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Seeking other people’s approval to do anything in your life is like holding yourself hostage by willingly giving someone else the key. You’re allowing them to decide whether you are freed or not. I have 5 tips to help you overcome approval-seeking behavior & lean less on others over time.
Show Notes:
Seeking other people’s approval to do anything in your life is like holding yourself hostage by willingly giving someone else the key. You’re allowing them to decide whether you are freed or not. And this is something that happens over & over & over again.
Constantly seeking approval from others, whether it’s making a decision, validating a thought, how you look, discussing the choices you’ve made or are going to make, it all revolves around people-pleasing & approval-seeking behavior. It also demonstrates a lack of confidence in yourself because you are constantly leaning on others to decide for you.
Here are some quick examples of how this could come across in everyday life:
I want you to ask yourself why you need the approval. If you are unable to come up with an answer, here are some questions that should lead you to an answer:
I want to also make it clear that by seeking someone else’s approval you are not also seeking their respect. If you were only seeking their respect, there would be boundaries in place of what you would or would not do & you would still abide by your own thoughts, feelings, opinions & decisions.
It’s also important to note that by spending all our attention on being accepted & being liked, we lose who we truly are.
Today I want to share with you some tips on how to overcome approval-seeking behavior because constantly seeking external validation will not make life better or easier, but actually harder because there will always be a new challenge for you to live up to with others, rather than leaning on your own decisions & desires.
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabri
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
People pleasing hides who you really are. You end up living an unauthentic life with limited emotional freedom & happiness because you lack the understanding of how important it is to put yourself first & help others second. Come hear 5 tips on how to stop being a people pleaser.
Show Notes:
The biggest thing I've learned about people pleasing is that it hid who I really was. Which is bad, but it’s even worse if you have been practicing this behavior for most of your life. You lose any sort of real identity & end up only being who people want & need you to be. That is the case for me. I have been a people pleaser most of my life because it’s how I kept myself safe from judgment, criticism, physical harm & being shut out. I just wanted to be important to someone and the more I got that feeling by doing everything for everyone else, the more I wanted that feeling. I was addicted to people pleasing.
And there is a ton of emotional damage that goes into this & the way I was treated that contributed to me adopting this behavior. I know this is similar for others, as well. And while it might feel empowering to blame those people in our lives that contributed to this behavior (via manipulation or forced expectations), the actual empowering thing to do is to wean yourself off of this behavior & start putting yourself first. This would include incorporating things like personal boundaries, living authentically, becoming okay with others not liking or approving of you, accepting that you can’t control everything & many others.
Many people might view caring for others & being everything they need as a noble & rewarding act. But the nobility & rewarding aspects of this run out if it’s all you do. If you don’t take the time to take care of yourself, you won’t be able to recharge yourself to keep helping others.
Are you a people pleaser? If you are unsure of whether this is a mindset & way of like you are struggling with, let me share with you some characteristics of a people pleaser:
I want to share with you some tips on how to stop being a people pleaser. These tips will help over time, it’s not a quick fix. Start slowly implementing these things & you’ll start shifting into caring more about your needs first, then accessing the amount of emotional resources you have left to help others.
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabrinajperozzo to chat!
Have any
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
Confidence plays a big role in your desire to pursue your goals & how you present yourself to others. It’s also a general sense of believing in yourself, but many of us lack confidence in certain areas of our lives or don't feel confident at all. Here are 7 tips on how to become more confident!
Show Notes:
Genuinely, I used to believe confidence would just come to me someday. I would just, BAM, have it in me, because it appeared to happen this way to others. Other people I knew just seemed to gain confidence overnight or in a moment’s notice when it was needed most & then have it for the foreseeable future. I envied it for years.
And sadly enough, it wasn’t until our daughter was like 4 or 5, so only a decade ago, making me like 26, that I finally realized I had to decide to have confidence, instead of waiting for it to appear like the tooth fairy was going to leave it under my pillow. Even in the things I was really good at, I lacked confidence. And I tell you this because I’m sure I’m not the only one that feels this way. I might be the only one to admit it on the internet, but still. It needs to be shared that it’s ok if this is how you thought about confidence. Or maybe you thought not everyone gets to have confidence. If you didn’t have it from the beginning, you weren’t getting it at all. But that isn’t true, either.
