Was I in a Cult?

When Raidah left medical school in Sydney to spend the summer at what was promise to be an Islamic utopia in Jordan, she thought she was taking a break to heal.

Instead, she found herself inside a high-control religious community led by Nuh Ha Mim Keller — an American-born Catholic convert who reinvented himself as a Sufi sheikh and built a devoted following of Muslims living in Western countries.

Through his English-language books, lectures, and retreats, Keller promised these diaspora Muslims a spiritual home — a refuge from Western chaos and Islamophobia.

But what Raidah found instead… was a cult.

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FOLLOW RAIDAH SHAH IDIL

Follow Raidah on Instagram → @raidahwrites

Check out her debut novel How to Free a Jinn — available now from Allen & Unwin (ANZ and Asia) and Simon & Schuster in the U.S

READ Storm Without a Port (PDF) — the 77-page survivor testimony compiled by former members of the Jordanian Sufi cult.

Visit In Shaykh's Clothing — a resource for Muslim survivors of spiritual abuse.

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Today's story isn't about a reality TV show—though a lot of people think it starts there. In truth, it began long before the cameras, before the matching outfits and the too-perfect smiles.

You know the TLC series 19 Kids & Counting—the Duggars and their seemingly perfect world built within the IBLP.

But there was another Duggar—of sorts. Not a sibling. The cousin. Amy. Or as America came to know her, "Crazy Cousin Amy."

Except she wasn't crazy. Isn't crazy. Not even close. She just wasn't in their cult—the IBLP. What no one saw, though, was that Amy—an only child—was surviving her own hell at home.

Her new memoir, Holy Disruptor, is a story of breaking cycles, setting boundaries, and finding herself in the aftermath. Today, she joins us to talk about her journey—from the quiet terror of her childhood to life in the public eye, through the scandals that shattered her trust, and toward a life built on truth, healing, and peace… even when it means disrupting "family."

And no, she wasn't in the IBLP, but by the end, she may just find herself wondering… "Wait—was I in a cult?"

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FOLLOW AMY DUGGAR KING

Folly Amy @amyrachelleking

Get her new memoir: Holy Disruptor — available wherever books are sold.

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If you believe in what we're doing — please rate, review, and share the podcast. It helps more than you know.

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Nine years. One strip-mall church. A duffel bag full of cash, a freezing pool full of goldfish, and a pastor who convinced everyone he had a direct line to God.

This week, Alisha takes us inside Church of the Harvest — a charismatic California congregation that promised purpose, purity, and a path to the pulpit… but delivered something far darker.

Hazing disguised as holiness, unpaid labor disguised as "discipleship," and extreme control disguised as dating.

Because when your pastor asks you to "volunteer" full-time, pay tuition to do it, and maybe jump into a swamp at 3 a.m. to save metaphorical fish — you might just be in a cult.

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For more cult content, behind-the-scenes chaos, and occasional sermons from our strip-mall pulpit:

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Rate, review, and share the pod — it's free, legal, and no one will ask for your debit card "in faith."

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Follow Alisha:

TikTok/IG @Spillingthekoolaid &

IG: @Ezbakealisha

Last week, we met Paige: a bright-eyed engineer who joined SpaceX believing she was helping to save humanity. In Part 1, we followed her through the seduction — the mission, the 80-hour weeks, the Elon slogans on the walls, the slow loss of self until the job became the identity.

This week, the mission meets the myth. Paige helps organize an open letter — a polite but radical act of collective dissent in a cult-like workplace. And almost everyone is too scared to sign it.

What begins as a measured plea for change becomes a window into just how deep the fear-mongering and punitive control at SpaceX really run.

And soon, Paige learns what every defector from a high-demand system eventually does: that questioning the leader isn't seen as courage — it's seen as betrayal.

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HAVE A CULTY STORY?

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An ex–SpaceX engineer asks our favorite question: when does mission become mindset—and then eventually something more? Paige was convinced she was helping save humanity by working at SpaceX.

In Part 1, she traces the seduction: the purpose, the perks, the "Elon Algorithms" plastered on the wall, the complete devotion, the loss of individuality into one group identity, the isolation, the uncompensated labor, the belief that you are better than the rest… it all started to feel less like a workplace and more like… something else.

Today, we follow Paige's journey into the belly of the rocket factory. And next week? The fallout. When speaking up against the culture didn't just cost her a job… it made her a target.

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FOLLOW US

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The best way to fuel our mission? Rate, review, and share the pod with your people — word of mouth is rocket fuel.

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→ Become a member Patreon.

HAVE A CULTY STORY?

Whether it's a startup, a church, or just your weird improv troupe — we want to hear it.

