Found at 40

We Don’t Talk About Money in Midlife… Oh Wait, Yes We Do | Money, Marriage & Financial Power with Heather Boneparth


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Money shows up in every corner of midlife—our marriages, our stress, our parenting, our power, and our future—but most of us were raised not to talk about it at all. In this powerful midlife money and relationships episode, Chrissi sits down with lawyer and author Heather Boneparth, whose new book Money Together lands at the intersection of love, money, relationships, and partnership. From childhood money stories to mental load, caregiving, and financial power, they explore what it really takes to build a strong financial partnership in midlife. And yes—whether you’re dreaming of “the yacht life under chopper blades” straight out of Taylor Swift’s “Wi$h L$st,” just wanting a driveway with a basketball hoop and some financial peace of mind, this conversation proves money is never just about money. This episode isn’t about spreadsheets—it’s about rewriting your relationship with money, your partner, and yourself. 

(0:00) 🧠 The mental load that breaks relationships – Why invisible labor is often the real source of money tension

(3:00) 💬 Why we don’t talk about money – Cultural silence, shame, and where our money beliefs actually begin

(7:00) 🌱 Childhood money stories uncovered – How scarcity, privilege, and family dynamics shape adult finances

(11:00) 🧩 “Your story is your story” – Why comparing financial trauma inside relationships causes lasting damage

(15:00) 👶 When life blows up the budget – Parenthood, surprise expenses, and why flexibility matters more than perfect planning

(20:00) 🏡 Redefining the word “provider” – Why caregiving, time, and emotional labor are real financial contributions

(26:00) 💄 Spending guilt & self-worth – Why so many women feel they need permission to spend on themselves

(30:00) 🧺 The division of labor problem – How unequal home workload fuels financial resentment

(35:00) 🗓️ The power of the quarterly money date – How timing, structure, and intention transform money conversations

(40:00) 📊 Stepping into financial power – The three non-negotiables every partner needs to know about their money

(46:00) 🔑 Boundaries, time & personal agency – How knowing what you want changes every financial decision

(50:00) ❤️ Money, love & legacy – Why relationships—not wealth—are the true measure of success

Follow Heather Boneparth at @averagejoelle on Instagram or at https://www.readthejointaccount.com/

Get yourself a copy of Money Together at https://domoneytogether.com/ or anywhere you get your books!

✨ Hit follow, send this episode to your group chat, and leave a glowing review

📱 Check out @foundat40podcast on Instagram for extras, outtakes, and mild oversharing

🎙️ Listen on Apple Podcasts and Spotify

📺 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Foundat40

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Found at 40By Chrissi Harris

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