Most people don’t overthink everything. They overthink the worst. One comment from your partner, one email from your boss, one slow week in business, and your brain writes a disaster movie. You rehearse rejection, failure, conflict, embarrassment. Then you call it being realistic.

In EP 3603, Why can’t we overthink the best?, Shaun O’Gorman flips that pattern on its head. If your mind can run 50 scenarios where it all goes wrong, it can run 50 scenarios where you handle it, adapt, and win. Same brain. Same imagination. Different direction.

This episode breaks down why your nervous system defaults to threat scanning, and how that habit sabotages confidence and performance. When you overthink the worst, you don’t prepare, you panic. You avoid conversations. You play small. You start living a life built around risk management instead of purpose.

Overthinking the best is not delusion. It’s rehearsal. It’s training your attention to look for options and actions instead of only danger. You respect risk, but you don’t worship it.

Shaun gives you a simple tool to retrain your thinking without pretending life is perfect: 

You’ll learn how to use optimism as a strategy, not a mood, and how to build an internal dialogue that creates calm, clarity, and decisive action under pressure. If you’re tired of your mind being the loudest enemy in the room, this is your reset.

Listen now and start aiming your thinking at the life you actually want to build.

The post EP 3603 Why can’t we overthink the best? appeared first on The Strong Life Project.

In EP 3602 of The Strong Life Project, Shaun O’Gorman breaks down the concept of vagal authority and why some people can walk into pressure, conflict, or chaos and instantly change the energy in the room. This is not charisma, status, or volume. It is nervous system regulation, the capacity to stay grounded and connected while your body wants to spike into fight, flight, or shut down.

Shaun explains what the vagus nerve does in plain language and why calm is not a personality trait, it is a trained physiological skill. The vagus nerve is a major two way communication pathway between brain and body that influences heart rate, breathing, digestion, and recovery.  When it is working well, it helps you downshift after stress, think clearly under load, and stay open to connection. Higher cardiac vagal activity and high frequency HRV are often linked with better self regulation and executive control.  When it is not, you might look fine on the outside but live wired, reactive, impatient, numb, or exhausted.

You will learn how vagal authority shows up in leadership, parenting, relationships, and high performance. The person with the most regulated nervous system often has the most influence, because people can feel safety or threat through tone, facial expression, pace, posture, and presence long before they hear your words.

This episode also challenges the trendy, oversimplified vagus hacks floating around online.  Shaun focuses on what actually builds capacity over time: consistent sleep and training, breath control, down regulation routines, emotional honesty, boundaries, and choosing behaviour over excuses.

If you have been stuck in high alert, snapping at people you love, or feeling flat and disconnected, this is your reset. Listen in, identify your patterns, and start building the kind of authority that makes people trust you without you having to demand it. At the end, Shaun gives a drill you can use in 60 seconds to rehearse regulation.

The post EP 3602 What is Vagal authority? appeared first on The Strong Life Project.

We pull the curtain back on the invisible code that runs your life. Most people think they are making conscious decisions, but they are mostly executing old patterns that were installed through childhood, culture, trauma, peer influence, relationships, and the job they do. That programming shows up in the same places again and again: the way you react under pressure, the stories you tell yourself, the standards you tolerate, the relationships you repeat, and the excuses you keep protecting.

This episode breaks down how your programming forms and how it becomes automatic. If you have a short fuse, avoid conflict, chase approval, self-sabotage, procrastinate, overwork, or numb out; those are not random flaws. They are strategies your nervous system learned to survive. The problem is that what once protected you can now keep you stuck. Your default settings might be costing you your health, your leadership, your confidence, and your closest relationships.

You will be challenged to identify your triggers and the moments you “switch” without thinking. You will learn how to spot the thought loops that sound like truth but are actually conditioning. More importantly, you will get practical steps to start rewriting the code: slow down the reaction, name the pattern, interrupt it with a deliberate behaviour, and reinforce a better response until it becomes your new normal.

This is not motivational fluff. It is a call to take ownership of your internal operating system. Because if you do not choose your programming, someone else already did. And if you keep running the same code, you will keep getting the same results.

The post EP 3601 What is your programming? appeared first on The Strong Life Project.

In this episode, Shaun O’Gorman breaks down a modern trap that’s quietly crushing good people: productivity dysmorphia. It’s the distorted belief that you’re never doing enough, even when you’re performing, progressing, and carrying serious responsibility. You look at your week, your body of work, your family load, and your leadership demands and still feel behind. Not because you are behind, but because your internal scoreboard is broken.