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What if the yoga class you signed up for wasn't yoga at all, but the doorway to something much darker?

In this episode, Angel takes us inside Body & Brain Yoga and Tai Chi — a strip-mall wellness studio that seemed harmless enough. Until it wasn't. Instead of stretching, you're told to march in circles, punch your stomach, chant about your mother's failings, and spill your deepest traumas to a room full of strangers.

What Angel didn't know was that Body & Brain isn't just a quirky yoga chain. It's a nationwide empire with 70+ locations, millions in revenue, luxury retreats in Sedona — and a founder who flew private while his followers drowned in debt.

And that's just the beginning. Dig deeper and you'll find that Body & Brain is nothing new at all… it's the rebranded face of Dahn Yoga — one of the most notorious modern cults.

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Insta: @mtan_gel

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→ Join us on Patreon.

HAVE A CULTY STORY?

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She thought she was enrolling in a Bible college.

Instead, she was signing up to give her identity, her labor, her choice—and her fire—to a man who called himself the Holy Ghost Bartender.

At "River University," worship looked like laughing fits and collapsing bodies. Romance was arranged. Submission wasn't suggested—it was glorified. And your soul? That was just a tally mark on a clipboard.

For Sarah, what started as a mission from God turned into a 12-year descent through emotional control, spiritual abuse, and religious labor trafficking.

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Rodney's followers emptied their bank accounts at the altar. We just ask you to visit Patreon.

If this episode hit you—or made you question the price of obedience—share it, and leave a review.

To our Patreon members:

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A limo to Atlantic City. Pizzerias with back rooms. Garbage bags vanishing across boroughs.

Comedian Barry Rothbart grew up believing his dad didn't just live large—he made life larger. Then the tapes surfaced.

This isn't a mob story. It's what happens when your identity is forged from someone else's legend—only to discover the legend was a lie. As Barry unravels the mythology, his father's world curdles into something darker… and uncomfortably familiar to our show.

For the full, uncut conversation, hop over to our Patreon.

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Barry's dad kept his money in stacks above the bed. We prefer Patreon. If this episode hit you—or made you think twice about charisma, cons, or cult leaders—share it and then leave a review (but take the cannoli).

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CHECK OUT BARRY:

Barry Rothbart's investigative series Searching for Allan Rothbart is exclusively on Audible. It's equal parts mob tale, family reckoning, and cult-like indoctrination story. Don't miss it.

You can also follow Barry on social media → @barryrothbart

HAVE A CULTY STORY? We wanna hear it.

Email us: [email protected]

What happens when your entire life revolves around likes, follows, and perfectly staged smoothie bowls?

For Lee Tilghman — better known as @leefromamerica — it meant rising to the top of Instagram's wellness world… and losing herself in the process.

This week, we explore what it means to devote yourself to the cult of social media: when every thought and action becomes about what to post, when friends are replaced by followers, and when your online identity becomes the only one you know.

From the outside, the influencer life looks aspirational. But Lee asks: at what cost?

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COME SEE US LIVE!!

Los Angeles • September 9, 2025

With special guest: comedian Moses Storm

@ Dynasty Typewriter

VIP "Meet & Greet" tickets available!

Not in LA? No prob — livestream available too!

FOLLOW US for more culty content and behind-the-scenes chaos:

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The average person spends over 2 hours a day on social media. If this episode resonated—or even made you rethink your daily doomscroll—share it, leave a review. Hug a friend IRL.

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Have a culty story? We wanna hear it.

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And if you want more from today's guest, Lee from America:

Her brand-new book "If you Don't Like This, I Will Die" is out now

Find Lee → @leefromamerica

Michael grew up believing his hometown in Germany was just that — a quiet, picturesque community with cobblestone streets, tidy homes, a school, and a grocery store. At its heart stood the church, looming over daily life.

But what looked like small-town order was really something far darker. Built in the aftermath of World War II, by leaders with lingering Nazi ties, the town was engineered for control: walls without walls, designed to keep its people in and the rest of the world out.

Years later, in a casual conversation with a sibling, the truth unraveled:

This wasn't just a devout community.

It was a cult.

COME SEE US LIVE!!!

Los Angeles • September 9, 2025

With special guest: comedian Moses Storm

@ Dynasty Typewriter

VIP "Meet & Greet" tickets available!

Not in LA? No prob — livestream available too!

Special Thanks:

Big thanks to Maura Streppa for her gorgeous rendition of "Die Gedanken sind frei"

→ Follow Maura on Instagram @maurastreppamusic

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If this episode moved you — share it. Leave a review. Scream-sing Die Gedanken sind frei in your kitchen.

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