Or maybe you used to have such strong confidence in yourself and it did seem to come naturally, but it felt like someone took it away. And I say this lightly because I don’t believe we can blame others for changes in how we think, believe or decide to be. People in our lives & environments we spend time can, for sure, influence these things, but all the blame can’t be laid here. This doesn’t diminish the effect these things had on you that shook your confidence. It still matters & is important. And experiences like that can be sometimes worse than not ever having confidence because you know what you lost.
It’s also true that you can have confidence in certain things & not in others. Today I’m speaking more on having confidence, in general, but it’s important to note that you can still use these tips I’m going to give you, even if you only lack confidence in certain parts of your life. It should help boost it all because confidence plays a big role in your desire to pursue your goals & how you present yourself to others. It’s also a general sense of believing in yourself. So more of it isn’t an issue.
Here are 7 tips on how to become more confident in your life:
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabrinajperozzo to chat
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
We shouldn't wait until we are at our weakest point to work on ourselves. We should be taking the time to become more self-aware to understand ourselves better regularly & be conscious of behaviors that indicate we need to work on our emotional health. I have 7 sevens to share with you today to know work needs to be done.
Show Notes:
I used to not take criticism well. I don’t know that I have gotten much better over the years, but I know I’m not as bad as I used to be because I try to remind myself that someone else’s opinion isn’t always true or valid or necessary. And there are situations where it seems like it ALWAYS has to be true, like at work or with your parents, but even those can have some wiggle room. It’s all about how you accept & use the information given. But I do also think it’s wise to evaluate the opinion that is given to you before you toss it away. This also applies to your emotional health.
Someone may make a comment on how you are acting or responding and immediately tell you that you need help. And this doesn’t mean it’s true, but again, when you get someone else’s opinion, it’s your choice on how it gets used. You can ask yourself, as honestly as possible, if what they are saying is true & if you should do anything about it.
Unfortunately, there are many times when we know what someone is saying is true, but you still do nothing about it. This is why I ask you to be as honest as possible with yourself. By not being honest, you waste your own time by not attending to concerns sooner than later & allowing it to fester into something worse.
But we shouldn’t just lean on the feedback we get from others to determine whether or not some emotional work needs to be done. We should be looking inward often to see if anything needs to shift & change. We are not meant to be the same forever, which is why some things work for us for a while & then no longer work anymore & sometimes ever again. This also plays into developing more self-awareness. Taking the time to understand who you are, what your needs are, what you need to keep in check, it’s all important. Staying on top of those things will help you create a more enjoyable & content life. Becoming self-aware allows you to better yourself on the regular & avoid as many emotional pitfalls.
This leads me to my list of ways you can tell that you need to work on your emotional health:
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabrinajperozzo to chat!
Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected] or check out my website, www.sabrinajoy.com where you can listen to all my episodes, send me messages & sign up for my weekly newsletter!
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
The purpose of emotional healing is to learn how to cope, respond & honor our emotions & express ourselves better. This will lead to more content moments in life & less stress. Here are 7 tips on how to go about emotional healing.
Show Notes:
I’m pretty sure I mention how amazing going to therapy is in every single episode. But we can’t ALWAYS be in therapy. Even if you go often, like I do, there are still times that you will be out here in the world, on your own, needing to take your own actions to work on your emotional health & healing.
But maybe you don’t know how to do that. Which I totally get because it can be confusing & overwhelming to figure out what will actually contribute to your healing & what will just make you more stressed because it’s too much. Creating more pain is not the goal here. The purpose of emotional healing is to learn how to cope, respond & honor our emotions & express ourselves better.
If you’re not sure whether or not you’re struggling emotionally, here are some examples:
Unfortunately, practicing any tips for healing may not bring you back to where you were without pain & struggle. You can get pretty close, but each person’s journey will be different with different outcomes & difficulties. But know that it’s not all for nothing. These things we have gone through make us stronger, smarter, more capable & more stable, despite what may be happening to us or around us. And by working on becoming more whole & healing emotionally, your strength, smarts, capabilities & stability just increase.
Today I want to share with you 7 ways you can work on your emotional healing outside of therapy:
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabrinajperozzo to chat!
Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected] or check out my website, www.sabrinajoy.com where you can listen to all my episodes, send me messages & sign up for my weekly newsletter!
