Radio Toilet ov Hell

We did the horrible thing we said we would do. Verotika, Glenn Danzig's directorial debut, is available now on video on demand. You can rent or purchase it via many channels but I highly recommend that you do not do that. We delve into the details on this week's episode but here's a quick preview: Verotika is an "erotic horror anthology" that is neither erotic, nor horrifying, and barely qualifies as a movie due to incredible incompetence. It's one of the worst movies I've ever seen. That doesn't mean it's so bad it's somehow good. There is no fun to be had in this joyless fucking film. It's so bad that it put me in a shit mood for about a day. Anyway, Danzig is a hack who has never fucked. Enjoy this week's episode.

Music featured on this show:

MAUL – Cessation Embraced

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.

Uhhhh we didn't really want to talk about COVID-19 but this shit is really gumming up all the works. This week we're joined by Tucker from Throne of Iron (and Thorr-Axe and Crowtein) to hear his tale of trying to play Up the Hammers festival in Greece as the borders get shuttered. It's fucked! We're also talking about getting swole at home and some solid advice for bands feeling the crunch of show cancellations. Got questions for Tucker about promoting your band? You can email him at [email protected]. Interview starts at 41:50. Aside from that, me and Jordo are talking about the various other insane happenings of the world. God help us all. And send a kind word to Matt from Slugdge who is stuck in quarantine at the moment.

Music featured on this show:

Throne of Iron – Dark Shrine of Rituals

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.

Wouldn't you believe it? I'm in a worse mood than last Wednesday morning! Here are the topics on this week's show: Breno started up his own podcast to flex on me and Jordo. It's all about in-depth interviews with artists that don't get much love. Hear him talk about Undergrounded like the JUDAS that he is. / There's a hip new disease cancelling tours and festivals everywhere. South by Southwest is cancelled! Insurance companies aren't granting coverage to touring bands! Service industry workers are getting seriously fucked! All of Italy, including poor Lacuna Coil, is under quarantine! Some dumbass bogan might have infected everyone at a Tool concert! We're talking, of course, about coronavirus. Wash your FUCKING hands. / Politician + metal mashup shirts: Not great! / We've got piping hot old man BEEF between Bruce Dickinson and Rob Halford. Why? We have no idea! / Sabaton makes me want to bully Sabaton / A short chat about Ghost featuring casual racism against the Irish. It's a good one, folks.

Music featured on this show:

Crystal Coffin– “Ride Through the Night”

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.

If you're joining us for the podcast this morning just know that I'm facedown on a pile of kratom and I may not ever get up again. ANYWAY, things we're talking about on this show: Breno got axed from his piece of shit job so we're commiserating with him and also listening to him eat weird Japanese candies. Brian "Head" Welch of KoRn has invested with Doctor Nick Riviera in a new venture that gives wealthy bands places to stop on the road to get a sunshine enema at nootropic drydrunk clinics. There's a new Five Finger Death Punch album coming. In retrospect, listening to this segment will explain everything you ever need to know about America. There's pit beef between a hardcore band, The Banner, and Face Without Fear, a nu metal revival act featuring a sex criminal. Ministry successfully weathered the storm of having a band member credibly accused of targeting underage women by... ignoring it entirely! Finally, Moonsorrow is but-the-riffs-ing taking a Nazi band on the road. Fuck, I'm too tired to be angry anymore.

Music featured on this show:

Dead Heat– “Estamos Aqui”

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.

We got a lotta show for you this week. TOPICS:

R.I.P. Mad Mike Hughes, a flat earth legend / Sully from Godsmack is an economist now / We all own fictional bars. Now we get to ban 3 songs from the jukebox / You like Judas Priest? Great news! There's another Judas Priest*! / A killer segue / Former Anthrax vocalist Dan Nelson beat the hell out of two old men and we need Scared Straight for hair metal dudes / A spirited discussion on paying bands in EXPOSURE BUCKS, multi-level-marketing schemes, and confidence tricks. It's a good 'un.

Music featured on this show:

A Pregnant Light – “LOOKIN4LOVE”

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.

We do a lotta things on this show:

HELLYEAH makes a return and we've got questions about the whole dang thing! / Who is Malcolm Gladwell? A 2 minute explainer / Peewee Herman DID NOTHING WRONG! / Nü metal icon Aaron Lewis explains politics and EDM / We try to figure out what an impeachment is / There's always a market for OLD SCHOOL in your music / We liked Earache better when Digby still answered the phones / Fondly remembering our worst artist interview / We would all probably be happier if we just listened to bro country music / Dave Mustaine once said some shitty things about murder victims but it's OK cuz he was just drunk. SO QUIT HARPING ON IT, JEEZ  / Getting caned in Singapore for sharpie-ing MEGADETH RULZ on a bathroom wall / Jordan finally saw one of Joe's favorite movies, Sorry to Bother You. So we talked about it! / Unfortunately, we'll probably never see anything like a kid's cartoon hosted by John Candy ever again.

