Renew You with Quinn Kelly

How to Deal with Family Tension at Holidays


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Discover the way ahead at Indiana Wesleyan University. Learn more here.



In today’s podcast, Quinn addresses how to reduce or prevent family tension at holiday gatherings because it’s something that is normal for so many, but something so many don’t know how to change.  

The point of this podcast is to help you work to make your holiday gatherings less stressful and more enjoyable and aligned with honoring God. In the episode, Quinn offers listeners 7 things to avoid which include: 

7 Don’ts to Prevent Family Tension:

  • Don’t call someone out in front of the family.  
  • Don’t wait to have a hard conversation at a family gathering. Save them for before or after. 
  • Do not over-drink or overindulge. 
  • Don’t respect the host house. 
  • Don’t be upset when someone sets a boundary. Respect it. 
  • Don’t leave children unattended.  
  • Don’t show favoritism toward grand kids.  
  • 4 Things to Prevent Tension as A Host 

    • As the host, tell people your schedule.  
    • If someone isn’t responding, reach out to them and ask: 
    • What can I do to make you more comfortable?  
    • Create spaces of retreat. 
    • Offer fun activities for different types of people – the introverts and extroverts.  
    • 3 Things to do to Stop Continued Hurt or Family Tension

      • Set realistic expectations.  
      • If you need to communicate, figure out what needs to be said to make things the most ideal. Change the pattern. Change the system.  
      • Look for moments to connect instead of moments to criticize. And have fun! 
      • Scripture Renewal Tip:

        Ephesians 5 

        Mind Renewal Tip:

        God loves families. He desires us to seek healthy relationships because it brings heaven to earth.



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