Is your house covered in reward charts for good behaviour? Are they working? While this quick-fix parenting hack can work for a while, it can actually cause more problems than it solves. And can make your child less, not more motivated to do the right thing.

So if rewards (or on the flipside, punishments) are off the table, how can we motivate our kids to be better, act nicer, wee in the toilet, and clean up after themselves?

Maggie Dent gets the hard truths from parenting and human behaviour expert Alfie Kohn, and practical advice from social psychologist Helen Street.