Life Is Love School

By Yumay ChangEducation Self-Improvement

Life Is Love School episodes

July 06, 2021 Why People Don't Recognize They Were Abused in Childhood (Part II)
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool

It takes the average childhood abuse victim 24 years to reveal their trauma history, even though disclosure is often the key to recovery. Some survivors choose to keep silent to avoid potential stigma, but others are not consciously aware that they suffered abuse. In this episode, I cover reasons 6-10 of why survivors might not recognize that they were abused as children.
If you missed the first 5, you can find it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Szog5SRzWf8
You cannot change what you do not acknowledge. — Dr. Phil
Not recognizing abuse is actually very common, but if we want to live a better life, the first step has to be understanding how our past shaped us today, including how it affects the way we think, feel, and behave. We have to face the past to heal it.
If you enjoy videos like this, please LIKE and SUBSCRIBE to get notified of upcoming videos, and leave a comment if you come up with reasons I might have missed. I always enjoy hearing from you, and thank you for watching!
7 min
July 05, 2021 7 Signs You're in a Healthy Relationship
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
People often spend a lot of time talking about red flags and how to spot a toxic relationship, but there is a lot less discussion about what constitutes a healthy relationship. In this episode, I share 7 signs that signal you are in a healthy relationship. Knowing what a healthy relationship looks like is especially for adult survivors of childhood trauma — to have healthy intimacy, you need to know what to look for and not just what to avoid.
10 min
July 02, 2021 Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Attachment Styles
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you ever wonder if there's a link between Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and attachment styles?
When people think about NPD, they think of someone like a Don Draper — A person with an inflated sense of self that comes off as arrogant, entitled, and envious. However, there's another type of NPD where the individual presents themselves as insecure, focusing on themselves but seeking reassurance from others.
In this episode, I cover the differences between the two types of narcissists and their typical attachment styles.
This episode is in response to a question I got from a viewer. I often get ideas from viewers on what topics to cover. Please feel free to comment below with suggestions; I always love hearing from you!
10 min
June 29, 2021How to Heal the Anxious Preoccupied Attachment Style
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you feel insecure in relationships?

Have you acted out because of your overwhelming insecurity?

Are you worried that your protest behavior (acting clinging, jealous, upset) is pushing your partner away?
If you answer YES to these questions, you may have a predominantly Anxious Attachment style.
Our attachment styles are formed in childhood, and a person with the Anxious Attachment style likely had unpredictable, emotionally immature, or unstable parents that only provided inconsistent care. This lack of stability leaves the child not knowing what to expect, and to gain a sense of control, the child becomes highly attuned to the parent’s mood, and many develop into people-pleaser adults with an Anxious Attachment style.
For those of us that are Anxiously Attached, we both crave relationships but we also suffer a lot in them. Relationships, especially an intimate relationship with a romantic partner, bring out our childhood wounds and limiting beliefs of not being worthy of love. We watch our partner’s words and actions closely for any signs that they may be pulling away, and we act out and do things we may later regret that drive people away. It’s a vicious cycle, but there is a way to break it.
In this episode, I detail how the attachment wound formed and walk you through a 6-step Dialectical Behavior Therapy process to help you bring your thoughts and emotions back into balance. I then talk about managing a relationship, starting from the dating phase, so you have the best chance possible to heal your attachment style and have the healthy, mutually supportive relationship you deserve.
This discussion topic came up in our women-only membership program.
20 min
June 10, 2021 6 Simple Ways to Stop Self-Sabotaging Behaviors
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you know what kills the most dreams? It’s not lack of education, money, preparation, but our internal resistance.

The more we want something, the stronger the resistance inside of us fights back.

Sometimes it just feels better (and easier) to self-sabotage and control our failure than face the possibility of giving it all yet still failing.

We are afraid to be left with the possibility that our best is just not good enough.

We might also suffer from low self-worth. We’re so used to being overlooked, mistreated, exploited that we feel undeserving of success or happiness. The cognitive dissonance is so strong that we self-sabotage as soon as things are starting to go well.

These are only some of the reasons why we self-sabotage, and in this episode, I list more.
The net is, change is hard for everyone, and the resistance is real.

Despite how hard change is, it is necessary if we want better, whether that’s more financial freedom, a more fulfilling career, or a healthier body.

Change requires us to overcome resistance. We can’t allow our chattering brain to start producing excuses and a million reasons why we can’t/shouldn’t/won’t do what we know we need to do.

Life is too precious to settle for less.

We can’t afford to get stuck.

In this episode, I give you 6 essential, simple, and effective tips to overcome our internal resistance, so you can get things done and live the life you want.