Shaun unpacks how this mindset forms through comparison culture, endless metrics, and the addictive pull of “just one more task.” You’ll hear why high performers are especially vulnerable: competence raises expectations, so you keep moving the goalposts. The cost is brutal: chronic stress, short fuse, poor sleep, relationship erosion, and the constant background guilt that you should be working.

The episode gives you a practical reset. First, separate activity from impact by defining what “productive” actually means in your current season. Second, install a daily definition of done so you can finish the day without negotiating with your own mind. Third, audit the lies driving the pressure such as perfectionism, fear of falling behind, and identity tied to output. Shaun also challenges the common mistake of trying to fix a mindset problem with more time management. If you don’t address the belief…

Shaun shares signs: you minimise wins, you feel anxious during rest, you constantly rewrite your to do list, and you judge yourself by what’s unfinished rather than what’s completed. He offers a seven day challenge: document evidence of value delivered, not hours worked.

You’ll leave with a simple framework to measure progress without self-punishment: choose three priorities, track one meaningful outcome, and deliberately create recovery so your nervous system can handle the load. This is about building a life that performs without breaking. Stop chasing more and start owning enough.

The post EP 3600 Do you suffer from productivity dysmorphia? appeared first on The Strong Life Project.

In EP 3599, What is your highest ROI behaviour change, Shaun O’Gorman cuts through the noise and asks a ruthless question: if you could only change one behaviour that would create the biggest improvement across your life, what would it be?

This episode is about leverage. Not motivation. Not a new routine you do for three days. Leverage means one behaviour that multiplies results across your health, relationships, leadership, mood, energy, confidence, and performance. Shaun breaks down how most people chase low value changes because they feel productive, while avoiding the uncomfortable high value behaviours that actually shift identity and outcomes.

You will hear a practical way to identify your highest ROI behaviour change by tracking where your life consistently breaks down and linking it to the behaviour that drives the pattern. Shaun explores common high ROI levers such as sleep discipline, emotional regulation under pressure, honest communication, removing alcohol or junk inputs, daily training, and taking ownership instead of blaming circumstances. The point is not the specific behaviour. The point is selecting the one that creates the greatest ripple effect, then locking it in through standards, environment design, and repetition.

Shaun also challenges the listener to stop negotiating with themselves. If you keep treating your best life like an optional extra, you will keep getting optional results. The episode closes with a simple commitment framework: choose the behaviour, define the minimum non negotiable version, set the trigger, and track it daily for long enough that it becomes who you are, not something you try.

The post EP 3599 What is your highest ROI behaviour change? appeared first on The Strong Life Project.

Most people don’t fail because they can’t do the work. They fail because they keep running from the thing they most need to face. In this episode, I break down why avoidance looks like comfort, but it quietly destroys your confidence, your relationships, and your results.

If you keep distracting yourself, blaming timing, waiting to feel ready, or hoping the pressure will disappear, you’re training your brain to believe you’re not capable. Avoidance isn’t neutral. It’s a vote for the version of you that stays stuck. And the longer you do it, the heavier it gets. What you won’t deal with doesn’t go away. It builds interest.

We talk about the real cost of running, how it shows up in everyday life, and why it often hides behind “busy” and “I’ve got too much on.” I also share a practical way to identify what you’re avoiding and why. Because there’s always a payoff. It might be avoiding discomfort. It might be avoiding failure. It might be avoiding success and the responsibility that comes with it.

You’ll learn how to stop negotiating with yourself, how to take the first small action that breaks the loop, and how to build self trust by doing what you said you’d do. This isn’t about motivation. It’s about identity. Every time you face the thing you want to avoid, you become a stronger, calmer, more reliable person.

If you want better outcomes, stop sprinting away from the hard conversations, the hard choices, and the hard work. Turn around. Face it. Do the next right thing.

The post EP 3598 Stop running away from what you don’t want appeared first on The Strong Life Project.

In this episode, I challenge the trap most people live in: judging your life by outcomes you can’t fully control. Results are noisy. They’re influenced by timing, other people, the economy, the algorithm, injury, weather, luck and variables you’ll never master. When you build your self-worth, motivation, and discipline on results, you become emotionally fragile. You win and feel fine. You lose and spiral. That’s not high performance, that’s gambling with your identity.

Instead, we go behaviour-based. Behaviours are controllables. They’re the daily standards you can execute no matter what happens. The goal is not to ignore results. The goal is to stop using results as your scoreboard for who you are. Results are data. Behaviours are the driver.

