Unofficial

Mind over matter. Mind your P’s and Q’s. Do you mind? Melissa Edwards, minds. She’s concerned that the colloquial phrases we thoughtlessly utter are limiting our potential, so she wrote a book, Mind Your Words (how idioms shape consciousness) Coop and Myan are buying Melissa‘s book and thus be susceptible to Eckhart Tolle’s corporate, mind-prison takeover, no more. Nice try, Oprah. No longer will Myan be looking forward to his wedding as the best day of his life and Coop will now think twice before uttering “FML“ every time he forgets to invoke the ubiquitous nature of his sovereign spirit. Unofficial doesn’t play by the rules but we definitely won’t play without a plan. Boobs vs Butts, the platonic sexual intimacy of chocolate and the truly unpredictable path your life can take when you major in communications, all of these conundrums will be solved by your favorite Warriors of the Truth, Coop and Myan...Coop, Coop and Myan.

What do you get when you combine Nectar Work and Grand Opal? 103104. Duh. Lana Inderman and Anna Bella from 103104 Productions drop by J30 Studio to share their story of making it on your own in Hollywood. And by "on your own" I mean, with the help of hundreds of talented, driven professionals in all facets of film and music production. Without communities like Starr44 Artists Alliance and collaborative partnerships like Lana n' Anna's, the artistic products that help shape and elevate our global community, would not exist. Uplifting projects like Light On Sunshine, A Rose in the Wall and superstars on the cusp of world domination like their partner and musical phenom, Ali Starrlight are just the beginning for this young, insightful, powerful, beautiful dynamic duo and Coop and Myan can barely contain their excitement. Well, Coop seems pretty chill but Myan prattles like a nitwit from pillar to post. So, Unofficial business as usual.

http://www.starr44.com/home-3/

Adult responsibility. D'ya hear that? I'm an adult! With the rising prices of LA rent, the crazy taxes that swallow our incomes and the daunting expense of the looming nightmare of parenting, you would think Uber and Lyft would have our backs and maybe keep the collective flatulence to a minimum. Coop and Myan are on the cusp of closing their first season of Unofficial and hate to be the bearer of bad news but it looks like Elvis is dead. Tom Magliozzi of CarTalk is also dead and so is Coop's Saab 9S. "Aren't you a mechanic? Why wouldn't you put oil in the car?" Car fanatics had Click and Clack and now Pod-heads have Riff and Raff...and unfortunately Dr. Cop, D.A. The long awaited drama for those of you who wish you could watch all your favorite Doctor, Cop and Lawyer shows but just don't have 14 hours free every day. If Time is Art's most valuable investment then it looks like Unofficial will be the greatest artistic venture man has ever bestowed on the world because Coop and Myan will never quit, no matter how many times Coop threatens to pull the plug.

Have you ever dreamt the biggest that you could? And then doubled it?? Well that's what you're doing today when you tune in to Unofficial's epic, 20th episode. Sydney and Samadhi crash J30 studio with a huge, lady-like bang and remind Coop and Myan just how inferior men really are. Just kidding, we're all equal. Totally equal. If you've never heard "mew-mew", never performed your vocal stylings for audiences in LA traffic or ever lied about having a fiancé to avoid a battle of bad body language with Terrance, you should probably devour at least a third of this 90 minute, Unofficial juggernaught, Baby girl.

Now look, there's some serious stuff in this episode so be aware of that, Sydney and Samadhi have our deepest respect and appreciation for being forthright about their experiences and opinions but making out with fruit, falling in love to near nerosis levels and only dating a demographic exclusively associated with serial killers, is uniquely female. And so is naming your cat after Kendrick Lamar in the acid-wake of once again being disappointed by a man. Whoever said that women aren't funny has never heard one say, "Who in this room wants to fuck me?" That's the kind of candid, curtain-pulling honesty you won't find on the social programming, propaganda boxes of mainstream media. Unofficial is local. Seasonal. Unconditional. We're walking into that room, groomed to be chosen, and we're falling in love every day. Even if we don't know what in the hell that even means.

Harambe and a baby go Glamping in the woods. No wait, Robert De Niro and Al Pacino are getting married on a booze cruise to Jamaica. Hold on…a congested bear is vomiting in my ‘66 Ford F100 which for some reason I can’t rent to Steven Spielberg for his next summer blockbuster because no matter how cool my truck is nobody wants it because it’s RED!! Apparently red is always a bad choice for a car color, just ask Cooper’s mom. Speaking of hilarious, inter-species partnerships, Coop and Myan‘s meteoric rise to the top of the podcast charts is like a freshly tapped Maple in the Deepwoods of Maine in January. With episode 20 just days away, the boys take a heavy dose of Brobiotics in preparation for the up-and-coming epic, 90 minute viral-special with the two most beautiful women in the world. According to Myan. Who apparently hates hyperbole. So you know it’s gotta be true. Too bad we’re only a podcast. For the record they are both far more than their collective physical beauty but this is episode 19, so check in next week for the elaborate, non-sexist, equality-driven description of the brilliant and talented, Sydney and Samadhi. But join us now for Coop and Myan's final Teen-numbered recording session and earn the right to call yourself an Official, Unofficial Ground-floor Junky, as we all unavoidably resign to the ultimate, sweet relief of death.