You deserve nothing less.
21 min
May 31, 2021 How to Crush Stress at Work with Lolita Guarin
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
Do you work for an unreasonable boss?
Do you wish that you are better at saying no so you’re not always overwhelmed?
Do you want to feel more peace but struggle with the how?
If so, this episode is for you. Stress Management coach Lolita Guarin (http://www.beamazingyou.com/) is one of my favorite people, and after you listen to this episode, you will know why.
As the only child raised by alcoholic, controlling parents, Lolita had difficulty saying no, even when she’s stretched to the brink at work. Eventually, she was working so hard that one day she suddenly collapsed. This rock bottom moment led to her awakening, and the rest is history.
Lolita is hands down one of the most inspiring people I know, and we clicked the first time we met. She is a walking ball of positive energy, joy, and love; it’s impossible not to feel uplifted after talking to her. Lolita is also ab active member of Life Is Love School’s women-only coaching group, where she generously shares her insights and tips with fellow ladies.
“Rest and self-care are so important. When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.”
-Eleanor Brown
If you are interested in learning skills like this that help you have better relationships, I invite you to LIKE and SUBSCRIBE, so you get notified of new episodes when they come up!
35 min
May 26, 2021 How To Redesign Your Life in Midlife
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool

Midlife is when many people start to wonder if they are on the right path. This question could feel unsettling, even scary. After all, by midlife, most of us have invested a few decades in our chosen line of work, and starting afresh seems daunting.
Statistically speaking, over 43% of women will live beyond their 90s, and close to 10% will live to 100, so doing a pivot at midlife is not too late! You should do work that brings you joy until you take your last breath. There's no reason you can't do what you're passionate about just because you've hit a certain age. And this idea that you have to be stuck in the same job forever with no hope of making a change—well, that's just false.
"It is never too late to be what you might have been." — George Eliot
This topic of making a midlife career transition came up in our women-only coaching group, and I was excited to see this question come up. If you are pondering this question, it means that you are likely further along in your healing journey. You want more out of life than barely surviving; you want to thrive in all areas of your life, and this means doing work that leverages your strength, fulfills you, and aligns with your values.

If you are interested in learning skills like this that help you have better relationships, I invite you to LIKE and SUBSCRIBE, so you get notified of new episodes when they come up.
15 min
May 15, 2021 How to Talk To Your Partner When The Stakes Are High
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool
The sign of a healthy relationship isn't that two people never fight. In fact, it's often a sign of problems. Either the couple suppresses their emotions, which leads to mounting resentment, or one or both partners are indifferent toward their relationship and don't care enough to even fight. The key to a long, happy relationship isn't that there's no conflict but whether disputes can be resolved constructively.
In this episode, I cover the simple skills that will immediately uplevel your ability to work through issues successfully with your partners.
If you are interested in learning skills like this that help you have better relationships, I invite you to LIKE and SUBSCRIBE, so you get notified of new episodes when they come up!
17 min
May 06, 2021 30 Signs You Suffered Childhood Trauma Part II
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool

As a follow-up to the previous episode, which covers signs 1 through 15, in this episode, I cover 16 through 30 of the common signs that you suffered childhood trauma. If you think you are uniquely broken from the abuse, I want you to know that you are not. Your brain and body did the best they can to cope with impossible situations, and as an adult, you can learn how to heal yourself and how to have successful relationships.
For the first 15 signs, check out “30 Signs You Suffered Childhood Trauma Part I.“
19 min
May 06, 2021 30 Signs You're Dealing With Childhood Trauma Part I
Connect with fellow survivors and access free resources:
https://linktr.ee/lifeisloveschool

In the USA, nearly 700,000 children are abused in U.S each year. Unfortunately, trauma leaves a legacy; research by the CDC shows that trauma survivors are more likely to die by suicide, suffer chronic mental and physical illness, have a shortened life span, and fall prey to abuse in their adult relationships.
The reason? Trauma, especially in early childhood, where the brain is still fragile and in development, causes structural changes in the brain that impact how one senses and processes emotions.
Additionally, survivors often lack skills on how to regulate emotions, communicate effectively, set healthy boundaries, and build healthy relationships, and as a result, many survivors are revictimized in their adult relationships.
“An abnormal reaction to an abnormal situation is normal behavior.” — Viktor Frankl
In this episode, I cover 15 of the 30 common signs that you suffered childhood trauma. If you think you are uniquely broken from the abuse, I want you to know that you are not. Your brain and body did the best they can to cope with impossible situations, and as an adult, you can learn how to heal yourself and how to have successful relationships.
For the following 15 signs, check out "30 Signs You Suffered Childhood Trauma Part II."
23 min

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