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
Engaging in self-love will limit how often we are being highly critical of ourselves, falling into people-pleasing habits & allowing others to treat us badly. Let's learn 7 ways to practice self-love to help us grow even more.
Show Notes:
We spend a ton of time talking about self-care, which is great because it pushed you to put yourself first & realign your priorities to better fit your life & make most things more manageable. But I think self-love gets overlooked because it seems so cheesy & not something that can help right away. But I think we bypass it so often because we don’t really understand what it actually is.
Self-love can seem really boring & worthless. We think that being kind to ourselves isn’t going to change what happens to us, which is true. But changing how you respond to whatever is happening to you or around you WILL help you endure the situation a lot easier & with more understanding & perspective. That’s where self-love comes in.
Practicing self-love will change how you react to what happens to you & around you because you’re not only giving yourself more understanding & grace when you need it, you are challenging yourself to become your best self on the regular because you care enough about how you live your life.
Let me just mention that self-love isn’t only telling yourself affirmations in the mirror. It’s also not something that is linked to selfishness, entitlement or to use an excuse to not get things done.
Today I want to share with you 7 different ways you can practice self-love:
And just know, the reason it’s important to engage in self-love is to limit how often we are being highly critical of ourselves & falling into people-pleasing habits. As well as allowing others to treat us badly. None of these things are things we want.
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabrinajperozzo to chat!
Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected]!
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
When we don’t understand how to regulate our own emotions, we will constantly live on that roller coaster because it’s all we know. Let me share with you some ways to engage in emotional self care that will aid in knowing how to better manage your emotions.
Show Notes:
Growing up I wasn’t taught about emotions at all. I was expected to be happy or nothing at all. It’s where all the people pleasing came from. No wonder I felt like I was constantly on a rollercoaster of emotions when I got older because I had spent so long suppressing it all that when I finally felt safe enough to let it all out, it was chaos.
When we don’t understand how to regulate our own emotions, we will constantly live on that roller coaster because it’s all we know. We won’t understand that there are different ways to express your feelings or deal with negative experiences or better ways to cope with guilt, shame, anger, embarrassment & a host of other things. The simplest, yet most important benefit of learning how to regulate & manage your emotions moment to moment is a higher quality of life. You’ll find that you are happier because you aren’t spending so much time focusing on reigning it all in. You aren’t living in that pit of despair.
You will also know how to get through more difficult situations that come up. You won’t feel so out of control with whatever is happening around you and/or to you & know how to ground yourself, while still acknowledging how you are feeling.
One of the best ways to get better at honoring your emotions, learning to manage these better & develop healthy coping mechanisms is to engage in emotional self-care. This would include several different ways to bring awareness to what we are feeling when we feel it, accept it, honor it & do what’s necessary to not let it control you but guide you in understanding yourself better.
And don’t worry, as I mentioned in my story at the beginning, none of this came naturally to me & it usually doesn’t for most, unless you have people in your life to help you understand your emotions & yourself more. I am avidly doing this with my daughter.
Today I want to share with you 7 ways to engage in Emotional Self-Care:
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabrinajperozzo to chat!
Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected]!
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
Recovering from anxious days might look like evenings in front of the tv with a glass of wine, but that isn't actual healing. If you want to work on lowering your anxiety, you need to get to the source of the problem. Start from the inside out knowing that is the best way to feel better.
Show Notes:
I think most of us deal with anxiety & stress in some capacity of our lives. Life is crazy & unpredictable sometimes, so of course we experience a range of emotions in response to what’s happening around us & to us. We all may not deal with it on the same level, but it’s still something we understand & would benefit learning more about. And in the past I’ve spoken about ways we can recognize our own anxiety, but just for a little refresher here are some things that could mean you are in an anxious state:
As always, I encourage you to speak with a professional if you are unsure of what you personally could be dealing with, as they will be able to help you figure it out best. Plus, having someone else to help you understand yourself better is never a bad thing.
Now I want to start by mentioning that this is a topic that is covered heavily online. And a lot of the suggestions for what to do when dealing with anxiety is to listen to some music, go to a workout class, have a laugh with friends, or drink less caffeine. And while these are fine suggestions, none of these are going to help you long term. These are all quick fixes. These will not help you conquer certain triggers that induce anxiety in you or really make you feel like you are getting a handle on not letting your anxiety get the best of you. Being more in control of how we respond while dealing with anxiety should be the goal.
