She Wasn't Born Yesterday

About the Guest

Colleen Hirst is an accomplished psychologist and family therapist affiliated with Merrylands Counselling. With a rich professional history in psychology and therapy, Colleen specialises in helping individuals understand and break negative relationship patterns. She is proficient in applying various therapeutic models and theories, such as attachment theory and John Gottman's methods, to enhance relationship dynamics and promote personal growth. Her insights are particularly valuable for developing secure attachments and improving interpersonal connections.

Key Takeaways:

• Understanding Patterns: Each individual has emotional blueprints shaped by upbringing and life experiences that govern relationship behaviors and attachment styles.
• Importance of Self-awareness: Identifying negative patterns is crucial; individuals must recognise their contributions to relationship dynamics to effect change.
• John Gottman's Principles: The Four Horsemen model provides insights into destructive relationship behaviors, underscoring the need to replace criticism with soft startups and stonewalling with self-soothing techniques.
• Connection Over Communication: True relationship resilience is built on connection and shared meaning, not just communication skills or conflict resolution.
• Therapeutic Interventions: Even entrenched patterns can be altered with intentional actions, as therapy can provide a framework for developing more positive interaction cycles.

Notable Quotes:

1. "We are all patterns, all of us. We've all got these internal working models for how we emotionally connect." — Colleen Hirst
2. "Good communication is a fantastic and vital skill, but when we lose connection, that's when the conflict comes." — Colleen Hirst
3. "Every time we say no to our automatic pilot, we're starting to change the internal script." — Colleen Hirst
4. "My top tip is connection… How can we build this relationship because I want a future with you?" — Colleen Hirst
5. "The main thing is not about active listening; it's about being there for your partner." — Colleen Hirst

Resources:

• Maryland's Counselling: Merrylands Counselling Psychology Practice (Gaining additional insights and support)
• John Gottman: Various models discussed, including the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse and the Sound Relationship House Model.
• Attachment Theory: Explored in relation to early life experiences affecting adult relationships.

 

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About the Guest:

Jo Starling is the President of the Women’s Recreational Fishing League, Australia’s only nationwide women-focused recreational fishing community. A creative consultant and strategist, Jo uses fishing as a platform to empower women, build confidence, and support personal growth.

Key Takeaways:

• Jo Starling's recovery from trauma was significantly bolstered by the empowerment and community found in women's only fishing leagues.
• The Women's Recreational Fishing League encourages women to break traditional gender roles and learn skills typically associated with men, fostering a sense of self-reliance and confidence.
• Fishing serves as a strategic and engaging activity that allows women to manage stress and remain in the present moment.
• The league's initiatives aim to address the gender imbalance in recreational fishing by offering a supportive environment where women can grow and thrive.
• Personal growth and professional success can result from challenging limiting beliefs and tackling perceived male-dominant spaces.

Notable Quotes:

1. "Fishing prowess is not sexually transmitted. It is not something that you can just plug and play."
2. "The power of recreational fishing is that as a woman, you are gaining the capacity to be self-reliant in every way, which allows you to know that your circumstances are yours."
3. "You cannot have self-esteem if you do not have control over your circumstances. Fishing gave me back control of my life."
4. "Women need to stop playing to the masculine and embrace our own leadership styles. It's not about out-menning the men."
5. "The transformational power of the Women's Recreational Fishing League is demonstrated in how women can now do things they once thought were impossible."

Resources:

• Women's Recreational Fishing League on Facebook
• Jo Starling's professional mentoring course, "Hooked"

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

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About the Guest:

Tori Sanderson is the Managing Director of Avian, an Canberra based, consultancy focused on human-centred design, digital strategy, accessibility, and digital service delivery. She has more than 15 years’ experience in digital strategy and product consulting, and holds an Arts (Honours) degree in Chinese Studies as well as a Masters of Development Studies. Her work sits at the intersection of design, technology, and strategy, helping organisations improve and transform their digital services.

