Welcome to Dr Sarah: Relationship Success Lab, where high achievers, executives, and entrepreneurs explore relationship fitness, healing from relationship trauma, and creating secure, trusting, and loving partnerships. Designed for those navigating high-stakes careers and relationships, we dive into trauma-informed coaching, relationship wellbeing, and practical strategies to recover from trauma bonding and build meaningful connections. Save your marriage, start building secure relationships and optimizing your relationship wellbeing.

 

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Today, I want to talk about a question I've been asked multiple times: Can you experience a trauma bond without overt abuse? I've heard variations of this question from various people over time, clients included. The core issue is feeling the signs of a trauma bond without clearly labeling your partner's behavior as abusive.

I've dealt with this in my own life, and I get it. The thing is, abuse isn't always blatant; it can be subtle, like manipulation and gaslighting. Growing up, we often learned to recognize abuse as something clear and physical. But the truth is, the more insidious forms of abuse, like manipulation, can be even more damaging because they're less obvious.

Let me share a client's story. She was in a relationship for years, feeling miserable but hesitant to call it abusive because her partner never physically hurt her. In one session, she said she wished he had hit her because then she'd have clear justification to leave. This revealed a common misconception: abuse doesn't always have to be physical.

It depends on factors like personality and attachment style. If you're highly empathic or conscientious, you might internalize blame and responsibility unnecessarily. I've seen it happen – partners being short or aggressive, and instead of addressing it, you take on the responsibility to fix things, leading to self-blame.

Let me be real; abuse comes in various forms: gaslighting, manipulation, criticism, even subtle threats. Emotional abuse activates the same brain responses as physical abuse.

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Welcome to Trauma Bonding to Secure Relationships with Dr Sarah — the podcast that helps ambitious individuals and couples heal trauma bonding and toxic relationship cycles to build secure attachments and loving healthy relationships.

Hosted by Dr Sarah, psychologist, relationship strategist, and founder of Heal Trauma Bonding and Relationship Success Lab, this show guides you through practical tools and deep insights on:

✅ Healing from trauma bonding, anxious attachment style, and codependency
✅ Building emotional resilience and secure attachment styles a
✅ Improving communication, empathy, and emotional intimacy
✅ Reclaiming your identity, boundaries, and self-worth
✅ Creating lasting relationship happiness and passion

Whether you're recovering from betrayal, navigating codependency, or simply ready to break free from the past, this podcast gives you the clarity, strength, and strategy to move forward

We hope you got massive value from this episode for your own healing and relationship progress.