In this Taboo Tuesday discussion, author, illustrator, and mental health advocate, Jordan Sondler, joins Dr. Emily to talk about what it was like going public about therapy and working on her mental health in her book, "Feel It Out: The Guide to Getting in Touch with Your Goals, Your Relationships, and Yourself." Sondler says that what started as an illustrated book for single people on how to survive a break-up turned into a book for every single person that covers many of life’s challenges from strengthening self-awareness to how to adopt a dog. 

Staying emotionally fit takes work and repetition. That's why the Emotionally Fit podcast with psychologist Dr. Emily Anhalt delivers short, actionable Emotional Push-Ups every Tuesday and Thursday to help you build a better practice of mental health, and surprising, funny, and shocking conversations on Taboo Tuesdays - because the things we’re most hesitant to talk about are also the most normal. Join us to kickstart your emotional fitness. Let's flex those feels and do some reps together!

EPISODE RESOURCES:

Follow Jordan Sondler on Instagram.

Check out Jordan’s book Feel It Out: The Guide to Getting in Touch with Your Goals, Your Relationships, and Yourself 

Learn more about Jordan’s work at Jordansondler.com

Photo of Jordan Sondler by @erichelgas

Thank you for listening! Follow Dr. Emily on Twitter, and don’t forget to follow, rate, review and share the show wherever you listen to podcasts! #EmotionallyFit 

The Emotionally Fit podcast is produced by Coa, your gym for mental health. Katie Sunku Wood is the show’s producer from StudioPod Media with additional editing and sound design by nodalab, and featuring music by Milano. Special thanks to the entire Coa crew!

JUMP STRAIGHT INTO:

(03:27) -  Why Jordan started opening up about therapy - “I got into this work when I went through a breakup a few years ago and started suffering from anxiety attacks around that time. I went on medication, but I also felt like I had to find an outlet for myself. I started with the dating, and then, at a certain point in time, I had this idea that I really wanted to work on a book.”

(5:06) - Going from client work to something more personal - “When I sold this book and I started making it, I realized, ‘Uh-oh, this is all I want to do anymore.’ But it's really hard to go to all your clients and be like, ‘Hey, do you want to just hire me for totally different work?’" 

(09:06) - Talking about therapy - “I will tell any person—like my barista at Starbucks—I'm in therapy. I will tell the world that I'm on SSRIs, because I really attribute being in therapy to everything great that has ever happened to me.”

(14:29) - The downside of sharing such personal work - “Sometimes I am questioning myself like, ‘Am I posting this because I want a bunch of strangers to like cheer me up?’ And then I'm like, ‘No, that's not why I'm posting it.’ But that just so happens to be a side effect.” 

(21:21)  - From Jordan’s book “Feel It Out” -  “Put your needs first. Don't make yourself small. See a therapist. Compromise, but be sure it's balanced. Never love anyone more than yourself. Don't bury your feelings to avoid confrontation. Take trips without each other. Be open and honest from the beginning.”

(28:03) - Misconceptions about therapy - “A lot of people ask me, ‘Wow, do you always know what you're going to talk about? Or do you go to therapy to talk about a specific thing? The answer is no.”