Key Takeaways:

• AI's Gender Impact: AI threatens roles largely held by women, particularly in entry-level and procedural jobs.
• Government's Role: Government intervention is essential to regulate AI's integration into the workforce and protect entry-level opportunities.
• Engagement Gap: Women are less engaged with AI technologies compared to men, risking further exclusion from tech advancements.
• Career Shifts: More flexible career pathways are emerging, though existing disparities in senior roles remain a challenge.
• Value of Human Connection: Fields dependent on human-to-human interaction, like counseling, hold a unique resilience against AI takeover.

Notable Quotes:

1. "I think if we don't start engaging, particularly as women, we run a real risk of entrenching some of these disparities."
2. "We’re still exploring whether the technology lives up to the hype, and it’s anyone’s game still a little bit."
3. "AI always wants you to feel like you're right and wants you to feel like it's right."
4. "We need to support those who are coming up…so that we're not just the isolated exception."
5. "I think that is a space that government can do a great job on, is actually kind of tempering some of those impacts."

Resources:

• Avian: Avian helps teams design, deliver, and sustain better digital services. For people, systems, and public good.

 

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Malcolm Boyd is the Principal and Director of Stewardship Wealth Management in Sydney. He has many years of experience in financial advice and wealth management, and his publicly listed focus areas include wealth preservation, tax positioning, wealth transfer, protection, and philanthropic giving

Key Takeaways:

• Understanding Wealth Disparity: Women typically hold less wealth than men, making financial planning crucial, especially as they approach 40 and beyond.
• Importance of Housing Stability: Ensuring a secure living environment can play a significant role in long-term financial security.
• Planning for Life Transitions: Be prepared for significant life changes such as divorce or redundancy by having a financial plan that prioritises liquidity.
• Value of Financial Education: Regardless of current knowledge or financial status, proactive financial education can significantly improve one's financial situation.
• Role of Financial Management: Professional financial advice can help tailor strategies to individual circumstances, fostering better financial outcomes and security.

Notable Quotes:

1. "Divorce can be a really painful wealth destroying event. It has financial impacts, it has impacts on the family." - Malcolm Boyd
2. "Wealth is built slowly over time. Just make some progress, that's still progress." - Malcolm Boyd
3. "If you can practice saving and get some momentum around that, those goals will come." - Malcolm Boyd
4. "It's good to have oversight over your finances of your family. So, yeah, it's being aware of it, how much you've got, and where it is that's really important." - Malcolm Boyd
5. "Trying to make sure that people aren't paying too much tax, making sure the investments are being well behaved and stay on target." - Malcolm Boyd

Resources:

• Stewardship Financial Planning: Learn more about Malcolm Boyd's services and approach to financial planning. Website here
• Rich Dad Poor Dad: A book mentioned that discusses buying assets versus liabilities.

 

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

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Tim Dyer is a trainer, mentor, and supervisor who works with pastors, church consultants, and Christian leaders across many denominations. His work focuses on clergy care, leadership development, conflict management, resilience and self-care, trauma and recovery, and the health of congregations. He also enjoys bushwalking in the Tasmanian Highlands

Key Takeaways:

• Understanding Burnout: Burnout is a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion that signifies the end of a prolonged period of stress.
• Types of Burnout: There are multiple types of burnout including overload, blocked, and one-way burnout, each with unique triggers and signs.
• Physical and Emotional Signs: Persistent fatigue, illness, and diminished empathy can be indicators of burnout, often creeping up unrecognised.
• Managing Expectations: The ability to say 'no' and recognise one's limits is crucial in preventing burnout, especially for those in caregiving roles.
• Micro-Recovery Breaks: Short breaks, unplugging from technology, and engaging in personally fulfilling activities are essential strategies for maintaining well-being.

Notable Quotes:

• "It's the most empathetic people, the most caring people that are at the highest risk of burnout."
• "Burnout is kind of a depletion state at the end of a long period of stress."
• "Imagine somebody who's actively involved in caring for children might be actively involved in their community…that's kind of like a recipe for burnout."
• "Turning our phones off and having a break from that kind of constant activity is a really important process."
• "If we keep on sacrificing ourselves, you've got nothing for others."

