Have you ever had a reaction to your partner that felt huge?

Like a ten out of ten response to something small?

You are crying over coffee.

They are confused.

You are both thinking, what just happened?

It makes sense that this feels confusing. Most couples are not fighting about the present moment. They are reacting from something older.

In this episode, I explore how your wounded child shows up in adult relationships, why conflict can feel bigger than the situation and how attachment patterns keep couples stuck in the same loop.

This is not about blame. It is about understanding the pattern.

• Why small arguments turn into big emotional reactions

• How childhood needs for safety, soothing and validation shape adult conflict

• What anxious and avoidant attachment can look like in a fight

• Why you get louder and they shut down

• What secure conflict actually feels like

• Practical steps to pause, name your needs and respond rather than react

You are not broken for reacting strongly. There is nothing wrong with you for feeling that. Often, if it feels hysterical, it is historical.

The goal is not to erase your wounds. The goal is to make sure they are not driving your adult intimacy.

Resources:

If you want more support, download the Conflict Guide and start noticing your patterns with compassion and clarity.

https://marievakakis.com.au/why-couples-keep-arguing-and-what-its-really-aboutand-what-its-really-about/

ENROL NOW Relationship New Year RESET 2026

https://marievakakis.com.au/relationship-new-year-reset-2026/

Connect with Marie

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