Leadership Chemistry

Part 2 of my conversation with Dr. Jade Teta continues our discussion of connection, and how it relates to our contentment. As we age, we tend to feel more and more content with our lives, and if you want to live life a little better, it's important to focus on these moments. Sure, we may regret a few things here and there, but instead of ruminating on what you did or didn't do, focus on practicing gratitude instead and you'll find you feel a higher sense of well-being.

Related Links

Next Level Tribe by Dr. Jade Teta and Danny Coleman

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Website: www.jadeteta.com

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This episode is part 1 of a conversation with the formidable Dr. Jade Teta. Jade and I co-authored the book Next Level Tribe, which to this day is one of my greatest professional achievements. In the book and in these episodes, Jade and I talk about the many ways to create deep connections: being approachable, asking questions, being kind, smiling at someone. Making and maintaining meaningful connections is why we're here as humans, and if you want to unlock greater life satisfaction, start here.

Related Links

Next Level Tribe by Dr. Jade Teta and Danny Coleman

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Website: www.jadeteta.com

Instagram: @jadeteta

I never liked the idea that you should live without regrets. Regret is not only a normal experience, but it's extremely useful for providing us with opportunities for growth. Today I'm sharing with you the 4 types of regret we might face in our lives, as well as one really useful tool we can use to help our clients harness their regrets and use them as a tool for success.

Read The Power of Regret by Daniel H. Pink

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As coaches, it's our jobs to plant seeds in the minds of our clients. We sprinkle in new and different ideas of action, without knowing what will take root and create lasting change. We can't force anyone to change their mind, but we do have the opportunity to give those planted seeds the best chance at growing with a few techniques.

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Let's get real here for a minute. You probably aren't going to get your clients the change they want. The odds are stacked against you when it comes to seeing transformational change! Your clients may want a full-body makeover, but it just isn't likely, so it's your job to reset expectations and show them the benefits beyond the scale. If they keep showing up, that full body transformation is possible… it just may take a little longer than they hoped for.

Resources for this Episode:

Clancy Black, Lenny R. Vartanian & Kate Faasse (2021) Investigating lay beliefs regarding the effect of weight loss on health, Psychology & Health, 36:8, 934-951, DOI: 10.1080/08870446.2020.1792904Fowler, J. H., & Nicholas, C. A. (2008).

Dynamic spread of happiness in a large social network: Longitudinal analysis over 20 years in the Framingham Heart Study. BMJ 337: a2338.

Fat loss and muscle gain: What does realistic progress look like? https://www.precisionnutrition.com/rates-of-fat-loss-and-muscle-gain

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Sometimes good enough is just that: good enough. One of the biggest barriers to entry for beginners is feeling like everything has to be perfect. Beginners want to stay in the fantasy before they start, they get all the benefits of working hard without any of the pain and failure involved with getting there. We all know perfection isn't achievable, so let's let "good enough" be enough.

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Here's my hot take: you're not "bad with names," you're just lazy. When you say you're bad with names, what you're really saying is you just don't care about the other person. If you want people to trust you, if you want to get your clients results, you have to show you care. No more taking the easy way out. It's about time you gave a shit.

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The human brain is more complex than we know. Every action we take is informed by our past. You can't coach someone (or even force or shame them) into doing an exercise or maintaining their diet without taking into consideration their traumas or the psychological distress that causes them to act the ways they do. If you want to impart lasting change, it's imperative to listen and be on the look out for ways to understand your clients, and work with them through not only their physical, but mental transformation. Keep things simple, help them find joy, and connection to something meaningful and you'll have a client who achieves the change they came to you for.

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There's this cultural myth that you can and should do it "all," whatever that means. You have the same amount of hours in the day as Beyoncé, right? Well, it's a little more nuanced than that. Truthfully, we have a finite amount of time and energy in our lives, everything we do and every decision we make takes up some of that energy. So when your clients get to the end of the day and have no mental energy left to make the best choices for their health and fitness journeys, can we blame them? Let's dismantle this idea that with the "right" time management, we can do everything and instead focus on helping our clients (and ourselves!) make the choices that are truly meaningful to us.

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Change is, well… hard. Hard enough that research shows that even the fear of imminent death is not enough to make people change their behaviors. In fact, the odds that a person would change when their own life or death was on the line are nine to one. So why is change so damn hard?

That's Danny's life's work. Understanding human behavior—including why we're so resistant to change—so coaches like you can help our clients in real, lasting ways. Tune in to hear the 6 Dials of Change that you need to understand to make real improvement in your and your clients' lives.

Read the Change or Die article

Read about Ramit Sethi's Money Dials

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