Resources:

• Tim Dyer: Leadership Training and Development Specialist
• Gordon Parker: Noted for his research in burnout, particularly the book released in 2021 that expanded the view of burnout significantly.

 

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

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About the Guest:

Steve Pearce is the CEO of Surf Life Saving New South Wales, Australia's largest volunteer surf lifesaving organization. With over 30 years in emergency services, he has led key initiatives for coastal safety, including advanced shark management programs with drones and tagging, plus expanded education efforts. Pearce is noted for his strategic leadership in balancing safety and marine protection along NSW beaches.

Key Takeaways:

• The increase in shark attacks has prompted enhanced surveillance using drones at 80 locations across New South Wales, with over 44,000 flights monitored since summer.
• Pearce highlights the ecological balance challenge, questioning the implications and effectiveness of shark culling as a viable strategy.
• Surf Life Saving New South Wales places a strong emphasis on psychological support for lifesavers, given their frequent exposure to rescues and traumatic events.
• The Shark Smart App provides real-time monitoring of tagged sharks, allowing beachgoers to make informed decisions about where and when to swim.
• Education and awareness efforts, particularly targeting tourists and diverse community groups, are essential in minimizing the risk associated with coastal activities.

Notable Quotes:

1. "We are seeing more sharks because we're actually looking for more."
2. "Technology is probably more of the greater answer to this in regards to greater surveillance, greater warnings, people's awareness."
3. "Humans aren't in the food chain of sharks. They use a bite as a sensory mechanism to determine what something is."
4. “The coast is our workplace, our place of work. But this is also the marine creatures’ place as well.”
5. "Anything that enhances the safety of swimmers in the water, we would support."

Resources:

• Surf Life Saving NSW
• Shark Smart App

 

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Tim Dyer is a trainer, mentor, and supervisor who works with pastors, church consultants, and Christian leaders across many denominations. His work focuses on clergy care, leadership development, conflict management, resilience and self-care, trauma and recovery, and the health of congregations. He also enjoys bushwalking in the Tasmanian Highlands

Key Takeaways:

• Understanding Burnout: Burnout is a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion that signifies the end of a prolonged period of stress.
• Types of Burnout: There are multiple types of burnout including overload, blocked, and one-way burnout, each with unique triggers and signs.
• Physical and Emotional Signs: Persistent fatigue, illness, and diminished empathy can be indicators of burnout, often creeping up unrecognised.
• Managing Expectations: The ability to say 'no' and recognise one's limits is crucial in preventing burnout, especially for those in caregiving roles.
• Micro-Recovery Breaks: Short breaks, unplugging from technology, and engaging in personally fulfilling activities are essential strategies for maintaining well-being.

Notable Quotes:

• "It's the most empathetic people, the most caring people that are at the highest risk of burnout."
• "Burnout is kind of a depletion state at the end of a long period of stress."
• "Imagine somebody who's actively involved in caring for children might be actively involved in their community…that's kind of like a recipe for burnout."
• "Turning our phones off and having a break from that kind of constant activity is a really important process."
• "If we keep on sacrificing ourselves, you've got nothing for others."

Resources:

• Tim Dyer: Leadership Training and Development Specialist
• Gordon Parker: Noted for his research in burnout, particularly the book released in 2021 that expanded the view of burnout significantly.

 

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Key Takeaways:

• Gambling addiction is not about greed but rather escapism from trauma and emotional distress.
• The transitional journey from addiction to recovery is deeply personal and requires honesty, vulnerability, and connection with supportive groups.
• Engaging in a spiritual journey or finding a higher power can provide peace, guidance, and strength in overcoming addiction.
• Gambling addiction often results in severe financial loss and emotional despair; professional help and support groups are crucial for recovery.
• Open communication and connection are vital in resisting the secrecy that fuels addictive behaviors.