ART! Crowd funding! Beurre blanc! A GIRL!! Unofficial has it all this week, Sydney Sainté and Mikel Farber, both hard working, self promoting artists in LA, join us for our first two-guest show and our first guest without a penis. I already said “girl“ once and I’m saving “vagina“ for later. If you’re not aware, there are people out there making movies for almost nothing, shooting features with iPhones and putting on music festivals with their own money. Art isn’t just Big Hollywood productions and Orson Welles isn’t the only independent filmmaker in town. For the record I think Orson Welles is dead. Yup, he’s dead. He died three months after the release of Back to the Future. I don’t know if there’s a connection but Robert Zemeckis is still alive so you tell me. Coop and Myan are like the Kendrick and Kanye of the podcast biosphere. One of them is one hell of a rapper and the other one won’t shut the fuck up. Hopefully that line between genius and mental illness doesn’t wear too thin. Join us this week for our individual moments of brilliance, fire up your MAGA Genesis and sear that salmon on its show-side, why? Because life is only a blip. Vagina!

LA has a lotta pot... holes. You think driving in LA is hell on your car? Try NOT driving in NYC. Tired of old cars just piling up on your front lawn? Start watching ChrisFix on YouTube and trade in those rust buckets for emotionally rewarding, grease-monkey goose-flesh. Apologies to America’s many talented mechanics but “grease-monkey“ sounds hilarious. And apologies to geese, I know “chills” is a far more socially acceptable term. I probably should apologize to monkeys too but seriously, fuck monkeys. Coop and Myan are jazzercised to bring you their first Extra Special Quickie Day Episode. I know, it sounds amazing when you put it like that but really we just needed a missing piece of audio equipment we had to pop out for last minute and ran outta time. That behind-the-curtain nuts-and-bolts transparency is what sets Unofficial apart from the smoke and mirrors of Hollywood. Or as the locals call it, the industry of lying liars...and sexual predators. Get your bi-weekly fix of Unofficial, grab some popcorn and listen to us talk about people watching other people play video games. Just don’t go to the bathroom until you defeat MotherBrain or I swear to God, Cooper will pull the plug on this whole goddamn thing.

You can’t spell Unofficial without The "Office." OK you don’t need the “E“ but you have to admit that’s pretty damn close. The time has finally come, the dream is real, Coop and Myan have found a way to productively justify watching 10,000 hours of The Office. Our moms will be so proud. If you think drugs are bad then you haven’t staved off a life-threatening bout of sadness with 25 cc’s of Officillin. I don’t know what cc’s are but I know who CC is and if you got that joke then you are probably an Office-head too. Join the club and join Coop, Myan and Ben Gavin for our first Official, Unofficial Office episode, Volume 1. The first installment of a tradition that should probably never have been started in the first place...but what the hell, the earth is going to explode from our sun’s eventual supernova at some point anyway so why not sit back and relive the golden years of TVs arguable top spot sitcom of all time, with new insight from the podcast world’s newest and hardest hitting inimitable duo as Coop and Myan do, The Office Vol 1. TOO FAR!! THANKS A LOT, MAN!

So you think you’re ugly enough to make it in Hollywood? Great, because there’s lots of roles for the physically unfortunate so find your niche, “guy in corner.” Coop’s really good day in the first world goes south as he plunges Boot-holes-first into one of LA’s infamous muddy puddles. Good thing he brought his 24 hour Hydro flask, chocked full of his mom’s homemade espresso pods, pre-ground in a factory months ago by the hundreds of thousands, just for you. Myan gets his own dose of the Mondays as his first world struggle with his plethora of Apple products seems to have no end. Like a vat of unfrothed raw milk you just keep steaming and steaming aaand STEAMING...!!

Join us this week for a glimpse at Cooper’s naked ankles and a lukewarm oatmilk Cortado and if that is not enough to sooth your involuntary racism just call Apple support and ask for Chayla... she’s going make some lucky guy one hell of a neck someday.

Do you like drugs? Do you have addictions? Are new year's resolutions just a little outside your comfort zone? Don't worry, just don't be a hypocrite and we won't do to you what we did to Pluto. Coop and Myan release their first, second show in a week and rumor has it, they are stoked on doubling your weekly fix. So if you're looking to supplant your existing obsessions with something that's guaranteed to be good for you (not a guarantee) then get off the Menthols and start rolling your own. Subscribe to Unofficial, resist the BSP and don't forget the potatoes.