Listener question: Ok if we are life’s unlimited potential itself, why is it that the self seems to have a contracted dense heavy default mode? It’s almost like a magnetic pull to heaviness, overthinking, and unhelpful patterns that are obvious toxic and not in line with the deep lust for aliveness that seems to get lost underneath it all. 

Listener question: 

‘It really makes sense that this body here would move out of the way of whatever would damage it....the form will do what is necessary [in that moment] to survive.  And it can do this without any concept of self, any concept of past or future, any concept of separation.

Our concept of self is not what is keeping us safe, keeping harmful others at bay.  Response is happening regardless of the idea of self.’ [taken from SANE: getting real with reality]

Would this apply to the damage of rejection and the threat to survival it poses, or is that a concept that only a separate self can come up with?

Listener question: if everything is perfect then why would we look at insecurity or behaviour? Isn't that just what is? 

Listener question: Is it not just as much to learn about the illusion of self and others when we feel great? I was thinking about when we are in love and when we feel "on top" and "in the flow" when for example work seems to go very well. 

When we are in love we have this illusionary thinking about "the other person" and maybee underneath a scenario of how great it will be together and also we maybee have a great feeling about "our self" when the other person is also in love. Isn't this as much an illusion and a posibility to learn as when we are afraid of someone or that we are not liked by "the other"?

And when "the self" think it is doing great at work, getting fabulous results etc and everything seems to flow, it is very easy for "the self" to unconsciously take credit for it and feel safe. 

But often when we feel good we tend to think that this is how it is supposed to be and that we are on the right track. 

Listener question: I have a question, on behalf of my wife.  She suffers from severe chronic pain. I would like to read her some of your writing, probably starting with SANE.  However, to her, the idea that she should look on these intolerable conditions or circumstances as just part of the content of life, or as something to be accepted as just part of the Present, is insulting and like a slap in the face.  It is hard, maybe impossible, for her to NOT believe in the reality of the constant pain with which she has to live.  To her, if the universe is 'Life' and she and the pain are part of that Life, then the universe sucks and Life is not much more than cruelty and misery and a horrible joke.

What do you tell someone who lives with such conditions?  Do you have any ideas for how I might be able to help her cope in the Present?

Listener question: When you experience that awakening and realisation, how do you know the awakening and realisation, that feeling of total awareness and love, are not just more products of conditioning? How does anyone know that you are not just thinking and believing this is the reality of love and awakening?

Listener question: 

Staying with the contraction, not running away from it, we do get info. But how to interpret the info if the only reference point you are aware of is in the story you have lived?

 If life tells me to go right I will gladly go right. But isn’t my interpretation of what life is telling me always based upon good and/or bad within the story? Maybe even creating a new one as I sometimes see happening ( “God spoke to me and he wants me to……..(fill in whatever you want)..because I am the chose none”)..

 Am I not (even within the story) exactly where I should be?! And, accepting that, allowing that, not running away from that, is there anywhere else to go to find the peace and happiness and love we are here, at this very moment, with exactly the amount of money, energy, time and connection that is now experienced?!

 I think not..End of story..

And then? Left or right? And why?

Please throw me a life-line here…

Listener question: I have a question which relates to teenage children and my developing understanding around this conversation. 
As a parent I’ve loved, supported and guided my children on their path to become independent young people. When they behave in a way which goes against my own values, beliefs, and rules for living, I find myself in a state of suffering. I’m beginning to see that this suffering is caused by my own need to feel in control in order that my ‘self’ feels stable. I guess you would say that their behaviour is nothing to do with me and that I shouldn’t take it personally, but I do, as I feel it is my responsibility and I’ve always taken my responsibilities seriously, especially when it comes to my children. 
This is where I’m a little stuck, can you point me in the direction to see something different here please? It all looks so real when I’m in the thick of it all! Is it just a question of letting go of resistance and control? 

Exploring how often, the asking is reinforcing the apparent reality in which the self cannot get what it wants. 

Exploring the impossibility of a self existing separately from the body, mind or environment.