Making Polyamory Work

Libby discusses the distinction between offers and requests in relating and how important it can be to make sure you're saying what you actually mean.

Kai Cheng Thom's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kaichengthom/?hl=en Spectrum of Consent: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1kvYW4eSVKRuwUt5Mc-DnCyNVzvA036f8/view?usp=sharing

Marcia Baczynski on Desire Smuggling: https://askingforwhatyouwant.com/desire-smuggler/

27 Alternatives to "Is this Okay?": https://askingforwhatyouwant.com/27-alternatives-to-asking-is-this-okay/

Libby talks with AASECT-certified sexuality educator Aubri Lancaster about asexuality and aromanticism.

Aubri's website: https://acesexeducation.com/

Aubri's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/acesexeducation/

Libby shares her thoughts about debate about whether hierarchy is bad or wrong in polyamory.

Additional reading: Lola Phoenix - the Hierarchy Polyamorous People Don't Talk Enough About: https://www.nonmonogamyhelp.com/the-hierarchy-polyamorous-people-dont-talk-enough-about/

Ready for Polyamory - Is there a Problem with Hierarchy https://www.readyforpolyamory.com/post/guest-post-is-there-a-problem-with-hierarchy

Poly.Land - Sneakiarchy: https://poly.land/2018/11/01/sneakiarchy-secret-hierarchy-dishonest-egalitarianism/

Joreth Retracts Descriptive vs Prescriptive Hierarchy: https://joreth.dreamwidth.org/408917.html

Podcast episodes referenced in the episode: Veto Happens: https://www.makingpolyamorywork.com/episodes/veto-happens

Where is this Going?: https://www.makingpolyamorywork.com/episodes/where-is-this-going

Most folks practicing nonmonogamy accept that no one person can meet all their needs. And yet, sometimes it can be challenging when a new partner starts meeting needs that haven't been met by an established relationship. In this episode Libby explores the trickiness when new relationships fulfill desires that established ones don't some ideas to help you navigate this situation well.

There’s Nothing to Fear: https://www.makingpolyamorywork.com/episodes/theres-nothing-to-fear
9 Relationships of a Modern Marriage: https://www.makingpolyamorywork.com/episodes/9-relationships-of-a-modern-marriage
Where is this going? https://www.makingpolyamorywork.com/episodes/where-is-this-going
This may be a bitter pill https://www.makingpolyamorywork.com/episodes/this-may-be-a-bitter-pill

This week Libby shares a re-release from December 2019 about the science of compassion, and why it's key to loving relationships, including the one with yourself.

The Gottman Institute on Contempt: https://www.gottman.com/blog/this-one-thing-is-the-biggest-predictor-of-divorce/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/dont-delay/200903/self-forgiveness-reduces-procrastination

https://self-compassion.org/

Part two of Libby's conversation with Dr. Joli Hamilton where they discuss how navigating differences can open a relationship and the people in it into transformation.

Joli's website: https://www.jolihamilton.com/

The Year of Opening: https://www.jolihamilton.com/TYO

What happens when exploring different relationship styles reveals uncomfortable differences between you and a partner? In this episode, Libby talks with Dr. Joli Hamilton about polyamory as a sacred process of individuation and grief.

Joli's website: https://www.jolihamilton.com/

The Year of Opening: https://www.jolihamilton.com/TYO

Long-requested, Libby discusses solo polyamory with Crystal Byrd Farmer, author, organizer, diversity consultant.. and solo polyamorist.

SHOW LINKS:

Crystal's website: https://crystalbyrdfarmer.com/

Crystal's book: https://newsociety.com/books/t/the-token

Solo polyamory: https://solopoly.net/2014/12/05/what-is-solo-polyamory-my-take/

In this part 2, Libby and Alyssa talk through some of the challenges that can show up in nonmonogamy for people who are neurodiverse