Notable Quotes:

1. "The compulsion to gamble is so strong, nothing else matters." – Caroline
2. "I was exhausted. I just couldn't go on. And I was so suicidal that I needed to get help." – Caroline
3. "Listening to other people's journeys, their hope, their experience, their strengths. It gave me hope." – Kelly
4. "I just feel like that God's been pulling me towards Him whether I've wanted to know that or accept that." – Kelly
5. "We're very good at creating permission slips for ourselves." – Kelly

 

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

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Collett is a psychologist, qualified teacher, speaker, and internationally published author, with 25 years' experience working in private and public schools, as well as in private practice.

Visit Raising Teens for more resources, click here for Collett's books, or join the discussion on Facebook.

PURCHASE the book for $1.39AUD here at Amazon

Raewyn Elsegood is a seasoned author and chaplain renowned for her empathetic writing and expertise in grief counseling. With over ten years of experience as a trained writer, Raewyn has channeled her profound personal experience of losing her daughter into her work, penning "21 Gifts" as a testament to her healing journey. Her professional history includes extensive work as a chaplain, where she has supported countless individuals in times of grief with her compassionate presence and insightful guidance.

 

Key Takeaways:

• Grief is Messy and Individual: Raewyn underscores that grief is not a linear process but unique to each person and can evolve over time.
• Writing as Healing: "21 Gifts" harnesses the power of writing as a therapeutic outlet, documenting a mother's journey through loss by reflecting on life's gifts.
• The Power of Presence: Offering support to those grieving involves simply "being there," as a witness to their experience without needing to fix it.
• Faith's Role in Grief: Raewyn candidly shares her struggle and reconciliation with faith amidst her grief, revealing the comfort and complexity it brings.
• Lessons in Legacy: Through her book and public speaking, Raewyn continues to honor Amy's legacy, teaching that healing often involves transforming personal pain into purposeful action.

Notable Quotes:

1. "Grief is very messy, and even trained professionals need to surrender to it."
2. "Losing Amy didn't mean losing my purpose as her mother. Writing 21 Gifts, establishing her scholarship, speaking to others; this is mothering her legacy."
3. "What I want people to feel as they read this book is they're walking with a companion, and I want them to have hope in their hurting heart."
4. "In our fear, we stay away, not knowing what to do. But there's no perfect words. Please just show up."
5. "Worry is normal, but it is a waste of time."

Resources:

• Raewyn Elsegood's Website
• Book: 21 Gifts

 

Click here to contact Collett or ask her a question or Click here to contact the Raising Teens team.

Collett is a psychologist, qualified teacher, speaker, and internationally published author, with 25 years' experience working in private and public schools, as well as in private practice.

Visit Raising Teens for more resources, click here for Collett's books, or join the discussion on Facebook.

Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app, Facebook or Instagram.

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Amanda Rose is a prominent media commentator, keynote speaker, and women's business advocate known for her insightful analysis of the media landscape. She is dedicated to promoting women's financial security and empowering individuals in business through her work as an entrepreneur and advocate for media authenticity.

Key Takeaways:

• The controversy surrounding Kyle and Jackie O's fallout at Kiss FM could be a PR stunt aimed at boosting ratings and reshaping their roles in commercial radio.
• Amanda argues for the necessity of fresh, local talent in the media, calling for an industry shake-up to replace repetitive content with authentic and moral broadcasting.
• The shift towards independent media and podcasts stems from public demand for genuine, value-driven content, reflective of a broader industry trend.
• Financial security for women in business and media is crucial, as emphasised by Amanda, who advocates for economic empowerment and ethical practice.
• An informed listener base and proactive lobbying can push regulators to enforce stricter guidelines against harmful media practices.

Notable Quotes:

1. "I think it's a PR stunt… Their ratings were dying." – Amanda Rose
2. "Kyle has been repulsive for a very long time." – Amanda Rose
3. "Bring back the witty comedy without having to be vulgar." – Amanda Rose
4. "We've lost. We're actually telling the next generation it's okay to not be who you are." – Amanda Rose
5. "Stop repeating the same people (on air). My gosh." – Amanda Rose

Support the show, a product of Hope Media: https://hope1032.com.au/donate/2211A-pod/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.