Ladies, We Need To Talk

Approaching her 70th birthday, Gail Rice booked herself an appointment with a sex worker. She'd never done anything like it in her life. As a younger woman, Gail had enjoyed a string of sexual and romantic partners. As the years passed, her sexual currency dwindled and she was hungry for intimacy. But exchanging money for sex taught Gail much more about herself than she was expecting. This is a story about erotic power, ageing and finding the courage to ask for what you want. 

What to listen to next: 

You can binge more episodes of Ladies, We Need to Talk on the ABC listen app (in Australia) or wherever you get your podcasts.  

What to read next:   

This episode contains references to sex work, ageing, women, sexuality, escort, paying for sex, erotic power, getting older, orgasm.

Correction: this episode describes Gail Rice approaching Mitch's escort agency for a refund. However, Gail contacted Mitch directly and got him to agree to a refund. 

Ozempic has entered the group chat. Since GLP-1 agonist drugs burst onto the scene, they've been hailed as a weight-loss game changer, but they've also raised uncomfortable questions about what bodies are acceptable, or not.

For years, the body inclusivity movement pushed back against the idea that only thin bodies can be 'healthy' but Ozempic & co are drowning out this message.

So, what do these drugs mean for fat liberation? And how can we shift our collective thinking around weight and morality?

Yumi Stynes chats to a panel of amazing women about the impact of this new generation of weight-loss drugs and how we can all find ways to be kinder to our bodies.

Featured in this conversation:

• Dr Emma Beckett, nutritionist
• Evie Gardiner, size inclusivity advocate
• Nat Atkinson, mum taking Wegovy

What to listen to next:

You can binge more episodes of Ladies, We Need to Talk on the ABC listen app (in Australia) or wherever you get your podcasts.

What to read next:

This episode will address questions like, what does it feel like to be a fat woman today? Is there increasing pressure to go on weight loss drug Ozempic? How has the rise in Ozempic impacted fat women? What is it like to loose a lot of weight? How does society treat you differently after weight loss? 

Having blah sex? You've CUM to the right place.

Dr Emily Nagoski has the tools for you.

The renowned sex educator and author of Come as You Are, Burnout and Come Together brings the wisdom of psychology and sex research to the fore. She chats with Yumi Stynes about the science behind our sex drives and how we can bring back the chutzpah in the bedroom. (R)

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This episode contains references to sex, long-term relationships, marriage, libido, sex drive, heterosexual relationships, queer, gender, mental load. 

Unrelenting standards, high expectations and a fierce, reprimanding inner critic. Perfectionism is often celebrated, but striving for flawlessness comes at a cost. There’s lots of ways we, as women feel pressure to be perfect: be the perfect partner, the perfect mother, have the perfect body. But, of course, perfectionism is always out of reach. So, how can we learn to be kinder to ourselves and let go, even just a little?  

Yumi Stynes meets women whose perfectionism has consumed their lives. She learns what happens when a perfectionist f*cks up, and how to recover. Plus, clinical psychologist Eileen Seah shares tips on how we can all accept our imperfect selves.  

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Anxious? We got you

Penny Moodie’s OCD

This episode contains references to perfectionism, procrastination, anxiety, depression, relationships, parenting, striving, IVF, fertility, career, eating disorders, self-criticism, psychology, therapy. 

Hannah Diviney never saw herself reflected in pop culture. And she definitely didn't see herself as the object of desire. Growing up with cerebral palsy, Hannah watched on as rom-coms and teen dramas depicted able-bodied bombshells fall in love, snog their guts out and have sex. All these experiences, it seemed, were out of reach for her. It meant that Hannah had the demanding job of being her own role model. She had to be the change she wanted to see.

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Your sex and disability stories

This episode contains references to: dating, relationships, disability, sex, sex scenes, television, entertainment industry, fear, anxiety, body image, Beyonce, Lizzo, Latecomers. 

Have you ever experienced 'the ick'? It's that sudden, visceral feeling of being put off by someone you're dating. Maybe it's their flat cap, the way they chew, or how they laugh.

Stories of the ick are prolific online, but it leaves us with a question — what causes it?

To separate red flags from disgust, we get into the psychology of the ick — why you might feel icky, if it should be a deal breaker, and what it says about your own attachment style.

This episode comes from our science friends at All in the Mind.

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This episode contains references to: dating, relationships, evolutionary psychology, disgust, break up, situationship, love, conflict, couples.

'Bounce back' culture can find someone else to pick on, we're celebrating bodies who've given birth.

And this episode isn't just for the mums. It's for everyone who's ever felt the bod they were given this earth to roam in isn't good enough.

Yumi Stynes meets women who've fought the insidious pressures on mums' bodies and found a new appreciation for themselves.

Featuring: burns survivor and author Turia Pitt, founder of the Australian Birth Stories podcast Sophie Walker, body image researcher Dr Zali Yager and mum of two Tegan Russell.

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Body Image

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Love your boobs

This episode contains references to: body image, eating disorders, birth, baby, motherhood, parenting, stretch marks, weight gain, weight loss, bounce back, diet, diet culture, children, self love, prolapse, child birth, Australian Birth Stories podcast.

Emotional labour is the overlooked cousin of the mental load. It's managing the feelings of people around us, from being a shoulder to cry on to cheering on your colleagues. Taking the time to check in on relatives and making sure the fridge is stocked with everyone's favourite foods. Emotional labour is invisible yet vital work that falls more heavily on women.

Journalist Rose Hackman reckons it's time women are recognised, and even compensated for this emotional output. Rose chats to Yumi Stynes about how this form of labour underpins our homes, relationships and workplaces, and how we can be more selective about where we put our efforts.

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This episode contains references to: gender roles, parenting, motherhood, orgasm gap, sex, mental load, caring, fatigue, burnout.

Welcome to the world of swingers, where the libidos are high but so are the stakes. Join Yumi Stynes as she heads to a swinger's club and learns what it takes to open up a relationship without breaking trust. Meet the women in the swinging scene and find out what they get out of it (besides the orgasms).

This episode will change the way you think about swinging, and maybe even re-frame your approach to intimacy. (R)

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This episode contains references to: sex, swinging, intimacy, couples, marriage, open relationships, LGBT, threesome, unicorns communication.

When Jamila Rizvi was dealing with the emotional sucker punch of a brain tumour diagnosis, she needed a friend who understood what she was going through. Enter, writer and comedian Rosie Waterland. Rosie knows what it's like to live with a broken brain. A childhood marked by abuse and trauma has left her struggling with complex PTSD throughout her adulthood.

Rosie and Jamila have very different illnesses but lots in common. They chat with Yumi Stynes about how the world views physical and mental illness differently, the lasagne sympathy scale and keeping on keeping on when there's no cure in sight.

Please note, this episode contains discussion of suicide.

Listen back:

Helpful links:

Lifeline 13 11 14

This episode contains references to: chronic illness, brain tumour, depression, PTSD, trauma, relationships, grief, loss, carer, caring, mental health and suicide.