Superpowered Mind with Clare Dimond

Once again just when I think I have got my head around this conversation there is a podcast that makes me want to yell at you!

I do see that there is often a reflection out there of something in myself when I  judge others.

Is this true EVERY time we judge others? What about Hitler??

Surely I don’t have to look at myself when there is such hideous behaviour.

I am kind of dreading and also looking forward to your response as I am sure there is more for me to see…

Thank you fo always making us look at ourselves!

Repressed feeelings of abandonment keep surfacing again and again and there is confusion spiritually.. do I stay with them and the thoughts arising or look from awareness? Sometimes I stay as the feelings and it’s very uncomfortable and sometimes I see them from afar. Then there’s overthinking about how to deal with it all and even as I say that it sounds crazy  like who is trying to do that? 

Are we smart enough to know how smart animals are?' by Frans de Waal. The Sunday Book

― Mary Oliver

Can you say more about the idea of self centeredness qualities when there is no self?

There is a best friend of my partner's who this mind judges as cheap, selfish, know it all, and self centered. Which of course is just a reflection of how I am being...or rather what this system does based on what is believed. And the same is true for him.

There is resistance to not liking him, to feeling these judgments. Resisting them makes it worse. Beyond noticing this system flip flopping in pretending to like him out of politeness and likely being a jerk...what is there to see?

Thank you,

I am probably someone who keeps things, mysery in place, especially hurtful thinking, living, that I don't recognize it anymore etc. 

Or I am just to scared to do something about , acknowledge it. Or don't care. 

New or nice things are not allowed, I can't or don't know how to enjoy that anymore. Or if I feel it, it's not important, enough etc. or I numb. (automatically). 

For me it almost means 'that's just how I am' , sometimes it feels I am' killing', destroying myself, giving up. 

In a way I feel like a lost person. Asking, talking to people but no change. Listening, reading, sometimes a bit of relief. Tired of it. (you will probably say, I am not..) 

Maybe I am too defensive, controlling, protecting. That I don't want to change. 

When I ask 'what's at stake', nothing is I guess. 

The high tone in my head is not helping it's there all the time, never quiet. 

Feeling like a robot quite often because of this, probably all thinking. 

I don't know what I am asking, I guess I just want to share, vent.

I guess I am scared.. 

When you say "that's why we're here" I just can't seem to get on with the video, my mind is just too intrigued by this as it sounds like you say we have "a purpose" on this earth. Could you maybe please elaborate? 

I’m writing you because I am desperate. Since the days before 3P, when I was in a constant state of desperation, living from one therapy session to another, I haven’t been so desperate. It feels like total regression.

I reached a point of total hopelessness. You say it’s something good, but it feels just awful. I took your advice and let the topic of weight loss rest for the duration of the Home course. This showed me a total unhappiness I am living in, like being totally separated from life. Or maybe I cannot be separate from life, but I don’t want the things life gives me, I fight with them, and I can’t stop myself from fighting. My whole day is a fight and desperation and not wanting to.

It's like realising in what dark place I was living all the time, now not being able to paint over it with hope and looking for a good feeling or looking for the innate wellbeing. Is there even such a thing, or is this just another nice sounding concept?

And yes, I want this to go away, and you say, this is what keeps it in place. I get that, so here again no hope at all, because how could I honestly not want the suffering to go away? I can’t imagine.

I don’t even have a question, because the only thing I would want now is for all this to go away and for me to finally be happy. And this is the suffering.

I also would like to understand something, but it seems to me that I just don’t get anything. I don’t know what is true, well what I wrote is true for me at the moment. And this other truth you talk about, I don’t know what this is, I don’t know what this would even help, if I am an entity controlled by a program. The more I think about it, the more it gets confusing.

If the system does what the system does, and only an understanding of the system might change the system or not, who does this understanding, and if there is no self, who has this conversation anyway, and what is there to be seen anyway? It seems to me I understand nothing. All I know is there is this heaviness in the body and tears.

Thank you for reading, it’s good to have someone to write to.

I recently had my second child and am struggling with the demands of life with two small children. My question is about parenting: what is it about this relationship that it can bring up so much suffering? What do you think this understanding can offer to parents in particular? I was also wondering if you would ever offer a course specifically aimed at parents as I feel there is so much to explore there. I would love to hear your thoughts on this. 

How Not To Die by Michael Greger MD. Sunday Book