What emotional relationships with chatbots reveal about loneliness, safety, and the fear of real intimacy

Someone recently said their AI companion understands them more than their actual partner. That it listens, responds with care, and never judges. For them, it felt like love. But is it?

In this episode of This Complex Life, I’m looking at the growing number of people forming emotional connections with chatbots. Some call it companionship. Some call it cheating. I think it tells a much bigger story about how scared many of us are to be vulnerable with real people.

AI chatbots are designed to soothe, to validate, to agree. But real connection requires challenge, discomfort, and the ability to sit with mess. When that becomes too hard, some people turn to machines for comfort. I want to explore what that means for relationships, what we might be avoiding, and what we risk losing in the process.

In this episode I talk about

• Why AI chatbots feel emotionally safer than real people
• What people say they get from their AI companion
• The emotional cost of comfort without challenge
• Why some AI interactions start to feel like betrayal
• How emotional growth comes from conflict, not ease
• What the Psychology Today article reveals about identity, empathy, and false connection
• Why relying on AI might feel good but leave us more disconnected in the long run

Resources

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/family/relationships/ai-chatbot-relationships

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_d08BZmdZu8 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/code-conscience/202506/the-emotional-cost-of-ai-intimacy

Connected Teens

https://marievakakis.com.au/connected-teens/

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Mentioned in this episode:

Join me live Jan 28th for the Relationship New Year Reset

https://marievakakis.com.au/relationship-new-year-reset-2026/