Music featured on this show:

Ripped to Shreds – “Opening Salvo” from Luan

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.

Have you met a bigger bunch of cowards in your whole life than Death Metal fans and musicians? Probably not, because those are the only people you know outside of the church your parents still make you go to. Look, unlike confident modern men that command respect by speaking their minds loudly and proudly, Death Metal bands are hiding their true caveman intentions behind unga-bunga vocals nobody can understand. Enough is enough, so I think it's about time that we call in the experts. True Metal and Sexual Position Historian 365 Days of Horror provides essential brains as well as hot sweaty brawn to the discussion, calling as well on big buff brawn-only Breno to sexcavate deep down into Death Metal's dark damp, moist conversation cavern. Who needs paleontologists when the world's finest faileontologists dig into the sensitive subject of violent and offensive lyrics in the 2020 metal scene with about as much grace and finesse as a woolly mammoth hot and horny in heat and ready to tusk the dead fuck out of any snapback wearing neanderthal that dares try it?

You know what is easy to understand? Pop music. So much so, that everybody gets it. It's everywhere. Pumping in through overhead grocery store speakers while you decide which box of processed poison to put in your face. A local FM radio station ear worming through your work day courtesy of a middle-aged coworker's desk radio she got from her estranged son three holiday seasons ago that he paid too little for it to still work. A Pepsi commercial. A car commercial. A YouTube commercial. A ball butter for men commercial. That shit is inescapable, unless you live under a rock or a web forum. So while the world's two greatest metal scientists are on the case of cracking The Cannibal Corpse Code, can they too determine if it's physically possible for a Death Metal fan to listen to a pop song without shitting his camouflage shorts? You'll have to have to annihilate that play button below to find out.

Also, we talk Vince Neil's perfect birthday message, beard care, sad local shows, the Super Bowl half-time show, the importance of butts to the decade, Green Day hating Swedish songwriters, Don Dokken slap-fighting his doctor and somehow so much more. It's actually a show.

Music featured on this show:

ZILF – “Sick" from their upcoming debut

 

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.

Joe and Breno cruelly ousted 365 for a very special duo episode! We're talking: tooth extractions! Swole boi gym playlists! My Chemical Romance is back and Emo Dads are in full effect! But then we get to the meat of this 'sode. We're looking at a list that supposedly ranks the net worth of the top 200 wealthiest metal musicians. This dubiously sourced ranking allows us the opportunity to discuss the greed and pettiness of the now-dead era of musicians actually making real money. Also we get to make some mean-natured jokes about all your favorite 80s metal legends. We uhhhhhh kinda do that for most of the episode. But after we get our fill of cracking jokes we use the whole experience to discuss how artists, even filthy loaded ones, are an outlier. Instead, let's look at who REALLY makes the money in music. HINT: It ain't anyone that does anything you care about. Sit down for a spell and give us a lil listen.

Music featured on this show:

Kobol – “Planet Cleanser” from VOID

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.

Man. We did a lotta shit on this show. Let me try to offer a summary: What the fuck is a Joe Rogan? / KMFDM and Ministry? Whole asses getting exposed / KOTTAK ATTACK / A look at the Libertarian primary headliner / 2000s teen comedies were fuckin' awful / Aerosmith kicked Joey Kramer out of the band so we're pretending to be Eddie Trunk and getting OUTRAGED about it lol / Breno memorializes Sean Reinert after his extremely unexpected passing / Ozzy has Parkinson's and all the metal legends exiting the scene / How in the world does Blabbermouth make money? / Finally, a dramatic reading from Sacramentum. It's a good one, folks.

Music featured on this show:

Ruin Lust – “Prison of Sentient Horror” from Choir of Babel

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.

Your three good boys sat down to talk the affairs of the day. We finally got our first taste of Verotika in an absolutely thrilling trailer. Joe recounts his experience at Power Trip's Evil Beat II and attempts to explain the metal crowds in each major city in Texas. We try to figure out how to steal textbooks and come up short. Creep of the Week: We learn, thanks to Maggie Serota's exhaustive reporting, that Sin Quirin of Ministry is fucking disgusting. The silence from his band is deafening. Elsewhere, Iron Reagan's now-former bass player lost his job, apartment, and band in short order after allegations against him became public. On a lighter note, we discuss the history of cowboy hats on metal dudes. Finally, Joe went to a pay to play show (!) and lived to tell the tale. Let's get this podcast bread, playas.

Music featured on this show:

Rogga Johannson – “The Creepers Are Coming” from Transcending Obscurity Label Sampler 2020

Have something you wanna say to us? Call me at: (903) 884-6533 and leave your message at the tone. Don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe to Toilet Radio on iTunes so you’ll get new episodes automatically. Or use Stitcher if you don’t fuck with Apple.