How To! with Charles Duhigg

When Elle started a new career as a therapist, she never imagined she would be the one in need of help. After just a few months, her position at a group practice became untenable amid a lack of support from colleagues. Now she's looking for a new job and wants to avoid a similar scenario. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace introduces Elle to leadership coach Rudhir Krishtel, who helps us rethink our relationships to co-workers—and work itself.

How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrea.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

How do you learn to tell the perfect joke? In this special edition of How To!, founding host Charles Duhigg joins Courtney and Carvell to mark five years of life-changing advice with a look back at our very first episode. It features a pastor from Oklahoma who wants to spice up his sermons. We introduce him to Gary Gulman, a New York standup comedian who makes jokes about his clinical depression. They workshop the pastor's new joke about the New Testament, and Gary reveals "what might be the most important rule of being funny."

Charles Duhigg's favorite episode: How To Stop Being Anxious

Courtney Martin's favorite episode: How To Be Lonely

Carvell Wallace's favorite episode: How To Grieve an Estranged Parent

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrae.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Todd is looking for love, but he's unsure about disclosing something in dating profiles: his multiple sclerosis. With symptoms that are increasingly visible, Todd feels compelled to be upfront about his disability with potential dates—but he doesn't know when or how to discuss it. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on Jessica Slice and Caroline Cupp, authors of Dateable: Swiping Right, Hooking Up, and Settling Down While Chronically Ill and Disabled. They give Todd guidance on having that talk, navigating ableism, and managing his own internal expectations.

If you liked this episode check out: How To Flirt With Confidence

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrae.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Shirley Showalter and Marilyn McEntyre know that grandparenting is more than just cookies and Play-Doh. Don't get us wrong, those things are fun! But the art of contemporary grandparenting requires mindfulness, intentionality, and navigating boundaries. On today's episode, Courtney Martin talks with Marilyn and Shirley about their book, The Mindful Grandparent, and the wisdom they've gained as elders to 12 grandchildren.

If you liked this episode check out: How To Face Your Kid's Future

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrea.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Trisha is craving a break from her job, but she doesn't want to drain her bank account. On today's episode, Courtney Martin connects Trisha to DJ DiDonna, founder of The Sabbatical Project, who's on a quest to make extended breaks accessible to all. DJ explains how to plan for a sabbatical that is both meaningful and manageable.

If you liked this episode check out: How To Hit "Reset" On Your Career.

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sara McCrea.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

David was in the ocean in Hawaii when the unthinkable happened—a shark attacked him and bit off his leg. "I don't think you're gonna make it," a medic told the 25-year-old on the helicopter ride to the hospital. But David did make it, and soon he learned that surviving the shark wasn't the hardest part—it was what came after. On this episode of How To!, we bring in Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, psychiatrist and author of The Body Keeps the Score, to help David understand and deal with the lasting psychological trauma of the attack. For anyone suffering from severe trauma, Bessel says, it's okay to grieve the person you were before. Accepting the loss of the "old you" will allow you to better embrace who you are now, both in your mind and body.

Do you need help overcoming life's many challenges? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show.

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Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

How To!'s senior editor Joel Meyer recently experienced a yard sale fail and wants to know what went wrong. He spent hours planning and organizing the items on his lawn, but when it was all said and done he barely made enough to cover the cost of lunch. Enter this week's expert, Ava Seavey, a self-described master of garage-sale-ology and author of Ava's Guide to Garage Sale Gold. Seavey tells host Courtney Martin some hilarious stories and insider tips for how to cash in on all your old stuff.

If you liked this episode, check out "How To Find the Gems in All Your Junk"

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

Podcast production by Derek John, Joel Meyer, Rosemary Belson, and Kevin Bendis.

Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Meg once was a terror in the world of roller derby. But these days, her sedentary lifestyle is making everyday physical activities a tad daunting. (We're looking at you, groceries that need to be carried up four flights of stairs!). She wants to start lifting weights, but she's unsure where to start—and whether she can avoid the bro-culture of many weight rooms. On this episode of How To!: Courtney Martin brings in writer and powerlifter Mikala Jamison, who was in Meg's shoes not that long ago. She shares how she got started, why lifting is a lifelong journey, and what we can learn from the current zeitgeist for women's strength training.

Resources mentioned:

Mikala's Substack, Body Type

Book with simple lifting guide

Fitness trainer Meg Gallagher on Instagram

If you liked this episode check out: How To Be Free Of Body Shame or How To Stick to Your New Year's Resolutions

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson and Kevin Bendis.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

After Lin met Dave, their lives quickly became entangled. Lin joined Dave's small business, made much-needed improvements, and charmed Dave's family. The two also began a romantic relationship that lasted years. When it fizzled, Lin continued working at the company—and eventually uncovered Dave's lies, deceit, and infidelity. On this episode of How To!: Carvell Wallace welcomes Nina Renata Aron, author of Good Morning, Destroyer of Men's Souls, to share her own experience exiting a toxic, codependent relationship and explain how she came to terms with it.

If you liked this episode check out: How To Do Divorce Right and How To Forgive Someone Who Isn't Sorry

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson and Kevin Bendis.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Paula has a big family, lots of friends, and a girlfriend she adores. For most of her life, however, she has experienced an underlying and unshakeable sense of loneliness. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Kristen Radtke, the writer and illustrator behind Seek You: A Journey Through American Loneliness, to talk with Paula about an emotion that's hard to talk about—and even harder to confront.

If you liked this episode, check out How To Find Your People and How To Survive a Silent Retreat.

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

How To! is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. Derek John is our executive producer.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.