I break down a simple framework: define the identity you want, convert it into non-negotiable behaviours, then measure consistency, not mood. You’ll learn how to set process goals that stack into outcomes, how to build momentum when progress feels invisible, and how to stay locked in when life punches you in the mouth. We talk training, business, relationships, and mental health, because the same principle applies everywhere.

You’ll hear practical examples: chasing scale weight versus hitting protein, steps, sleep and training; chasing revenue versus making the calls, shipping the content, and following up; chasing a perfect relationship versus showing respect, listening, and keeping promises. I also cover the excuses that sabotage people: “I’m not seeing results yet,” “I’ll start when I feel motivated,” and “It’s not working.” It is working. You’re just addicted to feedback.

Your challenge is simple: pick three behaviours for the next 14 days, track them daily, and judge yourself only on execution. If you miss, don’t negotiate. Reset and execute the next rep. Pick your standards. Track your behaviours. Let the results catch up.

The post EP 3597 Be behaviour based not results based appeared first on The Strong Life Project.

In EP 3596 Haters are just unfulfilled, Shaun O’Gorman breaks down a blunt truth most people avoid: the loudest critics are rarely your real problem, your reaction to them is. This episode unpacks why “haters” so often show up when you start improving, building, or leading, and why their negativity usually says more about their own frustration than it does about your choices. Shaun explores the psychology behind projection, insecurity, and status threats, and how people who feel stuck will sometimes try to drag others back down to feel better about their own lack of action.

You will hear a practical framework for staying focused when criticism hits, including how to separate useful feedback from emotional noise, how to stop outsourcing your confidence to other people’s approval, and how to keep moving when you feel tempted to defend yourself. Shaun also calls out the hidden danger of constantly explaining yourself, because it trains you to seek permission instead of building self trust. If you are trying to grow your business, improve your health, level up your relationship, or simply become a more disciplined version of yourself, this episode gives you a mindset reset and a set of behaviours to protect your progress.

The takeaway is simple: you cannot live a big life and remain universally liked. Your job is not to win everyone over. Your job is to stay aligned, do the work, and become the person who can handle the heat that comes with growth.

The post EP 3596 Haters are just unfulfilled appeared first on The Strong Life Project.

Fear isn’t just an emotion. It’s a biological alarm system designed to keep you alive. In this episode, I break down why fear can feel so paralysing, even when the threat isn’t real, immediate, or rational. When your nervous system reads danger, it prioritises survival over logic. That’s why you can know what to do and still feel stuck, avoidant, reactive, or frozen.

We unpack the three common fear responses most people cycle through without realising: fight, flight, and freeze. Freeze is the one that looks like procrastination, overthinking, perfectionism, scrolling, shutting down, and “I’ll start tomorrow.” It’s not laziness. It’s a protective response. But the problem is, if you keep obeying fear, you train your brain to treat normal life as a threat and your world gets smaller.

I explain how fear becomes amplified through uncertainty, past experiences, and the stories you repeat. Most fear is future focused. It’s the mind rehearsing worst case scenarios and calling it preparation. The cost is huge: missed opportunities, strained relationships, poorer leadership, and a life lived well under your potential.

This episode is about getting practical. You’ll learn how to interrupt the fear loop, regulate your state, and take action in small, controlled reps so your nervous system learns that you’re safe. Confidence doesn’t arrive before action. It’s built because of action. If fear has been running your decisions, this is your reminder that you can feel fear and still move forward. Your life expands on the other side of what you’re avoiding.

The post EP 3595 Why is fear so paralysing appeared first on The Strong Life Project.

Most people think the goal is to climb faster. Work harder. Get more done. Win more. But here’s the brutal truth: you can spend years doing everything “right” and still end up miserable if you’re climbing the wrong ladder.

In this episode, I break down why high achievers often feel flat, restless, or secretly resentful even when life looks successful from the outside. It is not because you are ungrateful. It is because your direction is wrong. You have been optimising effort instead of alignment.

We unpack the warning signs that you are chasing someone else’s definition of success: constant urgency, never feeling finished, needing external validation, and using achievement to avoid discomfort in relationships, health, and self respect. I walk through a simple framework to pressure test your current goals against your values, your season of life, and what you actually want your days to look like, not just what you want your bio to say.

You will learn how to audit your ladder before you waste another year. How to define success in a way that creates peace, not just progress. How to make hard decisions that protect your time, energy, and relationships. And how to course correct without burning your whole life down.

This is a reality check for driven people who do not want to wake up at 60 with money, status, and regret. If you want a life that feels strong, calm, and proud from the inside out, start here.

The post EP 3594 Don’t get to the top of the ladder and realise it’s against the wrong wall appeared first on The Strong Life Project.