The desire to share life with a partner doesn’t just disappear when we choose to start our families on our own. And it doesn’t have to. Today’s new episode is a beautiful reminder that both things can be true: you can want motherhood and partnership, and you don’t have to give up one to have the other.
At 35, Erin Russell was faced with the hard realization that her family line would end with her if she didn’t pursue parenthood soon, so she started seriously considering solo motherhood. But right as she was preparing to begin fertility treatments, life threw her a curveball — she met someone.
Erin was clear about what she wanted and gave the relationship space to grow. But when it became obvious they weren’t aligned on having kids, she made the powerful decision to walk away. She ordered donor sperm the very next day.
Becoming a mom didn’t erase Erin's hope of sharing life with a partner. Just two months after her son was born, she started dating again — not out of pressure or urgency, but as a way to reconnect with herself, enjoy adult time, and stay open to love.
Now that her son is two and she’s happily in a relationship that feels like the right fit, Erin reflects on what it’s been like to still want partnership as a solo mom by choice, and how she's navigating love, parenting, and a changing sense of identity all at once.
In this episode, we talk about:
- How Erin knew it was time to pursue solo motherhood
- The challenges of navigating IUI, IVF, and insurance hurdles
- Why "just surviving" the newborn stage isn’t enough, and how building a support system made all the difference
- The guilt and reality of sending your baby to daycare as a solo mom
- Dating as a solo mom: why Erin started early, how she set her own pace, and what she looked for in a partner
- How she’s weaving her new relationship into her solo mom life
- And why the grief of doing it alone doesn’t just disappear once your baby arrives
Whether you're considering solo motherhood, already parenting, or wondering if dating might fit into your life someday, Erin’s story is full of honesty, hope, and real-world encouragement for wherever you are on the path.
Want to connect with Erin Russell?
- Follow Erin on Instagram
- Check out Erin's writing
- Read Erin's article on SMBCs (featuring me as an interviewee!)
🏝️ Interested in the Aug 27-31 Family Trip to Riviera Maya, Mexico? Join one of these info sessions to get all the details!
👩👧👦The Single Greatest Choice is the single mother by choice resource you’ve been craving for every stage of your SMBC journey. You can find 1:1 Coaching for every stage of solo motherhood by choice, Community Groups for thinkers, triers, and pregnant SMBCs, The SGC The SGC Village Membership Community, Retreats for early stage SMBCs and Family Trips for moms & kids.
Reach out to Katie over at [email protected]
