Raise your hand if you think your estranged adult child's spouse or partner is the main cause of the estrangement between you. If your hand is raised, you have lots of company. Parents who are unwillingly estranged from an adult child often worry that a son- or daughter-in-law has driven a wedge between them. They feel powerless in the face of that person's influence, and wonder if they'll ever be allowed to be close to their adult child or grandchildren again. This is admittedly a frightening and frustrating position for parents and grandparents. But as Tina points out in this thought-provoking episode, things are not always as they seem. Show notes are at reconnectionclub.com/113

It's not pleasant, but it happens. Find out why, and how best to respond, in this episode.

Show notes are at https://reconnectionclub.com/112

An episode for parents with trauma in their history, or any parent who identifies as feeling "broken."

Show notes are at https://reconnectionclub.com/111

If only we always did what we know we should do, instead of what we somehow end up doing despite our better judgment. When it comes to reconnecting with estranged adult children, many parents have good information to go on, and even better intentions. They know what to do, whether it be listening more, reaching out less, or something else. But if you're like the rest of us, you don't always put what you know into practice. What gets in the way, and what can you do about it if you haven't been following your best protocol to solve the estrangement of your adult child(ren)? In this episode, Tina talks about two big obstacles that keep knowing from becoming doing.

Show notes at https://reconnectionclub.com/110

Starting this month, The RC Podcast will release new episodes every other week instead of weekly.

Over two episodes, 108 and 109, Tina touches on six obstacles that challenge parents trying to reconnect with their estranged adult children: Confusion, comparison, defensiveness, paralysis, emotional reasoning, and fear. Part 1 (Episode 108) addressed the first three and Part 2 (this episode) the second three. Over and over, these six internal stumbling blocks keep parents from making progress. Tina explains the difficulties and what you can do to get past them. While there may be external obstacles between you and your estranged adult child, start where you have the most power; dismantle internal obstacles first. A self that is whole has more power to overcome challenges than one in pieces.

Over two episodes, 108 and 109, Tina touches on six obstacles that challenge parents trying to reconnect with their estranged adult children: Confusion, comparison, defensiveness, paralysis, emotional reasoning, and fear. Part 1 (Episode 108) addresses the first three and Part 2 (Episode 109) the second three. Over and over, these six internal stumbling blocks keep parents from making progress. Tina explains the difficulties and what you can do to get past them. While there may be external obstacles between you and your estranged adult child, start where you have the most power; dismantle internal obstacles first. A self that is whole has more power to overcome challenges than one in pieces.

Estrangement from your adult child(ren) presents a special sorrow during the holiday season. Part of the suffering is inevitable for parents; the loss of connection to one's own children hurts. But there's another aspect of estrangement that you can do something about today. And that is to reconnect with yourself, through the practice of staying present. In this grounding episode, Tina reminds us that there's always someone home inside us. Even when we're missing other people, it's important that we show up for ourselves. Three ways for unwillingly estranged parents to stay present during the holidays (and every day) are explained in this episode. But as Tina points out, there are many more. Happy holidays to everyone; may we all find many moments of peace, meaning and connection. For many more practical tips on how to repair an estranged relationship with your adult child(ren) and yourself, see Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join at ReconnectionClub.com.

Sibling rivalry is an unfortunate fact of life in many families. It can contribute to estrangement from parents as well.

There are two situations where this is especially true, which Tina addresses in this informative episode.

One is when your estranged adult child accuses you of playing favorites, either in childhood or on a continuing basis, thereby promoting sibling rivalry.

Another is when two or more of your adult children aren't getting along with each other.

Often this type of conflict is due to, or exacerbated by, the estrangement of one sibling from parents and possibly other family members.

In this episode, Tina makes suggestions about how to handle each of the above scenarios. You as the parent have more power than you might think in both cases.

To work your way back to a healthy, mutually beneficial relationship with your currently estranged adult child, there might be changes you wish to make.

Something went wrong in the relationship you share. To repair your damaged bond, you may wish to show up in a different way for your adult child.

Typical changes desired are for parents to listen more, criticize less, reduce or increase expectations placed on the adult child, etc.

Many changes requested by estranged adult children are ones that could benefit the parent as well. For this reason, and because the relationship may depend on it, you need to know how to actually change – not just to talk about it, but to do it.

This episode outlines four specific steps to making a change. Be ready to take notes!