It's official: Alexander Isak has been labelled "a rat". But surely there needs to be a new animal for the Newcastle United fanbase? Pete, Luke and Jim Bernie Campbell are on the case...

The lads discuss Spurs winning the first North London derby outside the UK (with thanks to Frontier Pets) and Man United's new hire, who fittingly seems to be an FBI agent from a screwball comedy. Meanwhile, Wayne Rooney begins hatching a plan to bring down High Performance's Tom Brady. Mr. Brady, you ever heard of Walkabout?

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