Actor. Comedian. Writer. Icon. Benito Skinner is on the pod and he's here to show the aliens (or any other beings who might find the record, he does not discriminate!!!) more than just pop culture—he wants them to feel the passage of time.

Groundbreaking albums go from panned to adored. Musicians put on amazing performances and are shunned. TV-shows run 100 episodes without heeding any stop signs. Meh clothing becomes a uniform. And The Lion King goes from being an animated film, to a live Broadway musical, to The Lion King with 3D-rendered, lifelike animals voiced by an all-star cast, just because we can.

Benito's Artifacts

Follow Benito on Twitter and Instagram and listen to him and Mary Beth Barone on their podcast Obsessed.

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Caleb and Shelby welcome stand-up comedian Marcella Arguello into the Headgum family the only way they know how—by getting into a Dick Feud with her. TBQH it's mostly Shelby's feud, with Caleb instigating and causing chaos from the sidelines (as he does). And all this happens around building Marcella's Golden Record, which has iconic TV, iconic music, iconic GIFs, iconic nails, and iconic toddlers.

Marcella's Artifacts

Follow Marcella on Twitter and Instagram, watch her comedy live, and listen to her and Niccole Thurman's new Headgum podcast The Scroll Down.

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I...don't know what to say about this one. Actor, writer, and fellow Headgum podcaster Geoffrey James is on the show and just...wow. What even happened here? Mayhem, tattoos, heavily reused bits from last episode, our hosts and guest are absolutely depraved this episode.

Geoff's Artifacts

Follow Geoff on Instagram and Twitter, and listen to him on The Headgum Podcast and Review Revue!

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Shelby is ill and will NOT stop giving sex eyes. Caleb is in Portland and surviving the heatwave. It’s up to comedian, writer, and actress Mitra Jouhari (Three Busy Debras, Big Mouth, High Maintenance) to educate the aliens, and she’s created a Golden Record designed to showcase the pinnacle of entertainment on Earth.

Mitra’s Artifacts

Follow Mitra on Instagram and watch Three Busy Debras on HBO Max!

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Caleb has fled to Portland. Shelby is sleeping in and doesn't miss Caleb...yet. Comedian and writer Raina Morris visits with them to prep her Golden Record and it's just...so much stuff! There's software to instruct the aliens on how to take care of humans; details on how to properly care for our skin and hair; how to satisfy oral fixations and stay hydrated at the same time. Raina swears up and down that she's not prepping the aliens for zoo-keeping an exhibit of humans, but truly you will have to decide on what her plans ultimately are.

Raina's Artifacts

Follow Raina on Instagram and Twitter!

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Shelby talks about her shaving injury. Caleb is displeased, but also preoccupied with speculative workplace drama. Comedian Liza Treyger almost leaves the podcast early due to the graphic description of Shelby's injury, but sticks it out to ensure her Golden Record is delivered to the aliens.

Liza's Artifacts

Follow Liza on Twitter and Instagram, and listen to That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast wherever you listen to podcasts.

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Caleb has fallen and hit his head. Like a true king he got back up, but now Shelby has the difficult task of convincing him that he doesn't have a brain bleed. Luckily, she has comedian, writer, and actress Nori Reed to assist in assuring Caleb that he doesn't need to seek immediate medical attention. And while Nori's here, why not find out what she'd put on her Golden Record? Absurd reality television, home decor superstores, Italian vistas and Diane Lane, and Normani's magic basketball bum bounce are all heading to space.

Nori's Artifacts

Original Voyager Artifact

• Rajasthani greeting, "Hello to everyone. We are happy here and you be happy there."

Listen to Hot White Heist on Audible, watch Nori's comedy on HBO Max, and follow her on Instagram and Twitter!

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Last week's episode...it really devastated Shelby and Caleb. So much so that they're taking some precautionary steps for the sanctity of the pod. Comedian, friend, and breakfast enthusiast A.J. Marroquin mediates our hosts' ongoing negotiations, occasionally sharing his own Golden Record when allowed to. Jennifer Lopez makes yet another guest appearance on the pod, and so do a hell of a lot of snakes. Theme park souvenir photos, cars spiraling down from the heavens, The Golden Corral, all of it is a wondrous backstop for hammering out Caleb and Shelby's dysfunctional functionality. And it is beautiful.

A.J.‘s Artifacts

Follow A.J. and do literally everything in your power to see him do comedy live.

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Actor, producer, and writer E.R. Fightmaster takes great issue with the premise of Keeping Records. And the issue is that the show shouldn't be about educating the aliens on humanity—it's about making the aliens feel how we feel. And that means the aliens need to feel perplexed by CrossFit, electrified by Temptation Island, inspired by the WNBA, and...I actually am not sure what they'll think about the oyster thing. But they're gonna feel something.

E.R.'s Artifacts

Follow E.R. and watch them on Shrill! Also listen to their music released as Twin!

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Comedian and writer Chris Gethard has a vision for how he wants the world to be, and that vision is one where you never know what's going to happen next. For that reason, his record is a collection of truly bizarre audio-visual television moments that he's encountered over the course of his life. Wrestling, bizarre Spanish-language gameshows, and a whole lot of Mr. T, like probably to the point where the aliens will believe he is a deity—which he, of course, is.

Chris's Artifacts

Legacy viral videos mentioned in episode

Follow Chris, and watch his new special Half My Life on June 1st, on Amazon Prime Video, Apple TV, Pluto TV, Peacock, Tubi, and more! But preferably Tubi, because, well, you know. Tubi.

Follow the show @keepingrecordspod

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