far more respected in modern society (stop making fun of cargo shorts)

- The fascinating link between Mark Twain, Halley's Comet, and ho trains

- Learn about a bologna that you wouldn't be ashamed to eat

- The birth of rock and roll, and then whatever Dave Matthews turned it into

Have you ever served on a jury? Do you know anyone who has? What about in a restaurant test market or a Gallup poll or the survey of 100 people on Family Feud? Does anyone know anybody who's ever responded to any allegedly significant public opinion research ever? WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE WHO HOLD OUR LIVES IN THEIR HANDS?!?!?!

Alice was rejected for Jury Duty again, and Doug unearths a conspiracy about false celebrity birthdays. WE'RE ALL STUCK IN A SIMULATION!!!!

Other discussion topics may include:

- Stasis Mom: The video game that will make Going Terribly and Fountains of Wayne millions

- Groundhog Day and the movies and shows it inspired

- Celebrities obtaining cake through nefarious means

- Some dogs have human names, some killers have three names...so what happens if a dog has three human names?

- Groundhog Day and the movies and shows it inspired

If all of our episode titles didn't have to strictly follow (split infinitive FTW!) the "Two Peas in a Pod" format, we'd call this one "In Loaf and Breadsketball."

Get cozy as we riff on dough balls, the NRA (the NBA one), and the etymological legacy of Hitler's Germany.

Other discussion topics may include:

- A well bred breadth of breaded bread

- The professional wrestling legacy of Millard Fillmore

- How to correctly and incorrectly pronounced a lot of words...though you'll have to figure out which is which

- A joke that would make the Beach Boys regret ever singing a note

- Queens of Goths, Legends of Zelda, and Moppers of Floors

To Alice on Her 37th Birthday... That movie allusion FINALLY makes sense!

Other discussion topics may include:

- Listen, it's Alice's birthday. You don't need any other reasons to listen to this episode. It's her freaking birthday. Be a pal and listen. She's pretty awesome. 

[This shameless plea brought to you by Doug, Intern Sean, and Alfredo]

It's November, and you know what that means. It's the season of food and togetherness, paranoid Covid scares, reinforcing of gender roles, and figuring out once and for all, what the heck happened to that guy from Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch. You know, that lead singer guy.

Other discussion topics may include:

- NPR vs. Australia: The Great War of 2020

- A celebration of the world's #2 #2 museum

- The joy of an artificially purple dog and the concern over a naturally purple dog

- Fantasy basketball drafts vs. Beauty pageants: a very shallow analysis

- Eggy farts and potato salad poop. You know, the classy stuff.