Ready To Be Real by Síle Seoige

Nicola Hanney : Surviving Coercive Control


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Topics covered : Cancer, red flags, coercive control, faith, resilience.


This week I speak to the incredible Nicola Hanney.

Nicola lives in Dublin with her son and she’s been through hell and back. Her book, ‘Stronger -what didn’t kill me, made me’ is out now and in this conversation, we cover elements of her story.

She comes from a large family and works as a hairdresser, and 8 years ago, when she was 36 she was first diagnosed with cancer. She then went on to meet a man called Paul Moody, a former member of An Garda Síochána who terrorised her until he was convicted in 2022.

Over a 14 hour period in July 2018, she received 652 messages from him. That’s one roughly every 90 seconds. The mental, emotional and physical abuse he subjected Nicola to, led him to be one of the first people in Ireland to be convicted of coercive control. 

And she gave up her anonymity to share her harrowing story in the hope of empowering others who find themselves in similar situations, and to highlight the early signs of abuse.


If you have been affected by this episode, please go to Ireland helplines and hotlines (findahelpline.com) for a list of resources that might be beneficial.

Women's Aid - Listening. Believing. Supporting. Empowering. (womensaid.ie)

Home - Men's Aid (mensaid.ie)


‘Taking back control’ documentary available to watch on the RTÉ Player.

Taking Back Control - RTÉ Player (rte.ie)


If you’re a fan of what I do, please follow, rate and review in all the usual places.

Thanks, as always, for your support of Ready to be Real.

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