Now, this means that the suggestions I give you today will be more focused on understanding why the anxiety is there & tackling it from the inside out. We’re talking dealing with your emotions, like usual, which isn’t as easy as just watching your favorite tv show to distract yourself.
Today I want to share with you 5 ways to recover from anxious days:
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabrinajperozzo to chat!
Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected]!
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
When we think about things we need more of, we always think about THINGS & not actual changes in emotions & attitudes that will get us farther than happiness placeholders. Let me share with you 5 things we need more of!
Show Notes:
I saw a graphic with a list of 13 things we need more of like sleep, sunsets, long walks, things like that. But it wasn’t those things that inspired me to talk about figuring out what we need more of, it was the realization that we spend so much time figuring out what we need to get rid of & not what needs to be added back in.
And yes, we do speak on some habits that would be helpful to add back in here & there, but even considering that made me really think about how we put most of our focus on what needs to go. Really think about it. When we make goals, resolutions & grand decisions, we are deciding more on what needs to be cut out then added back in. Even going so far as to encourage people not to add more things to their lives because we can become overloaded & overwhelmed. Which is true, but there are so many things to consider adding into our lives because we actually need it, rather than just want it.
There are so many things in life we could consider adding into our lives just because we want it. I love getting new shoes, new clothes, a new purse, new throw pillows for an already overflowing bed & couch, or a new car. And even outside of material things we could want more friends, more money, more time or more attention. But these are more selfish desires. I know this will make some people upset to hear. But the desire & achievement of these things will not solve the deeper problem you’re trying to overcome.
We need to focus on needs that will help us on a deeper level. Things that will help us heal as a whole person that tap into the emotions we have hidden away & the ones on display. We can’t continue to pretend that pacifying our ever changing & passing needs will fix all our problems.
Also, I made sure to include in the title of this episode that we need to be focusing on our own needs first. This is obviously a topic that needs to be dove into deeper in another episode, but it’s still important to note here. It’s a cliche saying we need to take care of ourselves first if we want to help anyone else the best we can. But it’s true. I find that most cliches are true. Annoying, but true. How can you do the most for someone else if you don’t do the most for yourself first? For others in this life, we are there to help fill them up, not be the one that is constantly drained all the time.
This leads to me sharing with you 5 very important needs I believe we should focus on getting more of:
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabrinajperozzo to chat!
Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected]!
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
Vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness. And becoming vulnerable doesn't have to happen overnight. You can take it day-by-day & slowly implement it into your life. Let me share with you 5 ways to increase your vulnerability.
Show Notes:
One of my goals in life is to convince as many people as possible that being vulnerable is a good thing. It’s helpful to you because you are allowing yourself to fully feel your response to what’s going on around you through your emotions. You are also allowing yourself to be seen for who you really are, which can help with self-acceptance & self-confidence. You being vulnerable can also help others because you’re setting an example that it’s okay to be this way, to be real.
To expand on what it means to be vulnerable, I heard it described in one of the best ways ever: vulnerability is a sacrifice of comfort. This couldn’t be more true. When you are truly vulnerable, you are not hiding in your comforts. You are not always taking the easy road. You are not avoiding the hard things in life for the sake of not wanting to fail or not being liked as much. You are stepping outside your comfort zone & taking chances & allowing yourself to be caught in the line of fire with others that may not agree with your point of view or the way you live life. You are opening yourself up to rejection or acceptance. It can be hard at times, but it’s worth it because of the true freedom you feel exposing yourself emotionally.
Being vulnerable can be scary, but as always, I encourage you to take it day-by-day in your approach of incorporating it into your life.
Here are 5 ways you can increase vulnerability in your life:
Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.
Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo to say hi or on Clubhouse @sabrinajperozzo to chat!
Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected]!
Support the show
Watch the Video Version of RPG: https://www.youtube.com/@realpositivegirl/podcasts
Buy the Planner on AMAZON!: https://amzn.to/3WwthT2
Visit me on Instagram or TikTok: @sabrinajoyperozzo
Email Me: [email protected]
From the publisher's feed
So many people don't know where to start with getting back on the road to becoming their best selves & improving their mental health. This is where the RealPositiveGirl podcast is helpful. The…