The right hemisphere of your brain is your “wild creature mind,” says Steve Biddulph, the Australian author, psychologist, and family therapist known for his work on parenting and child development (including his seminal book Raising Boys).

It is richly connected to our body & memories, including memories that we no longer consciously recall. It communicates with us constantly via bodily sensations, sending us important messages.

We can tap into that, and we can help our children tap into that — and, in doing so, help us all realize that “emotions are not the whole story,” Steve says.

Try using the phrase “there is something in me” when discussing emotions and the accompanying sensations. There is a big difference between “I am furiously angry” and “There is something in me that is furiously angry.” That linguistic tweaking allows you to gain a bit of separation, to observe and notice your thoughts and sensations. The goal is not to eliminate the feeling or sensation, but to learn from it.

Anxiety isn’t something to eliminate

Anxiety isn’t necessarily problematic. It’s not a troublesome emotion that needs to be eliminated, Steve says.

“Anxiety is your wild creature mind, slashing at the bars, yelling at you,” he says. “Rightly or wrongly, it wants to get your attention about something.” So, when you feel anxiety, pause. Feel where it lives in your body. Try describing those sensations to yourself. Value, rather than dismiss, the sensations and experience of anxiety.

Your wild creature mind — the right hemisphere of your brain — is intended to work in conjunction with the left hemisphere of your brain. Yet because our societies have long prioritized rational, logical thinking, many of us have learned to ignore the stirrings of our wild creature mind. Tapping into it will allow us to “walk more slowly through life, love more deeply, and be happy with less,” Steve says.

 

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

stevebiddulph.com — Steve’s online home

Wild Creature Mind: The Neuroscience Breakthrough that Helps You Transform Anxiety and Live a Fiercely Loving Life, by Steve Biddulph

Fully Human with Raising Boys Author Steve Biddulph — ON BOYS episode

Steve Biddulph on Raising Boys — ON BOYS episode

 

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