0:00-30:00: We’re…a third of the way through the season? None of the Mariners have contracted the ‘roni, but strangeness still dominates this whole year. How do we fell about the way MLB, and specifically its players, have handled all this? Please refrain from getting horny at the team hotel. A good chunk of our happiness comes from being extremely correct. We’ve also reached a Zen state from watching inconsequential bullpen guys. This is part of the Tao of Mariners.

30:10-43:35: What is really the goal of this season? How does having a perennially on fire bullpen actually help the Mariners? Then we get lost talking about J.P. Crawford for an extended period of time.

43:40-57:15: We now move to the negative parts of this season, which go by the name White, Evan. He is, sadly, approaching a dangerous zone. Can someone check to see if Mallex Smith’s bat has a barrel? Sending either of them to the alternate site will do more harm than good though. Let people struggle without bullying them online or trying to diagnose things from your couch.

57:20-1:20:20: Ending, as always, with listener questions. This week’s batch is about Vogey and Mallex, the lack of minor leagues, and what the hell is happening in Tacoma? Find out which player Kate is secretly worried about.

Music: “Moby Octopad” by Yo La Tengo // “Heatstroke” by Calvin Harris ft. Young Thug, Ariana Grande, Pharrell Williams

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