With a particular story dominating Pete’s consciousness this week, there’s only one place we could start: penis enlargement surgery. Happy Monday!

Elsewhere, Pete’s sporting a new haircut courtesy of a random shopkeeper, we put the music world to rights and a listener has documented the *exact* moment they realised they weren’t young anymore. Anyone else heard of Bloc Party?

Email: [email protected] or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.

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Today, the lads dive into the perplexing world of rattan furniture: What is it made of? Why is it so expensive? And why was Luke’s cat, Jasper, so obsessed with it? Pete then shares a story about his dad randomly bringing home a snooker table and a bag of balls, sparking a debate about the most inconvenient gifts (spoiler: Luke once sent someone a box of crickets).

Elsewhere, Pete declares that the true meaning of life is enjoying the art of antagonising friends and colleagues. Plus, he opens up about his ultra-cautious approach to proposing—it’s a yes-or-nothing policy for this self-proclaimed worrisome little chap.

What's the most annoying gift you've ever received? Tell us at [email protected]

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It’s a chaotic start to the week as Pete confesses to accidentally installing a secret camera in an Airbnb, while Luke can’t resist another dig at Jake Humphrey’s “sexy chat.”

Elsewhere, Pete considers taking wrestling classes as his January fitness fix and reveals some questionable dessert choices - dog cake and Baileys-flavoured squirty cream, anyone?

Plus, a listener’s bizarre Airbnb tale and a fiery debate: are rivalries just plain silly? It’s everything you didn’t know you needed.

Got any wilder Airbnb stories? Email us at [email protected]

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Today, Pete can’t stop raving about WD40, while Luke ponders how parenting life has crushed his spontaneity. Then, the lads debate nap time efficiency, the dread of “circling back in the new year,” and whether cash really is king...should we really be handing a stack of cash straight to the doctor?

Elsewhere, Pete pitches "Lukey in Lagos", a foolproof idea for Luke to become a YouTube sensation, while Luke debates the right approach to plane food — spoiler: just say no. Plus, the lads have a Beatles impression-off, and a much needed follow up to the Grimsby fish shop saga.

Give us your best WD40 stories here: [email protected]

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This week, Donny shares how his infamous “C*** mug” kept making surprise appearances during adoption meetings, leading to a frantic mug switcheroo every time it landed in the wrong hands. Of course, this sparks a full-on mug-off: Who’s got the best collection? Does Luke have a serious mug hoarding problem? And why does tea taste better from a stolen mug?

The lads then turn their attention to the gentrification of Margate, posing the question: is it a seaside gem or... just a sh*thole?

Plus, Pete reflects on the whirlwind of heartfelt congratulations (and a few dubious comments) he’s received about his family’s adoption journey…thankfully, the adoption council wasn’t made up of you lot!

If you've been to Margate and loved it or hated it, we want to know why! Email us at [email protected]

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Thanks to a LAPS in judgement regarding the use of protection spells, both Pete and Luke were cursed by the lurgy witch over Christmas, which means they couldn't record the final episode of 2024.

Never fear, they're starting a brand new year with some great brand new stories (that MI6 agent who zipped himself into a sports bag in a bath in Pimlico).

[email protected] if you've had a memorable new year - let us know!

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Today, the lads put the piss in precipice as they bid farewell to 2024!

Pete shares the tale of throwing his shoulder out while shadowboxing to impress the wife he has access to, while Luke issues an important year-end reminder: never trust a man selling both a car battery and a deli block of cheese.

Plus, listener emails bring plenty of laughs, including one poor soul’s cold shower encounter featuring horse-related podcast banter and an awkward run-in with their head of department. And just when you think the chaos couldn’t get any stranger, the lads tackle a truly bizarre topic: could Brussels really be hiding a dark secret as a holiday destination for paedophiles?

Expect unfiltered nonsense, unexpected detours, and plenty of 2024 nostalgia.

Email: [email protected] or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram for tales of festive cheers, beers and rears.

***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** 

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Happy Boxing Day! Hope you and yours are having a smashing festive week - certainly more than a listener who emailed in with a shudderingly cringe Christmas proposal story…

We then celebrate Christmas in the only way we know how: by charting the bizarre history of Lads’ mags and sifting through some disappointing battery submissions. 

Email: [email protected] or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram for tales of festive cheers, beers and rears.

***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** 

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Luke’s been drooling all over himself on the train up to some important meetings - nice. Speaking of drooling (stay with us), Pete has some truly lovely news to share… 

We also get to the very bottom of the TikTok algorithm, continue to snoop on listeners’ LinkedIn profiles and take some fish to be fried. 

Email: [email protected] or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram for tales of festive cheers, beers and rears.

***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** 

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After inadvertently being poisoned by Pete, Luke finds the time to update us on his recent quest to deliver Christmas gifts to the bloke who owned his house. It has taken a depressingly predictable turn. 

James McCartney also continues to astound - you’re a grown man, James - and we get more details on the Nugget Power Hour. Plus, we try to ensure this week’s battery selection has a festive flavour.

Email: [email protected] or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram for tales of festive cheers, beers and rears.

***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.